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The LAST Jewel in the Crown the 7th Sonnet - Debbie Guzzi's Blog

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Deborah Guzzi writes full time. Her third book, The Hurricane is available through Prolific Press. https://prolificpress.com/bookstore/prolific-books-c-12/the-hurricane-by-deborah-guzzi-p-151.html Her poetry appears in Allegro, Artificium, Shooter, & The Foxglove Journal in the UK, Subterranean Blue, Existere, The Ekphrastic Review, Scarlet Leaf Review & Subterranean Blue Poetry, Canada - Tincture, Australia - mgv2>publishing, France Cha: Asian Review, China - Vine Leaves Literary Journal, Australia - The Scarlet Leaf Review - Greece, Ribbons, pioneertown, Sounding Review, Bacopa Literary Review, The Aurorean, Liquid Imagination, The Tishman Review, Page & Spine & others in the USA. 


The LAST Jewel in the Crown the 7th Sonnet

Blog Posted:2/5/2014 10:16:00 AM

Crown of Sonnets,


The first line is repeated as the last line of the 7th. sonnet;
These will be MODERN SONNETS, 14 lines, 10 syllables per line

abab cdcd efef gg/ I want flow but strict meter is not necessary.
[we'll try 3 at a time & pick what works best] blend your writing style with Caleb's.

REMEMBER big Boy & Girl Pants On

1. Caleb
2. Charles Henderson
3. James Goff
4. Isaiah Zerbst
5. Roy Jerden
6. Carrie Richards, 
7. Eileen Ghali, Sarah Kendrick & Dane Ann Smith Johnson

Everyone who tries will rank 2nd, the 7 in the crown will get a first place.

Then if others want to write a sonnet till we get to 35 I will rank them 3- 10.


Stone in the Cold


#1 C. S.

Through the north woods I come, my bow in hand,
a man of stealth shadowed who can be bold.

My eyes hunt, take a reckon of the land,

look into the hollows, constant and cold.

My companion's solitude, still as stone.

I am the seeker of winds, and of scent,

by the trees yonder, I wait not alone;

my aim is true, and my purpose unbent.

Yet, death does not bring a smile to my lips,

nor a lift unto this wayfaring heart;

in grief I am fed, from silence I sip,

and from the old wood, I shall never part.

Caleb am I, a hunter true, and I pursue

a life that no death can ever undo.


#2 C. H.

A life that no death can ever undo,

for there are portals I've yet to find.

Hidden life in the green, I wish to pursue,

oh, the secrets of life and death entwine.

I search and search, I will know no defeat.

Each corner turned will find new paths to tread.

The deer or the bear, the fox that I meet

will reveal the secrets of life not death.

So, let the wood talk, hear what it reveals.

Riddle its meanings there to be understood.

The less armor worn, we brandish or wield,

higher truth follows our message of good.

Come into the woods as in days of youth,

we still face the test of absolute truth.


#3 J. G.

We still face the test of absolute truth,

the night's coming fast, I travel unheard.

The reverence I feel, was born in youth,

tempered by sage, burnt offerings for birds.

Tormented by brambles whose thorns I collect

I come to remains of struggles long gone,

feathers and crushed bone, on these I reflect.

I'm hoping once more, my arms are still strong.

A pine marten scurries, close to my step,

the sweet scent of birch gum, his claws unearth.

My arrow's still sheathed, for creeks I have leapt.

though I grow cold, my spirit is re-birthed.

Tracks at the creek, the water I savor

the brush moves, my aim must never waver.


#4 Isaiah Z

The brush moves, my aim must never waver;

with the strengthened arms, I bend my bow of yew:

my eyes pierce the brush, intent to savor

the sights of a good hunt, an arrow true.

The bracken parts, with rattling, empty sighs.

My draw fingers quake from the constant chill.

My quarries' breath floats to the clouded sky;

my own breath's muffled as I track my kill.

Overhead, an arrow in deadly arc

speeds toward the bear I'm seeking, still as stone;

a shadow moves, the arrow strikes its mark.

The hand that looses the shaft is not my own.

I am a man shadowed; death comes knocking:

The hunter hunted; the past comes a stalking.


#5 Roy

The hunter hunted, the past comes stalking

as three men in the high grasses arise.

Sworn enemies all, my skill they're mocking.

