7/24/2017 7:21:33 PM
Topic:
Honest Critique Wanted
Angeline Vine
Posts: 3
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The death grip of my dependence
shattered
by your mask of love
your chainsaw words
stained my electric eyes
with fear....
I stayed, with wounds
You get it? Add some creative descriptions !
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7/24/2017 7:03:52 PM
Topic:
Looking for an honest critique
Angeline Vine
Posts: 3
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I don't like the rhyme in this poem, though in a song I could see it. I usually prefer a free verse . The poem is sad and the reader certainly has pity for 'he' , as the subject continues to buy death (by drinking alcohol) on the installment plan. Hey that could be the title 'Death on Installment'
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7/24/2017 6:49:40 PM
Topic:
confused
Angeline Vine
Posts: 3
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I think you could remove the word 'but' from your poem. Good Luck!
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7/24/2017 9:30:10 AM
Topic:
Get Questions Answered
DANIEL MWANGI
Posts: 1
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I WISH TO GET A SOLO VERSE FROM THE BIBLE MATTHEW 2:1-10
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7/24/2017 3:03:58 AM
Topic:
Hi poet tree peeps...I just joined yesterday...
Indiana Shaw
Posts: 2
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Hi Mark - Welcome to yet another platform for your works -Looking forward to reading you thoughts - Kind regards - Indiana x x x
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7/24/2017 12:53:58 AM
Topic:
NEWBIE ON POETRYSOUP
alee Aliyana
Posts: 2
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I was conceived and raised in Nigeria (better believe it) a ton of my companions on the web-based social networking differs and I'm similar to what? You think Africans don't know how to compose? Essay Help Well Africans have awesome scholars and artists and shading is not a prerequisite to compose. Presently regardless of that (I'm very verbose), I've cooked around three ballads for now and you should beyond any doubt seek after additional as all I fancy are perusers and honest remarks.
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7/24/2017 12:50:55 AM
Topic:
Discovering Stories
alee Aliyana
Posts: 2
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Universes of creative energy and revelation open up once your tyke has gotten a handle on the rudiments of perusing. Write my Essay for me They're on the way to perusing autonomously and you can help ensure it's a fun travel. Stories are an awesome path into this. There's something for each youngster – from picture books to stories with parts, by means of rhyming experiences, tall tales and books loaded with fun realities.
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7/23/2017 10:22:25 PM
Topic:
confused
Jeremy F.
Posts: 2
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Hi! I'm new here! Can you guys help me strengthen my poem?
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7/23/2017 10:20:14 PM
Topic:
confused
Jeremy F.
Posts: 2
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confused,
But excited,
I followed form.
She studied my eyes
as I glared at hers,
Passion in her heart,
but fear in mine.
She wanted a kiss --
a gift I couldn't give,
a privilege I couldn't grant,
a path
that did not belong to me.
My mind was a paradox:
Infected with love
but cured by hate,
Burning with passion
but cooled by thought,
Riddled with emotion
but certain in position.
Time stood still
as the other children watched:
waiting,
anticipating,
demanding my response.
What was I to do?
I was hers,
but she wasn't mine.
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7/23/2017 12:04:28 PM
Topic:
NEWBIE ON POETRYSOUP
Favour Uchechukwu
Posts: 1
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So friends while surfing the net, I stumbled on this site and I've been going gaga with recipes for my soup-poetry. I have written poems and just started writing 29 December 2016 and have been writing since and it's been a thrilling experience. Well, I was born and brought up in Nigeria (yeah) a lot of my friends on the social media disagrees and I'm like what? You think Africans do not know how to write? Well Africans have great writers and poets and colour is not a requirement to write. Now all that aside (I'm quite verbose), I've cooked about three poems for today and you should sure hope for more as all I desire are readers and truthful comments. Thank you all in anticipation and thank you Poetrysoup for this very interesting idea to bring poets together
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7/23/2017 11:42:52 AM
Topic:
Tell me what you think.
Lewis Y. K
Posts: 1
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She
Written by
Lewis, Y.K
She comes in darkness, in the space where only the sound of a whisper can be heard. I love her. I, desire her. Remembering her landscape of muted hues of pinks and black intermingled, drawn in the shadows of my dreams into a pool, of which I want to drink of, submerging myself into.
My eyes gaze upon a scenic view that lingers in the darkness, shadows of the night being caught by the reflection of the gift that is before me. I’ve, stalked her. I’ve, wanted her. I’ve, wanted her to call my name. Call my name! Say, my name! I’ve wanted her over me. I’ve wanted her to make me her seat, I wanted her to nurse me from her breast flowing with the gift of life.
