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FOREVER GONE NO MORE

Haunted by loss-angst that once gripped my heart
I couldn't defy my soul's crying shout:
"My coin... down the storm drain... gone forever!"
Acquainting me with treasure-loss despair.

Missing first slot for scholarship-honour
I felt that "gone forever" was my chance
Torturing my mind as a young learner
Jeopardizing my aim to be on the top.

Academic failure brought forth sorrow
I equated to grand award loss
There down the storm drain of good future jobs
Midst exertion of my dead-level best.

When confronted with my Mom's "sudden death"
I found myself losing a dearest love
There down into the storm drain of grief panic
Making me feel helplessly pitiful.

On my Dad's victorious celestial flight
My spirit rejoiced, yet dread attacked me
There down in the storm drain of burial grounds
Where departure does welcome loneliness.

With my special child's grim diagnosis
Of progressing toward retrogression
I seemed to be pushed into the storm drain
Patiently waiting for a future loss.

For all these painful loss-experiences...
God has upheld me with His grace and love
Teaching that "gone forever" means "not end"
Since in Him is reigning eternal triumph*.
 
*2Corinthians 2:14 Now thanks be unto God, which always causeth us to triumph in Christ.    

March 20, 2019
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Copyright © Beata Agustin

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