They wounded the bear; now they want the prize.

I load, I aim, I pull, my arrow flies

one enemy down, the others advance

I round the bear and turn toward their eyes

my buck knife out, I fight on in a trance.

My senses heightened, I exult in pain

So crisp each forest leaf and grassy blade.

So fresh the air, and wet each drop of rain.

Three are down and the bear lies in the glade.

A deathly still descends upon these lands.

Ahead, the bear in sudden motion stands.


#6 C. R.


Ahead, the bear in sudden motion stands.

with a surge of strength not fevered by fear

A force wells inside, I must take command

In grim confrontation, respect, I share.

The bear, uncontrolled, with impetuous roar:

smolders with passion, swings his bloody head

from thundering bellows his outrage soars

out through the woods into which he has fled.

I slip haphazard through deaths devious plan.

I kneel to the damp of crimson drenched ground.

My survival aided by my own two hands

I rise to face night as darkness surrounds.

The wild's full of creatures, stealthy and bold

I must build a shelter, to fight the cold.


Last sonnet, SONNET 7 Sara


I must build a shelter, to fight the cold.
Solitude coupled with loneliness fall
The need to survive musters up strength bold
Surveying surroundings demands my all

The chill of winter enters my heart's core
Fear wants to settle within my tired chest
There's a strong rock to shelter from the boars
Strength surges to my feet which seek their rest

Limbs, sticks, pine cones gathered to keep the flame
Jerky and trail mix feed hunger's desire
Rest tired soul your foe handled without shame
Dream of conquered foe while tending the fire

Dawn sends me on my way, a stronger man
Through the north woods I come, my bow in hand.  

Here is 1 way the downed men can be handled,

the ends can be tied & in many ways I'm sure.

#7

I must build a shelter, to fight the cold.
Still, out are the poachers who brought the fight.
Yonder smoke rises a joy to behold
a cabin with a blaze, warmth for the night.

Wolves howl on the wind, I think of the men
hoping they've all risen and left now
But glad to have gotten away from them
I lope toward the lit window aglow.

A door opens and I welcomed right in
my son had been searching for me, I'm told.
The heat of the fire, dry clothes from kin
an earnest call to the forest patrol.

With mornings light I report in as planned
Through the north woods I come, my bow in hand.



REMEMBER the action has come to a close we're taking him home.


Ok here's where we are; Caleb [who we have naked with a muffler, a bow quill, a buck knife & a fire starter -nice look by the way hubba hubba] in the North woods, there are ferns, thorns, birch trees, deer, bear, fox, & pine martins.

He only kills for FOOD. But, Roy has him in a self defense situation. 3 enemies are down [out of the fight for now - not sure if they are totally incapacitated, will revive, or dead] The bear is wounded. [We don't know if it's a mortal wound.] It's cold enough to see your breath [so like 32? degrees Fahrenheit] cold, wet. Since Jimbo did a burnt offering, he has matches - probably in his quiver? We don't know the time of day but to see shadows it is day.

so from verse 1-5 we had him stand, think, observe, load his bow, shoot down 1 man grab his buck knife [I guess he dropped the bow BUT the quiver is still attached to him] fight to incapacitate 2 more men around the body of a wounded bear & the bear alone REVIVES.

What does the naked hunter do now, what time of day is it? He must be freezing? hungry? thirsty? TIRED? and alone in the North woods. [Apparently he didn't get wounded at all during all this?] IT'S DARK ... HE NEEDS SHELTER OR A WAY OUT FAST

BE VERY SENSORY STAY IN FIRST PERSON PRESENT TENSE

STAY IN CHARACTER


The is Caleb, the place is simply the North woods, the man thinks...thinks.. he is being shadowed night is falling [how does he react to the night coming on when he thinks he is being shadowed?] no mention is made yet of how far from home he is or what his
supplies are, does he have a camp set up? does he have to set a camp up with dark coming on? He's too far in the woods to get home now before full dark. Is there an old hunters cabin or a hunters platform he can go to? where the water? What's he eating? Is he cold? Perhaps there is no shadow perhaps he has a fever mounting? [no fantasy or magic, a real person in real time, who hunts to put food on his table not for sport a woodsman who has hunted since he was a child]

ENJOY


Cyndi's Present to Caleb


Ahead, the bear in sudden motion stands…

Again we breathe and upon the earth spar,

I, Caleb, know how a night can expand

for I faced Ursa Major, far from stars.


