I Nearly Killed a Celebrity, Once Upon a Time - Just That Archaic Poet's Blog

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I Nearly Killed a Celebrity, Once Upon a Time


Blog Posted:11/3/2013 12:30:00 PM

It was an accident! Swear to God; my hand on a stack of
Bibles: I didn’t mean to do it. Negligence would not have been a strong defense
had I actually killed him, though. Technically, I suppose, it would have only
been a charge of “manslaughter” since it was totally unintentional, and
considering I was just 14 at the time, hopefully the court would have had mercy
and shown me leniency, even if the rest of the world may have wanted my head on
that proverbial “silver platter”.  Now,
allow me to regale you about the time I nearly killed a celebrity…

My dad and his best friend Gary (a real estate agent) had
been frequenting “The Grapevine” in Lexington, Kentucky (their favorite
watering-hole and bar haunt) for some time when they met him. This was some
time before he was became famous and made his millions. John Michael Montgomery
was a regular performer at “The Grapevine” before he was discovered; he had befriended
my dad and Gary and they were all 3 good chums by the time John Michael was
signed to Atlantic records. You may recall some of his number one hits from the
early 90’s: “I Swear”, “Sold”, “I Can Love You Like That”, “Be My Baby Tonight”
(among others). Those of you reading who are unfamiliar with country music may
have no idea of whom I am speaking, but those of you who are country music fans
should be right along with me.

Being a native of Kentucky and nouveau
riche
millionaire, John
Michael wanted to buy some prime property in rural Clark Co. (where my family
and Gary lived), and Gary, being a real estate agent, was the first person JM
(I shall from here on refer to John Michael as “JM” in short) called up. So one
bright, sunny afternoon, my dad, Gary, JM and I all went to look at property
around Clark Co. In order to get a better look at the different locations, we
brought along two 4-wheelers with us: one for JM and one for me while dad and
Gary rode in dad’s huge pickup truck.

So there we were, riding and tooling around in rural farm
country, having a blast checking everything out. It was the first time I had
met JM and he, despite his new found celebrity status, was really just a
regular, down-to-earth kind of guy; friendly as could be and funny as hell. So
there I was riding around on 4-wheelers with this country music celebrity and
of course, I couldn’t help but to feel fortunate and like some important person
(insert a LOL here!), like a part of his entourage. This feeling of awesomeness
was not to last long, however, for
soon near tragedy ensued.

In the pickup, dad and Gary were driving well in front of us
on this rough, gravel road and JM was a good distance behind surveying the
land, and I was just a bit farther behind him, also taking in the scenery and
surroundings. I don’t know why, but dad suddenly slammed on his brakes, and
this is where things got chaotic and frightening.

So dad slammed on his brakes and JM stopped a few feet
behind the truck. I, on the other hand, was paying no attention whatsoever. I
was just riding along full-throttle speeding ahead, like I said, just taking in
the ambiance and atmosphere when WHAM! I slammed right into the back of JM’s
4-wheeler which lunged up and smashed into the tail-gate of the truck. Don’t
ask me how, but I managed defy physics and remain seated on my vehicle while
poor JM went flying through the air and landed roughly head-first on the
gravelly, rocky terrain. Absolutely horror-stricken, dad and Gary bailed out of
the truck and I jumped off my 4-wheeler and the 3 of us rushed over to JM who
was totally unconscious. Of course, we all were terrified that I had just
killed John Michael Montgomery, the up-and-coming superstar of the country
music world! For what seemed like an eternity, JM just lay completely still and
didn’t move a muscle. In retrospect, we must have all been in shock, not
knowing what to do, but after a minute or so, JM moaned and his eyes fluttered
open, much to everyone’s relief. Except for some bumps and a scratch or two, he
was no worse for the wear and after he finally roused himself, even started
making jokes about it. Dad’s tailgate, however, was bent all to hell.

Later on in the evening, we all went back to my parent’s
house where mom had just finished frying some chicken for supper, and before he
left, JM ate a drumstick in our kitchen. After that, we didn’t see JM much
anymore since he was busy touring and in the studio. I like to think of this
anecdote as the time I nearly killed (or severely maimed) a celebrity, and it’s
one of my few claims to fame (insert another LOL! here.) Hope you enjoyed
reading this true tale of terror (just kidding about the “terror”, but it is
100% true.) I, Chan Hurst aka “JustThatArchaicPoet” nearly killed a celebrity once
upon a time, many years ago! (Curtain falls.)



Please Login to post a comment
Date: 12/23/2013 8:52:00 PM
Wow!!! What a story! Been reading some of your blogs. You're such a passionate writer and you're really entertaining to read. Always, Laura
Login to Reply
Date: 11/3/2013 4:51:00 PM
Holy smokes. I'll bet he will never forget you. I remember when he was new to the country music scene. Glad you didn't maim his good looks!
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That Archaic Poet Avatar
Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 11/4/2013 8:41:00 AM
lol Me, too, K! Thanks for reading. This one seems to be a dud!

