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Contemptible Humans!!!!! - Just That Archaic Poet's Blog

About Just That Archaic Poet
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Contemptible Humans!!!!!

Blog Posted:11/2/2013 9:45:00 AM

Delight, I do, in knocking things off the shelf, just for
the fun of it- simply for my own amusement. Why are you yelling at me? How was
I to know it would break and cause such a mess? It’s your fault, after all, for
putting it there in the first place. Really, you should have known better. How
do you expect me to fight instinct; to battle such an irresistible temptation?
Is that not what they refer to as an “exercise in futility”?

A short time later, here I am reposed on my comfy cushion,
when you dare interrupt one of my many daily naps by procuring that damnable
spherical thing which you haphazardly throw around for those contemptible canines
to chase. Inevitably, they always
crash into me with their wild chase, totally disrupting my peace and serenity.
A mad dash I must make to escape unscathed, and find a new resting spot, away
from all the chaos and discord you and those fiendish dogs unleash (no pun
intended). Have you no respect? What, is this your idea of some type of retribution
for my prior “transgression”? What you label as “mischief” I simply refer to as
“nature”. It’s a question of semantics, frankly.

What are you bellowing about now? Oh, that. Well, you see, I wanted a perfectly clear view of those fascinating
winged creatures fluttering about outside, and the…”blinds” (is that what you
called them?), well, they unfortunately got in my way, and I couldn’t have them
obstructing my line of sight, could I? Again, it’s entirely your fault for having them there to
begin with; you should be scolding yourself, not me.

I see you have forgotten all the favors I have done for you over
the past few years! Who, exactly, would have caught that nosy, noisy,
nettlesome mouse poking his little whiskered snout in practically every corner
of the house? Were you going to handle
the matter? Ha! I think not. And you even had the gall, the colossal nerve to
scream when you found his carcass at the foot of the bed! I’m glad you had the
good sense to at least praise me for the kill after you calmed down. Yes, I am a good kitty. You didn’t really
expect those mangy mutts to dispose of the vermin, did you? They’re good for
nothing and I cannot, for the nine lives of me, fathom why you keep them around. Those simpering canines-
tails wagging perpetually…and YOU! Encouraging them with your constant chant of
“Good boys! Gooooood boys!” What is
that anyway; your mantra or other
such nonsense?

What about me? Do I not curl up with you at night? Granted,
it’s for the body heat (to be honest with you), but still, I’m there, aren’t I?
Don’t I deserve to be fawned over as much as those idiotic dogs? Ok, well, I do
admit; you do give the best back
scratches, and I do enjoy it when you scratch my head and behind my ears. I
suppose you are good for something. Yes,
yes; I know: you do provide yummy treats and you do procure for me tasty meals.
Perhaps I am somewhat indebted to you
for all that. Not to mention, that magic wand of yours that miraculously cleans
my litter box; I don’t know how you do it.

You humans are curious creatures,
indeed! Contemptible at times- even annoying, but you do have your uses. Now,
excuse me, if you will: I’ve yet another nap to take, and please, for the poems/love'>love
of tuna, make those despicable, disorderly dogs lie down and leave me in peace! And you, go
watch that big box with all the flashes and movement and keep out of my
whiskers, if you would be so kind!

Please Login to post a comment
Date: 12/26/2013 10:39:00 AM
This is so cute! I love it! Augh...still strying to think of what to write for your contest! Hehe. Always, Laura
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That Archaic Poet Avatar
Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 12/31/2013 9:45:00 PM
Thank you, Laura :)
Date: 11/4/2013 4:55:00 PM
Very charming! I have never read anything like this before, written from the cat's perspective! I enjoyed it thoroughly! Wouldn't it be great if they could talk, like the Chesire Cat, from Alice In Wonderland! I am a cat person, yet sadly, I do not have a pet currently. I had a few cats when I was a kid, and I miss having them around. I should adopt one, one of these days! :)
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Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 11/5/2013 5:09:00 PM
Thanks for reading and replying, SP <3
Date: 11/4/2013 12:34:00 AM
This really made me laugh out loud! I love all animals including the pups but I have always had kitties for pets and I adore them. My Layla could surely be thinking these things!
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Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 11/4/2013 8:42:00 AM
Glad you enjoyed, Deb! Thanks for reading and replying :)
Date: 11/3/2013 10:52:00 AM
oh yes, animals have a way of speaking to us... when my dog runs to the garden, she's telling me to take her out for a stroll... :) nice blog!
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That Archaic Poet Avatar
Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 11/3/2013 11:19:00 AM
Thanks, Nette! Glad you enjoyed; thanks for reading and replying :)
Date: 11/3/2013 4:09:00 AM
For the love of tuna : ) Really got me smile
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Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 11/3/2013 8:21:00 AM
Thanks, Charm ;)
Date: 11/3/2013 4:08:00 AM
: ) This is very good..Very entertaining indeed : )purrr wuff wuff
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Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 11/3/2013 8:22:00 AM
Glad you enjoyed! :)
Date: 11/2/2013 7:09:00 PM
haha, I bet some of them , if they can reason like we do at all, are actually thinking these thoughts. My dear cat has disappeared somewhere and I wonder where she is. Usually she sits with me at night. I must seek her out soon!!! as you can guess, I love cats. And if you love them too, it makes you an awesome human being!!!
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Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 11/3/2013 8:26:00 AM
I hope your kitty comes home soon, Andrea! I have a very deep love for animals; my 2 dogs and 3 kitties are my babies and I love them more than I can ever articulate. Animals will always hold a special place in my heart :)
Date: 11/2/2013 2:28:00 PM
This was so funny with a little truth to it. I have a cat and can just imagine him doing and saying some of those things. Cats are such arrogant creatures. Thanks for posting this. I enjoyed it very much. Love, Kim
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Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 11/3/2013 8:27:00 AM
Thanks for reading and replying, Kim. I'm glad you enjoyed it; it was a lot of fun to write :)
Date: 11/2/2013 2:12:00 PM
this would make a really interesting topic for a contest, to write a poem from the point of view of the cat ( or dog, or bird)
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Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 11/3/2013 8:27:00 AM
Great idea, Francine! I'm going to file that one away for a future contest I may hold; thanks for the suggestion! :)
Date: 11/2/2013 1:52:00 PM
Apsolutely loved this one... It's alot like my writtings... You did a top notch job here... I couldn't have done better!
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Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 11/3/2013 8:28:00 AM
Thanks, Carol; I really appreciate that! :)
Date: 11/2/2013 12:16:00 PM
I love this look at human behavior from the cat's point of view! Very entertaining and so enjoyable to read. Cats are very haughty creatures, indeed. You are such an amazing talent.
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Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 11/2/2013 12:24:00 PM
lol *blush* Thanks, Karen. This was so much fun to write. I was hoping to capture that haughtiness and selfishness they exude. Thanks for reading and replying <3
Date: 11/2/2013 11:02:00 AM
love this, sitting here petting my cat and its like I'm reading her thoughts
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Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 11/2/2013 12:10:00 PM
Thanks, Francine! I have 3 kitties so I was channeling their imagined inner monologues lol ;)

My Past Blog Posts

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My Pentagram Art; let me know what you think! :) ~Chan
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Date Posted: 12/3/2013 8:38:00 AM
Collage Art: Warning, May Be Offensive!
Date Posted: 12/1/2013 5:13:00 AM
More Visual Poetry: Collage Art
Date Posted: 11/25/2013 7:48:00 AM
IT'S A TRAP!!!!!
Date Posted: 11/20/2013 6:21:00 AM
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Date Posted: 11/5/2013 4:54:00 PM

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