Disturbing Trend - Donna Golden's Blog

Hello Soupers!<p> I have noticed that during the past few weeks there is a noticeable surge in poems dealing with sadness, depression, and ESPECIALLY suicide. <p>What is going on?<p> I would love to have a dialogue about this. I think (for the most part) that these are true cries for help. I think it's good that people feel safe sharing these thoughts and feelings and that ignoring it won't solve anything. However, I have a worry that suicidal thinking has become a new trend that other sites might actually encourage! <p>What do YOU think?<p> Hugs, <p> Donna <p> <p> * Added note: I do not want this blog to sound as though I am passing judgement on anyone. I'm not. I have empathy for anyone suffering from depression and hopelessnes, as I have struggled with it myself.

Erica Buckner Date: 11/21/2009 1:56:00 PM CONTINUED:It's terrible. It makes me feel so bad everytime I see someone talking about killing themself. They don't realize how bad people will hurt. But it makes me so sick when I see people joking around about suicide. It's nothing to play around with. But why? Why are most of the people in this world coming to suicide? Life is very tough. Sometimes it feels impossible to get through, but that's why God created friends and family. If you stick together, anything if beatable. -Ericalynn- Login to Reply

Erica Buckner Date: 11/21/2009 1:56:00 PM I have walked down the halls of my school, walked down the street, sat in the cafeteria or restraunts and heard many teenage people I know talk about commiting suicide. I know many of them will say it to get attention. But I don't understand why. I used to be suicidal and I never really thought of how it would affect the people around me until this whole past week. Thursday November 19, 2009 at 7:03 p.m. my Grandfather passed away due to suicide. He shot himself. It's so hard for my family but it has made me realize the ugly truth about suicide. 1) What if you don't die right away? My Grandfather shot himself in the head Tuesday and did not die suddenly. So he suffered the whole time. 2) How much everyone is affected. I hurt everytime I see the pain in my families eyes when his name is mentioned or we see something that reminds us of him. Login to Reply

Tim Ryerson Date: 11/18/2009 8:00:00 PM I agree about the holiday blues...thank God for families and friends, but some do not have this to turn to... I think there are different kinds of sadness and depression...the kind that we try to express in some of our poems attempting to turn something bad into something beautiful...and another kind which is losing all your hope and faith...which is quite different to me (if that makes any sense) It's okay to be sad, grieve, remember lost love, etc. But one simply cannot dwell their constantly...that is where the true danger is...Thanks so much Donna for bringing this up and for stimulating all these fine comments and discussions - Tim Login to Reply

Vince Suzadail Jr. Date: 11/17/2009 6:02:00 PM This is a tough situation. For some talking or writing about it is a coping skill and for others it is a trigger. A little understanding and a non judgmental talk can go a long way. Holidays are especially tough. Peple with difficult lives are more prone to suicidal thoughts,i.e., abuse, alcohol, drugs, loss, a feeling of hopelessness. Sometimes a simple smile can change a passing thought. God Bless. Vince Login to Reply

Donna Golden Date: 11/17/2009 5:57:00 PM I think you've all made some important points, here. It hadn't occurred to me that the holidays may have an influence on this trend. It's interesting that I didn't think of it, because the hardest time of the year for me is the first couple of weeks of December. I lost my oldest brother December 4, 2004. I have struggled with depression each December since then because of the anniversary of my loss. Now that I know it's coming, I need to keep myself busy, focused, and reinforced with good things and cling to my faith more than ever. So much love goes out to all who read, respond, and relate to this blog! Giant hugs! Login to Reply

Veronica Joseph Date: 11/17/2009 8:59:00 AM The rate of psychiatric hospitalizations, suicide and depression always increases at holiday time, as those who are alone or feel alone feel highlighted at this time. The holdiays are also an annual psychological milestone (what has happened/changed since last christmas) that people use to measure their lives. The holidays are a trigger for the addicted as well, and may relapse at this time due to overwhelmeing feelings or being alienated form their familes due to their own actions. That is also why many elderly people die just after the holidays. it is also more recognizable as mental illness is more "accepted" in our society and we notice it more. Reach out to those that you think may be at risk - throughout the year - invite people for a meal or a movie. And don't forget the teens and young 20's who may not have the words to ask for help but need a steady hand to get through something that seems inveitable to them. Login to Reply

