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Coming Clean

It's time to come clean, to own up and admit to my mistakes, misbehavior, and machinations. I joked about "plotting" and "ousting" people, and the joke went way too far because it was taken literally and seriously, as if I actually possessed the power to exile someone from the site. You know what? That was wrong, and in the process, I hurt a lot of people and I have been responsible and at the center of much of the drama that has plagued the site for the past week or so. My behavior helped to warp our haven, and I have been wrong on so many levels; I admit it. 

I am taking responsibility for my actions. I've talked smack about people behind their back; a lot of us have; let's just admit it: it DOES go on. I am guilty of it. The feuding must stop for the sake of peace and harmony. We don't have to all hold hands and sing kumbaya, but we can stand united beside one another and put our differences aside. I'm airing out all my dirty laundry here. I am owning my fault and guilt and apologizing to the people I hurt; to make amends is the only thing I know, and one thing that AA has taught me.

It would make me happy if we all come clean, admit our mistakes and make amends. I am just as guilty as some others; I'm curious if they, too, will come clean.

I've been wrong on so many levels it's not funny, literally. I'm not a bad person, but I have made big mistakes and I am here to apologize, sincerely. No more fighting or bad-mouthing. Let's all concentrate on producing great poetry instead of feuding. All I want is peace and serenity.

Again, I take full responsibility for my wrongful actions. I ask for your forgiveness and for your patience. This is a most trying and taxing time in my life. I battle addiction and the symptoms of my mental illnesses, all day, everyday. I have Borderline Disorder; look it up. It's a terrible affliction. I'm not going to blame my errors and poor decisions on my illnesses or my father's kidney cancer. They were just catalysts that brought out the worst emotions in me and I took my fear and anger out on mostly undeserving people (some deserved to be verbally eviscerated, though, and I make no apologies for that). But I do apologize for all my mistakes and bad behavior.

Again, let's all just put our differences aside and focus on our artistry. The Soup is about poetry and fellowship, not feuding and fighting. Let's have peace and harmony, for the sake of all. Thanks for listening. ~ Chan

Copyright © Just That Archaic Poet | Year Posted 2013

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Robin Davis Date: 12/20/2013 8:50:00 AM Chan The Man This is a wonderful piece you have written. There is no need for anyone to fight or debate over little things. There are bigger problems in the world than grown adults acting like children. As you stated, the soup is like a second family so lets all be kind and get along, keeping this site friendly and sweet. Thanks for the great and awesome comment on my Inner Kindness poem. Love and Hugs Sweet Pea Login to Reply Just That Archaic Poet Date: 12/20/2013 9:09:00 AM Much agreed; thanks, Sweet Pea :)

Poet Destroyer A Date: 12/18/2013 2:16:00 PM Thank you Chan, we can all take a lesson from you. I for one am happy you are part of this poetry soup group. I was not expecting you to post this. You are right, your loving fans Skat and I were hurt. We both are sorry, for reacting on every blog lashed out that day. But, I know out of every soul here on the soup you are the only one who understands why we had a reason to be mad or sad. I mean it is not fair, for one poet to only give you credit by saying you did nothing wrong for standing up for yourself. We expect that from certain poets around here. Like you I apologized for letting it bother me. Sorry I lashed out and took it out on all my soup friends. Who are still driving me crazy through soup mail. ((Lol -it's a good crazy)) Stay Xool... Linda Login to Reply Just That Archaic Poet Date: 12/18/2013 3:32:00 PM *oops, should say *so mad at myself. I hate typos! Just That Archaic Poet Date: 12/18/2013 3:31:00 PM Thanks, Linda. I appreciate your thoughtful and heartfelt response. You all had every reason to react the way you did. I was mean and callous and scathing and I am no mad at myself right now for letting this whole debacle happen in the first place, but something good came out of it: resolution. We now have a sense of peace, at least between you and I :)