Sagittarius and Libra lay still

and the mighty Centaur would rear no more,

but this bear lives on and forever will,

shining its white fangs in a soundless roar.


The woods were real and the rain I recall,

I morn for the loss of both flesh and bone,

even clouds are moved, even the moon crawls

But for all time I'm forbidden to roam.


Earth was mine; I damned each constellation

when ancient ones renamed me Orion.




Please Login to post a comment
Date: 2/6/2014 3:53:00 PM
No word from Dane Ann yet I may try to call her later. I am going to list the Contest as soon as we pick verse 7. Here's what I want you to do Title your Poem Stone Cold - Sonnet 1, Stone Cold, Sonnet 2 etc. for the folks would won the number one spots in the crown - for the sonnets not chosen for the Crown title Your Poems Stone Cold - Sonnet 2 Runner Up, Stone Cold - Sonnet 3 Runner Up [This way folks can READ THEM IN ORDER & ..... drumroll ;) oh I'm so smart LOL
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Johnson Avatar
Joyce Johnson
Date: 2/8/2014 11:06:00 PM
Am I a runner up #2 or 3? You must be very tired. Joyce
Macmillan Avatar
Cyndi Macmillan
Date: 2/6/2014 6:15:00 PM
I loved those books! They were fantasies, dungeons and dragons... adventure books..I'd try every avenue... much fun... great idea!
Guzzi Avatar
Debbie Guzzi
Date: 2/6/2014 3:55:00 PM
You can chose to read ANY version of verse 2, any version of verse 3 etc. and get a feeling for if they would have flowed better if we'd taken a different plot direction - there used to be kids book like this should be FUN!!
Date: 2/6/2014 12:17:00 PM
Amazing sonnets to accompany Caleb's poem. I feel dumb struck by all the talent we have on the Soup! I love the length of these verses; also greatly enjoythe gift write by Cyndi. A wonderfully clever idea, congratulations to you as well, Debs!
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Macmillan Avatar
Cyndi Macmillan
Date: 2/6/2014 6:28:00 PM
Thanks :D I managed to read through this... (long story)... I had a hard time with some of it, but most was fine. I may play with my sonnet, rework 90 percent and send it off...
Date: 2/6/2014 10:11:00 AM
Sara LOOOOVE your closing couplet!
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Date: 2/6/2014 9:53:00 AM
I'm going to start a pool, Bet. LOL.. I am fairly sure you'll never host another crown party... but I am laying odds you'll be teaching here on soup sometime in the next year... cause it's in your DNA... like when I wrote my sonnet for Caleb (yah, you called it. It was really ONLY for HIM) You'll say, nuh uh, never again...what deal with you lot? Pull out more hair? Oh, lol, but then you'll see a need, feel that "calling" and off you'll go... showing showing showing... or your head will blow up. LOL.. You know, the others are going to say, those two! Like watching the waltons on steroids. hugs!!!!!
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Date: 2/5/2014 8:51:00 PM
Don't know who did the last one for the crown, but it is pretty nice!
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Macmillan Avatar
Cyndi Macmillan
Date: 2/6/2014 9:48:00 AM
I'm looking forward to reading Sarah's as well and Dane Ann's... and I know that Bet is looking forward to a double shot of something other than from a gun and her feet up, eyes closed, icepack on her head, muttering, "never again." Until, of course, the next time she becomes inspired... and she will (Dee ducks. Duck Dee quack quack)
Goff Avatar
James Marshall Goff
Date: 2/6/2014 7:32:00 AM
the only thing i see...not that big a deal...the line....still out are the.....a bit rocky? hope no-ones upset by my analysis, i love you all!
Goff Avatar
James Marshall Goff
Date: 2/6/2014 7:29:00 AM
Yes!
Date: 2/5/2014 6:34:00 PM
Sarah is going to write ...
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Date: 2/5/2014 5:01:00 PM
Deb...Hi. I find this task daunting. I see the name of two others there with mine for this LAST SONNET. I gladly conceded to one of the other ladies. I haven't been following this because, to be honest....I have no killer instinct in me! I'm vegetarian, for crying out loud! ;) Also...as for survival instincts....nada. I get lost on my own. I will graciously bow out. Cop out? Perhaps...I think I'm way over my head on this one. Build a shelter....is he naked, is he not....bear all bloody...gruesome...he's hacked two people...Caleb...one of my fav guys? Too much of a stretch for my imagination. Sorry to disappoint you! Give me love and romance, and I'd be a real contender! Great work so far! :)
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Macmillan Avatar
Cyndi Macmillan
Date: 2/5/2014 7:55:00 PM
Eileen, check the contest page in about 3 hours. I have witnesses... lol... I see you my pretty, and your little dog, too. Love and Romance? Coming right atcha. Real contenders will be needed...
Guzzi Avatar
Debbie Guzzi
Date: 2/5/2014 6:03:00 PM
he's fought with three men, one was hit with an arrow 2 he fought with fist & knife, nothing says they're dead, they DOWN/stopped/unconscious, it's all over Eileen, now the hunter must leave to find shelter & return home - if you don't want to try fine, we'll miss and have missed the value of your input.
Date: 2/5/2014 3:20:00 PM
