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Character Trait Anxiety

The character trait I'm portraying is not those mentioned. It's the running narrative anxiety causes. The secondary comments are lifted from things my friends say. So somewhere in-between is maybe the more accurate picture. I'm not sure how other people deal with anxiety but I argue with it and try and just push through, but it doesn't go away regardless of how I act on the outside. Sorry it's long... If it wasn't I'd write the after verse to the positive comments, the 'feel good' followed by the 'what if' followed by the slump. I have nothing to offer Dragging everyone down Why did I come out With my miserable frown She brings fun and daring Lights up the place Elevates the jokes She's ours and she's ace I'm being too weird Doing my own head in Why can't I act normal I need putting in the bin I love how you spin things See things differently That's just too funny You're making me pee! I've said too much I've crossed the line Just say what's expected Reply with 'I'm fine' I'm glad you spoke It made my day I shared it with my family You helped take some hurt away I'm embarrassing myself Why do I continue to speak Everyone knows more than me My contribution is weak Excellent thoughts I agree with everything you've said I'm glad of your insights You've clearly thought ahead The way I look, the way I act I'm so ashamed and scared I just wish I was normal I don't fare well compared The way you look, the way you act Unapologetically completely you I stand in admiration I wish I could do what you can do I wake up screaming Thinking there's something I forgot Worried I'm nothing Everything will go to pot You remember everything My Rolodex mate You remember details I've forgot See how things correlate I'm missing cues Just an awkward fool How can they stand me I'm breaching a golden rule You're emotionally intelligent Your worth you don't know You're kind and you're caring Your love you show I'm interfering By giving my view I need to stay out of it They can work it through What a problem solver! You know what to do You eloquently reframe I don't know how to thank you I bet everyone wants to ditch me Kick me into touch I'm just so difficult to know They can't like me much Here's the advance date I really hope you're there Let's travel together You're unique, we love your flair Character Traits Poetry Contest 20th April 2023 Sponsored by: Angela Tune

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Hat Bueckert

Date: 4/20/2023 2:20:00 PM

Very well done, to appreciate and take it easy on yourself is a good idea but easier said than done. A familiar inner voice that's hard to quiet down (but hopefully will start listening). They can be so damn critical and stubborn. This illustrates the battle quite accurately

Di11y Da11y
Date: 4/20/2023 2:31:00 PM

Thanks Hat, it's not something I've ever really tried to explain before or even recognised as anxiety until recently. I am questioning it more but I do think it's just part of me that I'll have to adapt around. Thank you for your kind words

Daniel Turner

Date: 4/20/2023 8:39:00 AM

Humility is one thing but self degredation is not humility. How can anyone love another, if they do not first love themself? You magnify your flaws which only makes them harder to mend, in your eyes. There's nothing wrong with you, DD. However, it never hurts to give oneself a good talking to:) It's all good:)

Di11y Da11y
Date: 4/20/2023 8:56:00 AM

It's not purposeful - so it's hard to claw out of by deciding I'll behave differently. I do behave differently I suppose, it's thinking differently that is the challenge. I can objectively draw conclusions from all the facts that support there's no reason to think like this. I've proved over and over it's not true but there's this element that doesn't listen. Even the simplest of things I do has a narrative running telling me it's wrong or if it's right then I'm perhaps too full of myself. It's definitely not big and not clever and I should indeed have a word.

Speaks Volumes

Date: 4/20/2023 4:21:00 AM

I am reading of two different people. The Dilly thinks little of herself and drags HERSELF DOWN, The Dally is what others see. The perspective they have is of a fun loving, self-assured with leadership and problem solving abilities. She is stylish and intelligent and a pleasure to know and be around. Her alter ego, poor Dilly, sees herself an frumpy and not much good for anything. What she has to realise is that others see more of us that we see of ourselves. A brilliant poem DD