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bambooshoot - all messages by user

3/13/2012 2:41:09 PM
Hi There from Oregon Hey soupers - so glad I found this site. Been submitting since January and am finally getting past the post a poem link. Right now I'm writing haiku and some senryu - love the outdoors.

Any and all feed back - especially if it's " I don't get what you are saying" is much appreciated. Keep up all your good work!
6/11/2012 12:38:23 PM
Looking for a Critical Eye - Rain I am not comfortable with free verse - how can I improve?

Rain drops falling on the windowpane
Drenching, quenching earth'sthirst.
Caught by streams, flowing intorivers, rushing to the sea.
The river mouth kisses the saltydelta
Running to open water and carriedout to sea.

Pulled up by the heat of tropicalair,
A briny condensation forms.
Pushed by a powerful westerlyflow, colliding with the Costal range.
Clouds drop their gifts back ontothe glass
Rain water drops gently from thesky.
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