Claustrophobic Centers
Much has been felt
then written
about loneliness at the top
Less written,
yet perhaps far more often felt,
about claustrophobia in the center.
Problems with delegation,
boundaries,
predictable timelines,
responsive management focus,
follow through performance,
closeted partisanship,
competitions to be heard
listened to
appreciated
respected
for our therapeutic,
and not our terrorist,
potential
Nonviolent calm
peace,
by quietly listening contrast
to violent fears,
invites resiliently harmonic
win/win expansive
sublimely integrating
synergetic intention,
Short-term anticipation
slowly pushing out
and fading a cultural climate of anxiety,
chronic win/lose stress,
unmitigated perennial trauma histories
continuing in conspiracies of silence.
Integrity's economic political potential,
and not universal win/win perfectionism,
delivers resonantly happy,
wholesome,
healthy,
contented wealthy outcomes,
ecologically reconnecting
solidarity Here
with synergetic Now
sacred EarthTribal experience
Seasonally slow grown
with mythos
and eros
and ethos
and aesthetics
of panentheistic Paradise
monoculturally Lost
and yet polyculturally
anticipating robust Promise
Heavenly resonance
is not perfectly comprehensive control
of a punishingly depressive repressive
self and alienated Othering governance system
felt as unfree to vulnerably communicate
near a constantly threatened
despair about capacity to repair
my egocentric
transparently heady top
Of a monoculturally patriarchal
capital-infested
win/lose zero-sum monopoly game
of Seize My MonoAutonomous Day!
Without unconditional regard
for EgoSelf as primal co-mediator
of what we look like
synergetic,
versus what we feel like
and unlike
energetic,
at the top of our AnthroPrivileged lives
without perfect GoldenRule encircling love.
A healthier democratic trust
for expansive EarthTribe circles
of co-empathic investment
may outdoor ease
our anxious indoor claustrophobic disease
fearful of disappointing
both authority stuck stick-figures
and our relentlessly needy constituencies
Angry about loss of privacy
intimacy
engagement
compassion
integrity
sleep
robust nutritional choices
financial loss
inflation
taxation
authority figure predation
Conflicted win/lose co-dependency
silently settling for less than sacred communion experience
within EarthTribe's full sung range
of polycultural sensory voices
Multiculturing choices
to feel and grow better,
healthier,
safe wealthier together
than lonely dancing
singing solo apart
On a stage
with a too bright ego spotlight
narrowly glaring at my own soul-embodied
godlike protagonist
researching unconditional warm regard
Rather than conditioned cold disregard,
either against my own claustrophobic
aging and shrinking circle
of fellow travelers,
emigrating side by side toward inevitable mortality,
or standing alone at the supremely pompous top
of those already Othered
and thereby lessened--
followers,
shy sheep
ready to betray,
Rather than cooperatively informed collaborators
steeped in Earth's sacred co-investments
indigenously synergetic wisdom
and Sun's enlightened
whole open systemic focus.
I suppose integrity's co-empathic potential
for both/and nuanced
warm inviting cooperative regard
might be a contagiously viral
win/win alternative ecofeminist view
Anticipating re-integrating co-investments
re-connecting
ecological mythic enrichment
of epically wombed Here/Now
Sacred crucible
for my epistemological Body/Mind
timeless Life/Love experience
curiously divining interdependent
naked Truth/Beauty
restoring classic Mundane/Sacred
bicamerally balanced
trust Paradise lost,
truth glimpsed,
renewing testaments refound
In EarthTribe wounded circles,
traumatized,
but not yet broken
health-womb wealth
peaceful restorations
of synergetic solidarity
for Earth's most resilient thrival.
While much has been autonomously felt
then written in self-isolation
about uneasy loneliness at the pyrrhic competitive top
and diseased dismay
in a viciously shrinking circle
of traumatic EarthTribal climate despair,
bilaterally geno/eco suicidal,
desecrating inhumane
transparent and vulnerably bare
survival.
Copyright ©
Gerald Dillenbeck
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