I’ve found her. This unsuspecting girl, who has my heart, but another I belong. She, knows nothing of me.My longing for the first embrace, the warmth of her mouth to mine, hearing her breathing deeply as I caress her. Smelling the perfume of her scent as it permeates deep within me. Imaging feeling the waters flowing over me as she softly calling my name. Saying my name.
She comes. She comes.
Only in the whisper of my mind.
She comes.
edited by klewis2001 on 7/23/2017
edited by klewis2001 on 7/23/2017
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7/23/2017 12:04:48 AM
Topic:
Your Enemies
Felice Bee
Posts: 1
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Please let me know what you think
***
[Your Enemies]
Let me cry the darkness from their eyes
Tease to unfold the scaffold of their lies
Ignite the strings of fear and stain
That bind their minds to guided hate
Let them see what I see
Your life as an open wound
Let them hear the sound of shattered glass
Stumble through to the profound
Let them look into their own eyes
Give them back their soul and mind
I will cradle them in their grief
As they dissolve in my arms at your feet
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7/22/2017 8:37:25 AM
Topic:
Notification
Terry Reeves
Posts: 1
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I am not being notified when someone comments on a comment I made about their posted poem. The PS system is supposed to email me as they do when someone comments on my poetry. This feature is not working for me. I don't understand why.
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7/21/2017 7:30:49 AM
Topic:
Have fun and keep PoetrySoup a haven.
Dave Timperley
Posts: 3
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I have just spent a very pleasant hour on the friends builder site only to have it marred by foul language that didn't add to the poetry presented. I have enough trouble with this sort of thing on Facebook. I do hope that The Soup is not going to open the floodgates as well.
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7/20/2017 2:07:29 PM
Topic:
Posting pictures from my laptop
Tiana Tolbert
Posts: 1
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I want to know to!!!!!!!!!
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7/20/2017 9:20:14 AM
Topic:
Let Loose Your Words of Critique
Tommy Allen
Posts: 1
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Give into pure thought, I'll entice you a spell,
Extracted from fear, fear my own hell.
The trees, they fall, the air, it drowns,
From beasts of skin, these earth-dwelling clowns.
Stuck in my mind,
Thoughts confined,
Of a life lived purely; a being redefined.
So I slip on my thought cap,
A brain full of tears,
To express all my feelings,
Few cheers - no cheers,
Jeers, the jeers.
The savagery of melancholy,
Befits of thee, a contrast to me!
Diluted eyes make everything fine,
Even through qualms,
Of spilled red wine.
If wine be thine own,
Yourself to condone,
For the seeds of pain already be sown.
No nature to blame,
Your soul to shame!
For life is more than only a game.
Blow your head off with solemn conviction,
Nought was heard save one conniption,
A cry to thy god,
A blatant ophidian.
A human unfit of a life coexistent,
Fear of slipping, running so distant.
Human, none of nature,
Just a foul spirit, a damnable creature.
O cruel confinement, I so wish I could live,
In a tale of nature,
True, righteous existence to give.
But such is the fate of all human being,
Of a life of eyes, prone to not seeing,
Seeing the pain of mother nature's tears,
For shame to you all,
You have become your own fears.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This is my first poem published to PoetrySoup. I'm searching for some harsh words to improve my works, and motivate me to create art in the realm of literature to the best of my ability. I am 15 years old and find English classes to be simple and disengaging.
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7/20/2017 3:16:31 AM
Topic:
(Film/Cartoon) Animated Poems
Milburn Aliff
Posts: 1
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Even I have the same issue, please help me the same.
generic viagra 100mg
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7/19/2017 1:58:22 AM
Topic:
Feedback on poem
key Keller
Posts: 5
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Thank you for your suggestions, Bob. They are much appreciated. I tried to space the poem as well but it stays up at the top for some reason..
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7/18/2017 2:52:02 PM
Topic:
Hosting a Contest
Kevin Shaw
Posts: 6
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Can anyone tell me how to host a poetry contest. I can't seem to find anything, thanks
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7/18/2017 9:46:37 AM
Topic:
Feedback on poem
Bob Atkinson
Posts: 210
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p { margin-bottom: 0.1in; line-height: 120%; }
Should I have known IT would all end like this?
All would BE dream but for THE miss of your kiss
THE dance THAT we shared in this transcendent dream
became all THAT IT WAS for all IT would seem,
but this WAS not simply ignorance that would serve as sweet bliss
No this WAS our minds finding bliss in a kiss
And now
I find myself, wanting
and those dreams forbid me wake
dreams THAT cannot be, become haunting
and while your memory dances
My heart aches
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