Democracy now that is a laugh
When the voting is all stacked with graft
And I will give you a plug
If you punch out that lug
If you believe me you’re really daft!
You say you’re poor and you’re not real able
To put food and some bucks on the table
Just right say the rich
Starve and don’t *itch
Or drop by and muck out my stable!
Grad’s from Vassar and Yale all abhor
Those in Appalachia with dirt floors
But they own the coal mines
And their wealth is refined
They won’t mess up their minds keeping score.
You can’t get a real education
In this righteous American nation
Well go read a book
Or go shoot a crook
Rise to your appropriate station!
“O commercialized corporate franchise”
Thou that holds illusions in selling lies
Max out your credit cards
Lenders be holder’s lords
Forfeiting all bank notes as owner cries
“O commercialized corporate franchise”
My babies wonder about Christmas guys
My babies’ futures be scared
Must obey corporate lords
“O thou commercialized corporate lies”
Just commercialized greedy Xmas rush
Souls like zombies of the corporate thrust
The X of the Christ
O Love’s sacrifice
“In commercialized corporate we trust”
For Commercialized Humor contest
Sponsored by: Carolyn Devonshire
Any pretty woman turned his head
He liked them all so it is said
Then one day to his surprise
They no longer caught his eye
His sexual desire totally died
Upon the roof, outside the walls,
now tapping soft its whispered calls,
aftertaste of pain,
this afternoon rain,
like a fading afterthought, falls.
There once was a man whose intellect
He did not at anytime neglect
His imagination dull
New ideas he would cull
From his colleagues received no respect
Written: April 21, 2015
Albert Einstein quoted as saying, "The true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but
There was a fellow riding a certain train,
And he posted an unpopular refrain,
In it he said, the innocents are dead,
With politicians and voters to blame.
To choose is what many profess,
And we wouldn’t have anything less,
But our elected use quill, translate that to kill,
And babes end in a mell of a hess.
And into a health bill of lying rot,
They force objectors to kill who would not,
Adding more of their pork to so called choice,
A choice to fool many voters they sought.
Politicians and media corral voters into believing,
Bills laced with hidden agendas they’re feeding.
They make a predator fat as a sly old rat,
At the expense of a still birthed nation in grieving.
When a nation cares more for turtle or whale,
And the desire for virtue goes stale,
You’ll see a Mother’s precious womb,
By choice, become nation’s tomb,
And lawmakers growing a tail.
Don’t let the almighty dollar deceive you,
Or your sense take leave and flee you,
Take a look around before you’re ground,
Into the dust of this obvious preview.
The moral of the story is true and really quite short,
Justice has been given a hell of a thwart,
You may think it queer but the end of freedom is near,
Our great ship is sinking in it’s port.
There was a time when I stood tall
Especially in college, playing NCAA Volleyball.
Oh, the trips we went on to the various meets
Winning and losing in those much vaunted heats.
We weren't great then, now I can't jump at all.
All my friends say they can not abide
these two people I have deep inside
Let the first one insist,
feel the other resist
while I wait for their war to subside.
kitten left for cat
i got the knife in my back
no she can't come back
when we were married she did'nt cook or clean
fact is: she was only good for one thing
when she left i cried and cried
maybe once or twice thought of suicide
many years latter it was realized
my divorce was really a reward in disguise
i cannot say i hate you, but i will not be your friend
it was very distasteful, the way you treated me in the end
( for the divorce club contest)
In my travels around....
from town to town...
I found sitting next to a tree...
a red truck for sale...
that looked like _ell!
a ford, nineteen fifty-three...
So I knocked on the door...
and wasn't for sure...
if they'd sell it to me...
When they answered the door...
they wanted more...
but I gave them two-fifty, not three...
I got it running at last...
and oh! what a task!
I couldn't wait to set it free...
Yea!! it's really fast...
when I give it the gas...
ask those cops who tickets to me!
The body's intact...
just one ding and a whack!!
I'll paint it just wait and see!!!
Stoneheart Mickey McKade was his fit fighting name.
Bare Knuckle Boxing was his beloved chosen game.
Then Muley Will Dutton broke Stoneheart’s jutting jaw.
To the surprise of all present, Mickey started to bawl.
Now Slackjaw Mickey McKade is in the sport’s Hall Of Shame.
Note: A.ga.pe is three syllables.
John Moses assumed he was doing well.
You know only the absolute can tell.
His Agape, copy,
ranked totally sloppy,
At the gate Peter said, ”what’s that I smell?’
`T was certain girl from our poetry soup,
The one not in love with heavenly group,
from behind me she snickered,
and with Peter she bickered.
This is the total stinky pooh…err… scoop!
==================PS "Just Kidding"
For and in Honor of Poet Destroyer
And Contest: Slick Limerick
There once was a proud Aries like me,
whose impatience kept from being free.
But all my pride inside
never had the chance to hide
the goal of winning confidently!
When tired from sweeping with the storebought broom
I'd lean against not wanting to resume
Momma said, "Nusing your bab?"
I would sweep, under breath crab
Now would love to hear her say, "Clean your room!"
(Momma would say nusing not nursing..Bab is instead of baby..)
Francine is nothing but a little skin and a bit of bone.
She works from her house and she lives all alone.
The old gal eats just a little;
Plays the violin, not the fiddle;
And she speaks to herself on the phone.
Americans without doubt a giver
Navajo secret code did deliver
To Hitler De Fuhrer
Messages never clear
Red men spoke jumbled arrows of quiver!
Adolf’s lust thrust, the Indian giver
Receives back miseries he delivers!
In arrow toting brothers
God's quest in those saving mouths of quivers!
Native brother’s saving grace delivers
By blessed mouths filled of spoken quivers!
