Ma Bitches - the Camel and Me

MA "BITCHES" - THE CAMEL AND ME . . . Ma “Bitches” rang - a “Nite” on the “Toon” - how are you fixed . . . ? “Aye” - “I’ll bring “Lovely Eyes” the camel - we’ll have some kicks . . . Me and the camel - got all tarted up - ready to put on a show . . . Met the “Bitches” at the corner - jumped on the camel ready to go . . . There is “Nowt” better than a camel - to give you all a free ride . . . With all knickers a show - we all clung to the camels’ humpy hide . . . We all got to the night club - then we all got to jump the queue . . . As “Lovely Eyes” the camel - battered his eyes at the bouncer in lieu . . . ; ) Once at the bar - we downed the cocktails - the camel a few jars . . . The barman eyed the camel - any dumpers from you - you’re barred . . . Now all legless - onto the dance floor with our hand bags we arrived . . . Seems once this happened - “Lovely Eyes” - decided to then come alive . . . “Man” you’ve never seen a camel strut his stuff so much - twaz cool . . . “But” with pure indignation - as to all other’s that he covered in drool . . . All was forgot - as we all got in line - to dance to the “Egyptian walk” . . . “Aye” soon ma “Bitches” - the camel and me - were all the night club talk . . . As the night simmered down - and we all ended up outside on the street . . . When the thought of a greasy kebab and chips - sounded to us just neat . . . We were stood in the queue for ages - the poor camel had started to slaver . . . With a whole load of curse's - everyone in front started running for cover . . . “Kebabs” & chips in hand - down the street with the camel we staggered . . . To the shouts “Oi” - nice camel you got there - any chance we can bag her . . . ? “Lovely Eyes” indigent as he wasn’t a she - then ran up and spat in his eye . . . “Oi” alright “Lad” - as we stood wetting our knickers as in laughter we cried . . . You think getting upon a camel was hard sober - then you should try after . . . One of ma “Bitches” fell off - we couldn’t be bothered - so we just left her . . . “Aye” ma “Bitches” - the camel and me - “Nite” on the “Toon” was rite grand . . . Even better when you have a camel such as “Lovely Eyes” as a taxi to hand . . . ; ) Indiana Shaw . . .