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Stinky Pete Cooper - Poop

My neighbor, Pete, is very frustrated For two weeks he has been constipated Then, in Poetry Soup I heard him yell, "Whoop Whoop!" His laxative had been activated! He eats spicy food and lot of legumes Where he shows up, a gaseous cloud looms Pete is kinda kinky When he makes a stinky He likes breathing in his odorous fumes Beth's twenty years married to Pete Cooper When he didn't flush, she said a blooper Pete left a huge floater And now I will quote her, "Pete's poops always leave me in a stupor!" One time dumbass Pete clogged up his commode After his bowels dropped a giant load Beth called in a plumber Who was even dumber He just watched as the toilet overflowed Pete's a n a l gases continue to leak Can't stand being around them cause they reek When his farts are expelled I threaten a butt weld To solder it shut, Pete is such a freak! No one sits near Pete at the town meeting No friendly smiles does he get in greeting People are of like mind Beware of his behind When his flatulence keeps on repeating Beth's face becomes twisted into a scowl She told Pete that she's throwing him the towel Next time his fecal matter Is 'neath the lid in splatter She'll not clean his crap stains again. They're foul! She won't wash skid marks from his briefs either Nor cook bean casseroles for him neither Beth's taken a firm stand Gave Pete a reprimand She's hoping that soon he'll want to leave her

Copyright © Lin Lane

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Book: Shattered Sighs