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Forum Home » High Critique » Artemis

For poets who want unrestricted constructive criticism. This is NOT a vanity workshop. If you do not want your poem seriously critiqued, do not post here. Constructive criticism only. PLEASE Only Post One Poem a Day!!!
1/29/2011 8:57:16 PM

Jan Camille Tongco
Posts: 3
I tread a boundless earth
The vines rush to adore my feet
Mistress of the rare I am
Up above canopies cover my stead

I tempt the winds, the tide
Even the sun knows not to tame me
Endless is my spirit wild
All around,
My minions look at me with awe
Oh how great they say I could be
Radiant and free

Yet my heart stops - leaps - throbs
Of something now I cannot be
Of something still I must then be
A fire unfelt, a well unfilled
How may then? How will then?
I know not still.
But this I feel

I look at the stars tonight and see
Gleaming diamonds of dwarfish light
Away and unsure but yet
I envy them.
Up there they are nothing compared to me.
They are hundreds while I
In solitude tonight am here
To cry - far away from sight
Beneath the darkness, beneath the bright
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