As a Child

As A Child I clung to you tightly oblivious to the depts of your destitution I couldn't comprehend all the screaming and shouting but I knew it wasn't right. One always left and the other remained in darkness holding me tightly as if I was the cause of your damnation and still your sole comfort I cried because it was all I could do I cried because these words were trapped within my mind I cried because you fought desperately not to do so in my presenece I cried for you As A Child I saw how desperation eats away at the soul how love equates to hate in the face of want I watched you grow old in body mind and spirit weary from a life of hardship were nothing changed I recall your youthful shimmering gaze through those eyes I first saw myself Now your eyes are clouded with lines of vermilion lines which seem to span the contours of your face As A Child I would dance run and laugh the loudest just so you could see why I did this back then I couldn't understand Now I can see that sorrow runs deep it was penance for the sin of my birth I felt guilty from your love though I knew it was never your intent. I Am Full Grown Now with a child of my own I lay here with the world on my mind sadness in my heart and the child on my chest and pray this child will not be subject to my brokness and will never think or feel the way I did As A Child