Captains log star date twenty eighteen
Captain’s log star date 1624
The cam belt’s gone and snapped
on the Star-ship Enterprise.
The valves and the pistons
have gotten bent inside.
We suddenly lost transmission.
We heard this big-bang sound.
We put the stick in neutral and now we’re
floating upside down.
Scotty scratched his head.
Was not sure what to do.
There must be a mechanic
somewhere in the crew.
Spock raised his eyebrow.
His pointy ears went red.
We need to fix this problem
or soon we’ll all be dead.
Pavel Andreievich Chekov
who can’t pronounce his v’s
said “We cannot nawigate the ship”
we need a compass, please
Uhura made a phone call
to the RAC
“We’ve broken down in outer space
Where no man has ever been”.................before (I know!)
What’s is you exact location?
We really need to know.
“We’ve broken down in delta 4
where no man’s gone before”...............(That’s better)
The mechanic arrived on time
In his shuttle craft, he
wore thick woolly jumpers
which made the crew all laugh
He placed the jack under the star-ship
Pumped the handle with his hands
Lowered the ship onto the jacking points
And then he rubbed his hands. ( cos it’s bloody cold in space.)
With a ratchet in his hand
And a torch wrench in his pocket
A set of left handed screwdrivers
And a metal box with sockets
A new cam belt was fitted
It didn’t take too long
Checkov said it’s werry good
Spock’s ears are very long............ (Yes I know!)
The mechanic said it’s all done now
The rods and cams are turning
Don’t leave it so long next time
Or your engine might start burning
Copyright © The Bored Bard | Year Posted 2018