Mad About Towns
When we set out on a road trip
We didn’t stick to the old script
And were gladly amazed
And rarely unfazed
Hitting strange towns though some were skipped
We started from Thatsnot, OK
Which was more or less ok
But then stayed for the view
When we drove into
The town of Overlo, OK
I had a painful relapse
From too hard to reach earwax
We got through Crac, KS
But stopped in Snac, KS
For some aspirin, drinks and snacks
We saw Lo, CO and Bo, CO
And then stopped for a cup of Joe
At a café in Sco, NE
And lastly in Pho, NE
To buy a phone since ours was too slow
Then we pulled over for a dish
Of the most fabulous fish
In a town called Tro, UT
Or was it in Cooko, UT
Nevertheless it was delish
We quickly saw Rap, ID
Felt embraced in Stup, ID
Loved the friendly
And the trendy
Ideal town of Envy, NV
We skipped to Wawa, WA
But skipped Akack, AK
For that was too far
And could not get the car
To tropical Low, HI, no way
Next up on the map was E, OR
Where sadly our stubborn four door
Had much tire trouble
From the sharp rubble
On the rough roads of Fourdo, OR
We passed Alpacas eating hay
Near the road, past Alpa, CA
And drove through their mess
In the city of, guess
You’re right, the town of Ca, CA
I would never recommend
Spending a long weekend
In Lazy, AZ
Nor Crazy, AZ
Which was just around the bend
Next we made it to Crowb, AR
And had drinks in the Pry Bar
But the best town by far
Along that stretch of tar
Was the aptly named Byf, AR
We then made it to Oohla, LA
Were we spent lots of moolah
Then we saw a bear cross
Though it looked quite lost
Near the wild town of Koa, LA
We were famished in Ha, MS
So we shopped for yummy yams
Plus some cheese and ham
And of course good jam
To go with seafood in Cla, MS
We loved driving through these states
I mean what else in life relates
And the funny town names
Out did trivial games
As this story well illustrates
But once we reached Can, AL
We slid right into a canal
And then we were towed
By a truck with a load
Of gators from Anim, AL
We stayed at the Grand Hotel
In the town of Ohwell, FL
Though it cost a large sum
We got to watch some
Football in nearby En, FL
My wife made a big to-do
When she got a small boo-boo
In Googooga, GA
Right next to Yo, GA
From slipping on pigeon doo doo
And we would never have seen
If not from all of the peeing
Hard to find Isee, NC
Unlike that Usee, SC
Where we drank too much caffeine
As stargazers we had to stop
Against a beautiful backdrop
In Superno, VA
Despite snobs from Di, VA
Who tried to hog that fine hill top
We then met well-dressed Wendy
Up the road in Emdee, MD
She seemed a specialist
And high-fashion stylist
Who was elegantly trendy
She said up north of DC
You’ve got to shop in Sue, DE
For cute leather goodies
And deals on chic hoodies
Plus good pie in Alamo, DE
We made sure to stay in our car
And avoided most of the bars
In the burg Thor, NY
Just up from Hor, NY
Chock full of sleazy two stars
We heard there was a Perfe, CT
But we couldn’t find that city
Nor was it a town
Though the busiest around
Was aptly called Defe, CT
Then we were totally surprised
On our journey when we realized
There’s a town Safa, RI
Next to Calama, RI
Which satisfied as advertised
It was oddly kind of a shame
Seeing a non-New England name
Titled Alaba, MA
Unlike old Grand, MA
Which for towns, was the grand dame
We loved the plainness of Sa, ME
Renowned for its permanency
Yet I found an excuse
To seek out some moose
With our journey to Excuse, ME
We went as far north and east
Or as far as I could at least
Although we felt blessed
We had to head west
And that need to head west increased
We first drove to old Grand, PA
To visit my long lost Pappa
Then stopped in Pap, PA
Where I was in awe
Beside the grave of my grandpa
Next we journeyed to Ohio
And got off track in Uh, OH
That got us annoyed
And we couldn’t avoid
Stepping foot in rural Poohpo, OH
On the highway we went straight down
And pulled into a smelly town
That’s called Stin, KY
Next to small Din, KY
Which was as tiny as it sounds
Going back north we then ate
At a Spanish joint in that state
In the town Spa, IN
Stayed the night in Ma, IN
Right off Main at the Super 8
Was it the thought of pastrami
Not too far away in Why, Wi
To drive through Ma, MI
Blow off Sala, MI
All on an empty tummy
We then headed back southward
Got stuck in a traffic herd
In of course Sna, IL
Had drinks in Cockta, IL
At some dive called The Blue Blurred
As we got closer to our condo
We had to first see a show
In the queer town of Ho, MO
Catch some great deals in Pro, MO
But frankly were real low on dough
We then met up with Silvia
In the town of Lyd, IA
Who got a disease
From more than a squeeze
When she stayed in Chlamyd, IA
We dropped off hitchhiker Brock
Who was suffering from shell shock
In nearby Pt, SD
Or was it El, SD
But we made him walk the last block
We almost got in one last jam
Within the river town of Da, MN
As the bridge was down
We’d be stuck in town
Except we did cross the new dam
The last state’s towns are trendy
Like Frie, ND and Tre, ND
And though we felt fried
We’re glad that our ride
Ended in good old E, ND!
Copyright ©
David Fisher
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