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Funny Baseball Poems | Funny Poems About Baseball

These Funny Baseball poems are examples of Funny poems about Baseball. These are the best examples of Funny Baseball poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Free verse | |

Princesses

Pretty princesses
Dancing all around
Frolicking through fields
Very beautiful
Just like you!


Details | Blank verse | |

Bats

mostly
happy
ever after
hanging 
upside down from a rafter

giving my cherished name
to short splintered sticks
that hits long balls
out of sight
both day and night and

did I mention the difficulty that I have 
in going while hanging upside down
God made it so that 
I must move to move
and stand upright


Details | Rhyme | |

Worthless or Priceless?

It was the best cherry-cola that I ever had. 
It’s the aftertaste now that’s incredibly bad. 
It was 1953, at the corner Five and Dime. 
I still think it might have been some sort of crime.

I had saved enough money from mowing some yards, 
to buy one more pack of Topps Baseball Cards. 
As I peeled back the wrapper, anticipation grew, 
hoping to find an all-star, maybe two.

But, treasure doesn’t always appear like one thinks. 
“Nothing” I yelled out, “This totally stinks.” 
Some rookie named Mantle was all that I found. 
“Fat chance of him ever sticking around.”

My buddy there with me was a big Yankees fan, 
a sucker, I thought, for my ingenious plan. 
With considerable effort, I convinced him to swap, 
my “worthless” card for his “priceless” pop.

The bottle’s still worth a nickel at the store,
The “Mick”? I’d guess, just a little bit more.
It sits on my shelf, like a trophy I earned,
A reminder to me of a lesson once learned.



Note: The 1952 Rookie Mickey Mantle card has been 
valued at over $50,000 by some price guides. – Wow! 
I have lots of old baseball cards I collected as a kid, but 
not this one. I wrote this as I watched an old-timer tell 
a shop-owner about one that “got-away.”


Details | Free verse | |

Pardon This Page

I reveal these words to the American,
who has the right to pardon this page,
while the whole world's getting out of hand,
as the evils of revelations rage,

Why's the US helping foreign lands?
when it can't get a grip on it's own,
If they intend to make any future plans...
why not start right here at home?

It's nobody's right to invade anywhere;
there's no serious threat here at home,
so send the officials whom send our troops there..
and on the front line with a cell phone,

Yea! parachute them in with a baseball bat,
a cell phone and a roll of duct tape,
One they get to where imposing minds are at...
they can put on their superman cape,

Or, drug them and issue them a used baseball bat,
a walkie talkie and a catchers mitt...
Once they realize where and the heck they're at,
there's a chance they'll resign or quit,

And pardon me if you don' t feel the same,
or believe "just"...........as I do,
but those thousands of humans killed and maimed...
continue growing in numbers too.