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How Fast it Dries

the jaguar's tear
slides off his single whisker
clouds do sigh

three offspring
dragged into the river's teeth
one remains

they both stretch
the moment of sorrow lost
life leaps on

Copyright © | Year Posted 2014




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Date: 4/14/2016 1:04:00 AM
Very astutely worded, Laura. This was both tender-hearted as well as sad, and the images of the jaguar and the river are very clear in my mind's eye. I think this was one of your more immersive haiku collages ... and even the title has much room for thought. Should I be happy that sorrow passes quickly, or sad that the lost cub was so easily forgotten? I'm not sure ... and I think that's a sign of engaging poetry, where the emotions aren't so black and white. Great write!
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Laura Breidenthal
Date: 4/14/2016 6:21:00 PM
This one in particular means a lot to me, so thanks for taking the time to read it. I love your feedback - you're so thoughtful and you have an analytical mind..I always look forward to your input! <3~Laura
Date: 5/22/2015 11:17:00 AM
You have a genuine talent. Don't waste your time on mine but I will draw inspiration from yours.
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Laura Breidenthal
Date: 5/23/2015 12:52:00 AM
Awwwhh, Michael thank you for the encouragement. I'm sure you've got some great poetry! ~Laura
Date: 11/14/2014 8:31:00 PM
short memories play nicely into nature's amorality...nicely written Laura
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Date: 11/14/2014 6:58:00 PM
This is simply brilliant. I wish I had an ounce of your talent! You slay me as always. ~Kilmer
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Date: 10/16/2014 8:21:00 PM
What agile articulation of life's remorseless profress Laura. I can see the creatures and river do clearly, I've internalized the ruthless beauty of your vision and moral, it is profound, with amazing brevity too! I revere wild cats,all cats, so this write with its emotions,wild feline infanticide, and beautifully violent yet coexisting conclusion is very memorable.I register this as an intellectual and stylistic masterpiece. Your recent comments have uplifted me!Your avatar,patient beauty! JAB.
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Date: 10/13/2014 8:40:00 PM
i like the style you drew this excellent pen
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Date: 10/11/2014 8:22:00 AM
Now how did I know that would be your favorite cat (Big and black)? The forces of nature can at times appear cruel. We, with our technological society and reason think that we are above it all, but that is far from the truth. Wishing you well. You are an amazing poet! Perhaps the cats are smarter than we are.
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Laura Breidenthal
Date: 10/11/2014 9:16:00 PM
Black and small too, my great friend Duke! :) Have a cat named Spy; he's my sweet miniature panther. I love him to death. Thank you so much for the compliment. You have made my evening ten times better! Your verses are clever and well thought out. I admire you as a poet very much. ~Laura
Date: 10/10/2014 11:50:00 PM
Wetting eyes.
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