Somehow the summation is going to need to clear up why these men tried to hurt Caleb and why if this is real, not fantasy, he would kill men and then just go about his business... UM??? Editors call this a serious plot problem. What he wears, what he does with the bear, what the bird looks like means nothing unless THAT ONE QUESTION is resolved. Who are these men? What are they doing? And it was alluded by Roy that there was a "Deathly still" not a certainty, but it has given the impression that Our very own Caleb has hacked three guys in the woods... and it 1) isn't fantasy 2) IS our Caleb, a family man, who has been hunting since he was a child 3) Isn't a dream. THEN WHAT?
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Macmillan Avatar
Cyndi Macmillan
Date: 2/5/2014 4:41:00 PM
The hand that looses the shaft is not my own.
Macmillan Avatar
Cyndi Macmillan
Date: 2/5/2014 4:34:00 PM
No. Won't snap out of it, cause "it" is reality and "it" is what you are trying to seek, accuracy? An editor's perspective. You can't have three guys lying there and not answer why and what is going to happen with them. It is no longer about the bear.
Guzzi Avatar
Debbie Guzzi
Date: 2/5/2014 3:49:00 PM
SIS!!!!! snap out of it, the men are DOWN not necessarily dead. And hey blame the group they PICKED sonnet #5 - they would be dead if I didn't change the word to DOWN, I would say Roy felt & others may have felt they were the shadows, the deathly still is the QUIET because the men are passed out & before the bear comes to [they've scared off all the wildlife!] okies now Sis let us go on ...
Date: 2/5/2014 2:36:00 PM
Okies POETS , some misunderstandings CAUSE you are not reading MY blog [poke] in Roy's sonnet all three men are DOWN, one by an arrow 2 in the knife fight NOW - down is not necessarily dead BUT they are at least unconscious so the hunter can get away!
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Macmillan Avatar
Cyndi Macmillan
Date: 2/5/2014 3:12:00 PM
A deathly still
Guzzi Avatar
Debbie Guzzi
Date: 2/5/2014 2:37:00 PM
Sara may have more important things to do at home. She can deal with pressure right now so if she writes good if not we have 2.
Date: 2/5/2014 1:31:00 PM
Eileen, Sara, and Dane Anne are all up to the challenge, I'm sure of it! Good luck to them, and thanks Deb for all your hard work, ......you must feel as if you have been running through the woods with the poem-hunters after you!!!
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Hunter Avatar
Painted Hunter
Date: 2/5/2014 2:21:00 PM
Yep, I know it's been a lot of work. None better to take it on than Debbie, though.
Date: 2/5/2014 12:55:00 PM
this will have to draw the curtain down with some sense of closure, a resolution... bring it on!.. debbs, sent you soupy!
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Before Spring Came Narrativeadventure,animals,childho
Pledge Sonnetdevotion
Wild Cherries Free versedevotion,nature,nostalgia
Words From the Oracle Layallegory,philosophy
Science Free verse 
Mona Lisa Resembles Chokaart
And With Merriest Spirit Quintain (English)faith,father,holiday,insp
Cotton-Pickin' Paradise Versechildhood,life,nostalgia,
Where the Sycamore Grew Narrativeautumn,family,house,life,
Larks Free versedeath,devotion,imaginatio
Big Bang Limerickfunny,science,
Winter (Do Not Forget Among the Loss of Flowers) Me Free verse 
Let I do not know?loveme,me,
He Was Smoking Hot I do not know?funny
Alabaster Night Free versenature,planet,sea,
Haunted Orb Haikufantasy,nature
This Night Sonnet 
Tombstones & Teacups Rhymeallegory,childhood,death,
Today Not Tomorrow Free versededication,depression,gir
Years of the Rose Free verselost love,loveday,
The Joy That Sweetly Stays Free verse 
Cinder Girl Rhyme 
Biography (Thesis Statement) Versehistory,life,philosophyli
Figure Fusion Verseart,sports
Dancing Bird - With Video Link Free verseanimals,introspection,nat
Poem For a Sensuous Poet Free versefantasy,on writing and wo
The Road Walked Down Through the Years Rhymelife,on writing and words
The Iceman Cometh! Rhymenostalgia
He Says/ She Says Narrativelife
I'Ve Seen So Many Sonnetintrospectionnight,night,
Searching For Michelangelo Free verseart,hope,life,people,imag
Indifference Free verse 
Realisation of Self (War Child) Free verseme,me,
Reporting Live On the Soup (Colorado) Rhymefunnyme,me,,western,
Late At Night Lyricimaginationme,fear,me,
Reverencing Nature Balladfaith,naturenature,heart,
Dreams Coupletimagination
I Exist Pantoumintrospectionlife,me,
Madrid: Circa 1974 Blank versenostalgia,travel,
Magnolia Song Free verselove,romance,
Yellow Bus Roars Through Haikuallegory,nature,places
Ethel's Remedies Rhymefunny,people
A Dream In the Mist Narrativefantasy,imagination,natur
Volga 1 - 3 Prose Poetryfantasy
Mama's Cleaning Quatrainintrospection,life,mother
Waking Heart's Veins Free verseangst,hope,
Revelation Free verseimagination,lifesong,long
Sports Limerick Limerickfunny
The Snowflake Italian Sonnetromance,
Jack Lyricintrospectionlife,
The Ghost That Travels Far Personificationnature,
Kite Flying - Test Free verseallegory,art,imagination,
Dining With Crow Rhymeanimals
Beauty, Yes Sijohope,imagination,philosop
Smart and Final Prose Prose Poetrypeoplepeople,red,city,peo
Tiger In the Sea Rispettoadventure,animals,seame,t
A Song of Michael's Rose Narrativeme,
Where My True Love Lives - a Ballade Balladedeath,love,ocean,
Into Morning Free verselife
Play Me a Teardrop Rhymelost loveme,me,
Tickle Trout Narrativeadventure,food,
The Sweetest Song Sonnet 

