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I never knew what love was till you came
Didn't know it was an attachment till we met
Miracles happen just like dreams
Love happened just like magic

Slowly, I crawled into the world of love
Quickly, I became so attached
Unexpectedly, I found the magnetic one
Emotionally, I gave my all
Primitively, I became a beneficiary

First love they call it, I'll call it my first benefit
Just like a new being, the feeling was different
I enjoyed every moment
Ignorantly, I thought it was a casual-pleasant feeling
Not till I delved into the realm of emotions
and became a participant
It never made sense till it did
I've always envied lovers but I cherished mine

What can't be yours might be yours
Only if you will try

Why so fast?
You came so sudden and left hurriedly
I wanted us to have that happy ending together
I wanted us to experience all I ever wished for 
We were never meant to be together
Maybe we were just meant to have memories together

I never neglected my first love
Although I had a tender heart
And my feelings weren't strong enough 
Childishly, I drove my first love away
My feelings betrayed me, my emotions disappointed

Honestly, my first love was the only one till I found another
I had two worlds in my hands
One born out of ignorance, the other out of curiosity
Wanted a different future, yet clung to the present
Only wanted to take another
and have another different feeling
I placed myself in a conflicting situation
I was the one who betrayed our feelings
The feelings were sincere yet my actions were deceitful
I became the clown on my own stage

Just like that, it ended

The ignorantly sought love was lost
My curious world attachment left me also
If only I knew what curiosity will cause
I would have stayed ignorant and enjoy my first love.


Copyright © Helen Oke