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Walls ana wails

WALLS AND WAILS

I am confined within these four walls
For far too long and pray a wall falls
And the guns jam with wardens asleep
As I take a walk of freedom, a leap
To a new world without guns and guards.

But I have fallen in love with my tiny bed
And my thin smelly blanket that I wed
I have loved the space here and the anger
I’m accustomed to the shouts of the hanger
I have dropped the last of tears and I wait.

I wait for nightfall to breakout in my dream 
And take a nature walk down the stream.
I will smell the silence of the waters cool
And in the moon light swim in the pool
My night dress- bikini, my gruel- martini.

I have loved the clacking sound of the chains.
I miss the stripes and long lasting pure pains
That accompany the whips swish sound.
Oh! they feel so nice true heaven found 
A cloud above other clouds closer to glory.

I have loved my everyday dress, it’s uniform.
The language is: to this place I conform.
Oh my! that metallic gate shuts so nice
Like gates of hell they shut loud thrice.
A Trinity they remind me and I pray.

I pray that I unlove this place and find a new
That loves back truly without a skew.
I petition for my mental, spiritual freedom.
This not who I am, an epitome of thralldom.
A coward, no, I am a fighter to the end.

A dove outside and an inner dragon
I’ve been petted enough in this bandwagon.
I’m fired up and will let it spew and to ashes burn
Whoever will burn for I want to take a good run
And a peaceful flight, to soar with eagles.

There’s no trophy for the most beaten woman.
No accolades for the most abused human.
Just tears that dry in wind and a coffin, a gift
From those that let me down to lift
As they mourn the lose of their faithful victim.

I refuse to play the victim in this film of horror.
I want the villainy role and erase them in honor.
I want to draw my sword last and do it fast.
After everyone is bloody tired, I’ll strike aghast.
No, not in vengeance nor fury but to act right.

To act right just like anyone cornered
Fights to defend their dignity honored.
I’ll stand, a machine gun, firing till egos fry
Till I earn back my life and rivers run dry.
I usurp my power to be just human.

Just human, with flesh and blood and a heart
with muscles that get weary and a soul that hurt.
A being with emotion and wants to smile
But can’t for their joy is enslaved for a while.
I’m human again for I slowly feel like it within.















Copyright © Irene Musila

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Book: Reflection on the Important Things