Debbie Guzzi Date: 11/17/2009 6:46:00 AM Yes, Holiday Blues and also the reduced hours of light, the loss of intense color. We can help snap each other out of the blues! #1 exercise (I know NO ONE WANTS TOO..me either! LOL) #2 vitamin D #3 SAD lights, you can buy a light to sit near. 4# don't wallow it's a slippery slope d o w n. LIGHT & LOVE ..OH good books & movies! help Login to Reply

Danielle White Date: 11/17/2009 4:12:00 AM In a word: Christmas :-( ***Danielle*** Login to Reply

Corinne Curcio Date: 11/17/2009 3:32:00 AM It's probably the change of season - In autumn and winter, one's thoughts turn to getting older, death...I have great empathy for anyone suffering from sadness and depression, as I have my bouts with them. Login to Reply

Lena Townsend Date: 11/16/2009 10:44:00 PM An excellent blog with excellent responses from so many of our talented Soup family. Holidays are the hardest. I think it is a wonderful heart that would take time out to speak on this issue. I do hope that anyone that is considering this tragic act will keep in mind that there is at least one that cares for them, YOU! And I hope that they can remember that God is always there even when we think we are alone. Life carries many tragedies but many miracles in balance. I hope they can find the light in the darkness and see the miracles through the clouds of despair. I hope in faith and maybe seeing this blog on this site will serve as a reminder to them; as comfort to them. Thank you. Many blessings to everyone, and smiles from Lolita Login to Reply

Cecil Hickman Date: 11/16/2009 10:17:00 PM you indeed have a very precious and sweet heart to be concerned, and everyone knows here at the soup any one of us would help any other one in anyway possible,,christmas unfortunately is suppose to be a joyous occasion but with joy comes remembering sadness, for so many, also i know there are many that are afraid and thinking the world is coming to an end,especially with all the hype about 2012,I have no idea how people can believe that we will ever truly know when it is going to end,but I do respect your concern and honor you for them,,,Blessings..Cecil Login to Reply

Andrew Crisci Date: 11/16/2009 10:15:00 PM I couldn't agree with you more, Donna. Sadness, pain, sorrow, loss of someone, lack of faith and loneliness are the major cause of suicidal thoughts. One ofour poetry soups members made a comment on my poem, " The loneliness of a lost cloud" by saying, "...it has lifted me up and made me smile!" What a powerful statement for someone looking for the poem of the day to cheer him up! I was so glad that I had brightened up his day. If we, while reading a very sad poem which may lead one of our members to self-destruction, we must foresee the harmful signs and try to change their dark feelings by telling the that God loves them, and so do we! Write a happy poem and e-mail it to them. Happy thoughts create happiness. I hope that they will read this and change their outlook on life. Love, hugs and light, Andrew. Login to Reply

Constance La France Date: 11/16/2009 7:15:00 PM i personally feel sadness as the christmas season approaches..i think it is because christmas is so much about family and most of mine is in heaven.. a sense of loneliness althought in crowd kind of thing...i think alot of people get depressed around this time of the year... but on another note.. i tend to write sad poetry ..perhaps... could be considered depressing.. although i am quite a happy person... so that is odd.. but its where my words take me... and i bet there are many like me.. Login to Reply

Sue Mason Date: 11/16/2009 6:45:00 PM There have always been those who are depressed and prone to suicide ... ever since time began ... there seems to be more attention being paid to it and an increase of suicides in the military but as I am not professionally trained in how to deal with it, I usually just try and give people affirmations about coming to PoetrySoup and what a wonderful place it can be for writing out your feelings whatever they are. We are really blessed to have gifted artists and they can often write/speak about death/dying etc. and its part of their writing and, hopefully, not something they will actually do. Thanks for the blog, Donna and hope your days are golden with fall ... smile ... Login to Reply