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Gloriously Luxuriating In Eternal Sleep

Gloriously luxuriating in eternal sleep

Forlorn; bereft of golden
(slippered) opportunities I weep;
Three score and four years
replete with mailer daemons,
hence mindset adrip
with self denouncing expletive filled bleep
unwritten expressed recriminations
wielded upon figurative head of wimpy blip;
decades elapsed at light speed clip
as the world turned days of mein kampf

exhibited slow psychologically
torturous analogous intravenous slow drip
during emerging adulthood 
approximately half life of mine,
when yours truly painstakingly
besotted with unrequited love
accursed extreme introvertedness
severely hobbled coping ability
gifted at birth with congenital weakness
mama's boy lacked ways and means
integrating himself among peers,

no supportive services to equip
shy lonely lad devoid of fellowship
palmar hyperhidrosis affected slippery grip
in tandem with being diminutive
aiming to experience childhood's end forever
son of a gun flailed with dating later in life
compromising, forsaking, and issuing
counter productively undermining
potential heterosexual relationships
invariably shooting from the hip.

Eight different prescription medications
allow umpteen combinations to yield
against bombardment that fate doth wield
delivered, signed and sealed
courtesy the grim reaper
able, eager, ready and willing
to maneuver across pitted minefield
accessing exiled soul whisking same
to idyllic place named Edenfield.

Oftimes methinks how cessation to breathe
spirit buoyed aloft, where garlands wreath
to escape hell on Earth,
where neurosis and psychosis seethe
within mine sixty plus shades of gray matter
symbiotically flourishing at expense of sanity
case in point being:
anxiety/ panic attacks
obsessive compulsive behavior,
schizoid personality disorder,

long in the tooth fellow
his sustenance similar to pablum
constituting imperial diet of worms
of the Holy Roman Empire -
called by Emperor Charles V
fit for grown baby,
especially when removing dentures
cuz he must resort to eat soft foods
unless by some miracle I teethe
for the second time.

Homegrown destructive force
muscles, tussles, wrestles,
et cetera within me
likened to (but separate from) Intifada,
(thus no insinuation this wordsmith
linkedin to any militant group)
grips mine soul asylum,
a recalcitrant doppelganger
within windmills of my mind
doth insidiously, poisonously,
and unpleasantly drum
palpably affecting writer
of these words to feel glum.

No respite whether I repose
in deep slumber or lightly awake
inescapable melancholic woes
haunts these lonely bones,
whereby system of the down 
houses reticent persona constituent feature
characterized courtesy anhedonia 
linkedin with passive suicidal ideation
accentuated when severe crisis erupt
analogous to smoldering volcano.

Fortunate for me the missus keenly aware
plus (despite every now and again
contention between us), 
she makes crystal clear
communicating her displeasure 
mixed with genuine fear
bantering deadpanning facetiously 
gallows humor I half heartedly asseverate 
gibberish spouting jargoneer
gravely alarms wife helpless to orienteer

conversation away from my demise, 
thus figuratively switch horses 
in mid stream and jockey 
to calm her down 
and lightening verbal exchange 
by undressing from the waist down 
revealing laughing stock of skinny legs 
(easily mistaken for spindleshanks)
poking thru underwear
charging on imaginary steed

feigning being loco
despite NOT smoking weed,
energetic cavorting courtesy 
nursing high test coffee, 
nevertheless ineffective battling fatigue 
despite flitting to and fro, 
hither and yon bumbling along 
(skeletal) joints of mine smoking hot 
suddenly after sipping strong brew, 
I temporarily shuck off lethargy 

long enough break to out dancing
while simultaneously overtaken 
to sing a song of sixpence 
while wings flutter at the speed of sound 
buzzfeed appetite for consumption 
Ecclesiastical History of the English People, 
one of our best-written sources 
for early English history 
authored by Venerable Bede.

Copyright © Matthew Harris

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