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3:17AM - From a few years ago

Gabrielle Charisse Avatar  Send Soup Mail  Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled 3:17AM - From a few years ago which was written by poet Gabrielle Charisse. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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3:17AM - From a few years ago

F*** this idle mind, it never rests
silence delivers all of me
Delusion has set in, he’s at his best
Question the truth of reality

Hate rises above it all
Out of shadows comes sanity
Gathers up his toll in wasted souls
(Their vanity)
He is the Father of  Darkness
Eager for them to meet their fate and fall
(Give them to me)

Alone again, as I lay my head
Snapshots of my life with you
Memories that he says will fade 
Cry to him to bring the end
Tears on lashes turn to lead 

He grants one wish
Eyes won‘t open, no mistake
Prison door without the key
Lifeless, he carries me
Has he granted my eternity

Leave behind disgrace
Chose my path, the only option  
Owe to him this final breath 
In his hands my soul placed
Debt is paid, now I rest

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  1. Date: 6/19/2013 8:01:00 PM
    I think you got up early in the morning to write this, and I can feel your pain in your words. Good job! You definitely want your readers to have some sort of emotion from your verses. However, I'm not that smart a guy, and I do tend to get lost in your metaphors (i.e. Robert Plant singing "Stairway to Heaven" even he doesn't understand what he wrote). But all I know to really to tell you in this case is to read the classics and keep at it.