Fav Poets

PoetCountry 
Carolyn Devonshire United States Flag United States Read
Carrie Richards United States Flag United States Read
Deirdre Omaidin Ireland Flag Ireland Read
Andrew Crisci United States Flag United States Read
Jim Fish United States Flag United States Read
Nigel Fawcett Italy Flag Italy Read
L'Nass Shango United States Flag United States Read
Andrea Dietrich United States Flag United States Read
Robert L. Hinshaw United States Flag United States Read
Nette Onclaud Philippines Flag Philippines Read
Sidney Beck Russian Federation Flag Russian Federation Read
Sammy Shaq Canada Flag Canada Read
Charlotte Puddifoot United Kingdom Flag United Kingdom Read
Cyndi Macmillan Canada Flag Canada Read
T Wignesan France Flag France Read
Elaine George Canada Flag Canada Read
Sharon Winter United States Flag United States Read
Michael Smith United States Flag United States Read
Jack Horne United Kingdom Flag United Kingdom Read
Paul Callus Malta Flag Malta Read
Charmaine Chircop Malta Flag Malta Read
James Marshall Goff United States Flag United States Read
Joann Grisetti United States Flag United States Read
Ravindra K Kapoor India Flag India Read
Olive Eloisa Guillermo - Fraser Philippines Flag Philippines Read
Kathryn Collins United States Flag United States Read
Michael Jordan United States Flag United States Read
Constance La France Canada Flag Canada Read

Book: Shattered Sighs