Now they ride the constrained range
Without horse or pocket change
Long since lost from sight those medal slivers!
For Contest:Indian Giver~Limericks
In honor of DP
We will ride straight into the sun
Come back burnt, claiming it was fun
Our aim is usually on the mark
Any miss was because of the dark
Ask for advice we'll give you a ton
Why I am so slow?
I think you should know
I meditate, cogitate, contemplate,
Yes, and then I will even palpitate
Before I let go!
Red, Black, Yellow - Brown or White
During the day or - late at night
- When Life is lost
- It’s too great a cost
No justification can make it right.
< cakes and sausages on hot griddle
uncle Leroy's dam dog just piddled
slipped ~ slide across floor
grabbed shotgun by front door
now dam ole dog just plays an fiddle
bow bow bow bow bow bow bow bow ~ wow
ow ow ow ow ow ow ow bow ~ ow
with tail between own ~ legs
now dog sings ~ and ~ brags
about cousin's daisies's bad bow ~ pows
Entry For John Freeman's
Slapstick Limerick Contest
Poor Ole Dog LOL
It’s amazing what is seen as nice
clear skin with a soul stark as ice.
Long legs with a crotch
and out she will trot
at the end of his arm, once or twice.
Sweet hearts are all hidden it seems
men want only a tart for their dreams.
A crooked smile to beguile,
a tiny mind infantile
and Boozoo’s coming apart at the seams.
When kindness is seen as a bore
All you’ll find is flaw after flaw
Then your just desserts
Will come in short skirts
While your wife gets the house and much more!
The holidays are a time when we hold loved ones close
making New Year's resolutions to be better and not so morose.
With trimming the tree, the gifts, the cards, the good wishes for all
Spending too much time and money at the mall.
Our hangover on Jan 2nd makes our resolutions go out the windows.
Rebellious and independent,
a strong mind driven by intent;
see a face never mistrusted,
hear sincere words well-expressed...
no detail is insignificant.
(C) Copyright 2010 by Andrew Crisci
New Year resolutions
They are back. Yesteryears’ resolutions
That evaporated ere execution.
My first one this time around
Is that resolves shouldn’t get drowned
Or suffer the slightest diminution.
This one sure was fairly easy enough
But the do’s and don’ts looming large look tough
It’s better for me to wait
Than decide and then debate
Those tricky easier-said-than-done-stuff.
Sorry, I have no habits to kick
Though there are a good many for the pick
I’ve no weight to lose or gain
Or fitness goals that are pain
Save a crick in neck to get rid of quick .
@ 31/ Dec/ 12
For Gwendolen's 'Limerick in the pocket'
Inventive minds can be inspired
Great ideas in time may be sired
High fashion and style
Are acquired for a while
But in the brain sex is hard wired
I had resolved one year,
To never again have a fear
But I feared sitting down,
So I walked all around
And that's how I ended up here.
Once I had a girlfriend and ex-wife.
Two ladies at the same time in life,
Mistake I made this day.
Not proud in anyway.
First mistake, second retake in strife,
Girlfriend I gave flowers for the day.
Ex-wife and I married, oui evay,
Messed up my life again,
Not knowing where I’d been.
Girlfriend forlorn, wrong card I did play.
Ex-wife left me, I got just deserts.
Got what I deserved for all my flirts.
Valentine’s Day, bad karma,
Cupid dealt me, my dharma,
Disengaging me of all subverts.
Sponsor Francine Roberts
Contest Name Valentine's Day Limerick
Who is that staring back at me
Go away on the count of three
Do I know who you are
Can I wish upon a star
Questions of who I should be
Not just demons do I fight
Thoughts drift easily through the night
Myself against me
Trying to break free
To do what I know is right
Written by: Shannon Deane
Written: June 28th, 2011
Contest: Myself Against Me
©2012 C. Brent Cloyd
I bought a new scale at the Wal-Mart store.
Made it secure and level on the floor.
I took a breath, then stepped on.
The digits I saw made me moan.
Surely, I do not weigh two-fifty-four!
Let’s balance the scale, then I’ll try once more.
Adjusted proper, they’ll give the right score.
This time the scales will behave.
I stepped on, tried to be brave.
But with a grin they said “two-fifty-four”.
I would like to throw these scales out the door.
Wish they were lying, but I can’t ignore.
I’ve gobbled many things sweet
And chewed on too much red meat.
My expanding poundage is “two-fifty-four”.
My belly is huge, my chin is galore.
Need to lose it, but process is a chore.
Need diet low in fat and starch.
So my stomach will not arch.
Hope to be smaller than “two-fifty-four”.
Would a brisk walk cause my health to restore?
Would losing blubber help me not to snore?
Let’s get started. Soon I say!
Well - after the holiday!
Cause my clothes don’t fit at “two-fifty-four”.
As I sit here and wonder where did it all go,
Why did I hurry to get here is something I do not know.
My life has pased by so quickly just a blink of the eye,
Can't remember all the things I've done or the reasons why.
What was the purpose of this it all seems so insane,
I'm left with nothing but emptiness am I to be the blame .
Where are my friends and family am I the only one left,
I guess because of what I've done this is what I get.
This isn't what I was looking for not what I imagined at all,
There is nothing I can say or do and theirs nobody I can call.
Will it ever become clear to me why don't I understand ,
Is this that wonderful plan was that God has made for man?
The path I chose to follow always seemed to take so long,
I'm begining to believe that just maybe that I was wrong.
Thinking about all the things in my life that have come to past,
Down deep I have always known that they were never meant to last.
So this is what it is like to reach this old age of mine ,
I'm starting to see that it was never really about time.
Waiting seems to be all there is for me to do these days ,
Untill the time that light shines bright showing me my way.
Feeling much better now that I have come to see,
That there was a plan and it was made especially for me.