My Past Blog Posts

 
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My Pentagram Art; let me know what you think! :) ~Chan
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Click for a Surprise...!?
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Collage Art: Warning, May Be Offensive!
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More Visual Poetry: Collage Art
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IT'S A TRAP!!!!!
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UP IN SMOKE! VISUAL POETRY! IN YOUR FACE, BISHES!
Date Posted: 11/12/2013 5:14:00 AM
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Date Posted: 11/5/2013 4:54:00 PM

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Date PostedPoemTitleFormCategories
8/9/2014 Grey Area Rhymedark,truth,world,
8/9/2014 The Plot Thickens Rhymegod,judgement,life,truth,
8/9/2014 Glossophobic Light Poetryfear,world,
8/9/2014 Only God Knows and Time Will Tell Rhymechange,god,time,
4/3/2014 Anti-Psychotic Rhymepain,
3/22/2014 Science Friction Rhymespace,stars,
3/21/2014 An Exercise in Versatility Versepoetry,self,
3/19/2014 Pas de Deux Rhymelove,
3/18/2014 Do Not Read and Operate Heavy Machinery or Equipment Rhymedream,heart,poems,
3/6/2014 Inder the Unfluence Coupletdrink,humor,wine,
2/20/2014 Psychomanteum Rhymeheart,spiritual,
2/19/2014 Rosetta I do not know?confusion,nonsense,
2/19/2014 What's Weighing Heavy on My Heart Rhymelost love,
2/17/2014 She Sold Her Soul in a Bathroom Mirror Rhymeevil,satire,woman,
2/12/2014 The Last Son Rhymeart,truth,winter,
2/11/2014 What Gets On My Nerves Narrativeanger,angst,how i feel,
2/10/2014 Surgical Blue Free versehealth,me,satire,
2/8/2014 Restless Natives Sonnetboat,journey,ocean,
2/7/2014 Casting Couch Sonnetart,god,life,
2/5/2014 Hemlock Valentine Rhymedeath,fire,grave,heart,lo
2/4/2014 Veracious Vainglorious Vivacious Vixen: Very Virtuous, Very Vicious Rhymebeauty,woman,
2/1/2014 I'm Gonna Need a Transplant Rhymeabuse,addiction,drink,
1/31/2014 Assault and Pepper Rhymehow i feel,
1/28/2014 Bionic Betty: Another True Tale from the Mental Ward Narrativecrazy,woman,
1/26/2014 Nothing's New Rhymefun,morning,poems,sun,wom
1/25/2014 Memoir: Crashing Women's Studies- Feminists, BEWARE lol Narrativeart,funny,poetry,social,w
1/25/2014 Social Climber Rhymedeath,father,heaven,money
1/24/2014 Rubicons and Oubliettes Rhymeemotions,feelings,
1/23/2014 Water Brothers Rhymebeauty,brother,death,wate
1/7/2014 Poking the Beast Rhymeanger,fire,violence,
1/6/2014 Humble Pie, Anyone Prosehow i feel,introspection,
1/1/2014 Room Service Lyriclust,romance,sexy,
12/31/2013 One-Trick-Pony Rhyme 
12/18/2013 The Fool Rhymebaby,fun,horse,humorous,m
12/18/2013 Coming Clean Narrativeanger,conflict,introspect
12/17/2013 Perfectly Terrible Rhymeanger,beautiful,conflict,
12/3/2013 Paper-Cup Porsche: True Tale from the Mental Ward Narrativeblack african american,cr
12/3/2013 Gardens Grey Rhymebeauty,celebrity,characte
12/2/2013 Darth Exactitude Rhymecharacter,fantasy,star,wa
12/1/2013 All We Have is Hope Free versecancer,conflict,hope,how
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11/28/2013 Twice the Christ Rhymechristian,death,god,humor
11/21/2013 I Think of You More Than You Think I Do Light Poetryheart,husband,i love you,
11/20/2013 Love is a Lie Rhymegod,heart,love,love hurts
11/11/2013 Have My Cake and Eat It, Too Rhymecrazy,future,self,vanity,
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My Photos


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William part 2 Balladeblack african american,gr
Bending Backward Ballad 
Popcorn Music Rhyme 
Rhyme Master Couplet 
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Come Sit by My Side Tail-rhymefor her,marriage,moving o
Dreaming Couplethumor,humorous,poets,
Shocks Of Electrifying Emotion Rhymelove,romantic,
A Dedication To The Man Rhymededication,friendship,
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Danesh Morgan Singapore Flag Singapore Read
Kelly Deschler United States Flag United States Read
Mustapha Mohammed Trinidad and Tobago Flag Trinidad and Tobago Read
Joseph Matose Zimbabwe Flag Zimbabwe Read
James Marshall Goff United States Flag United States Read
Mark Peterson United States Flag United States Read
robin davis United States Flag United States Read
Laura Breidenthal United States Flag United States Read
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