Reporting Live On the Soup (Colorado)

"Howdy to you all from Colorado! This is Cletus Schlunk reporting, Where gossip is fair and balanced and there is little or no distorting! It's the home of the Rockies, Broncos, Nuggets and potholes galore, And old mining towns like Leadville and Cripple Creek, full of western lore!" "Hordes of gaping tourists from all over come to visit the Centennial State, So I collared one to get his views and his comments to you I'll relate." "Sir, could you spare a few minutes of your time for a little chat? Tell me where you're from and where did you get that silly hat?" "Ah'm frum th' great state uv Texus an' that's a hunder'd dollar Stetson son. Now, don'tcha go a-makin' sport uv me - ah've cum here ta have a little fun!" "Be forewarned that when sipping a cool Coors, respect the altitude here." "Yup! Ah've figgered out that jes' one uv 'em will set ya' on yer rear!" "What do you think of our magnificent mountains reaching for the sky?" "Shucks! We used to have 'em in Texus an' they wuz nearly twice as high! But ah'm here ta tell ya', they wuz flattened out years an' years ago. That's why Texus is th' biggest state in the lower 48, I want ya'all ta know!" "Have you fished our pristine streams, many that are off the beaten track?" "Yup! Caught a 30-incher - he wuz a Texus minner so I throwed 'im back!" "Well, folks, he out-bragged me so I brought the interview to a hasty cease! Till next time, from Colorful Colorado, I wish each of you happiness and peace! Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired © All Rights Reserved Placed No. 2 in the "Reporting Live On The Soup" Contest - July 2010