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Vitrine-mannequin on a Winter night

Giorgio A. V. Avatar Giorgio A. V. - LIFETIME Premium Member Giorgio A. V. - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Vitrine-mannequin on a Winter night which was written by poet Giorgio A. V.. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Vitrine-mannequin on a Winter night

Dependent was and amorous obsession 5.5
in burning desert, fresh canteen 4
his sidewalk's fantasy and thoughts' digression, 5.5
the strongest coffee's roasted bean 4
(their phantasms met beyond projectors' light). 5

Exquisite stood upfront, unmoving posture,
distressing emptiness of soul,
unreachable resort her sightly stature,
(- expending skies and ozone hole),
prêt à porter vitrine and cloudy night.

Behind the glass, a still and standing shadow
abates his hopes (the sky suspends),
( he takes his foolish stance of wooden scarecrow,
- that through odd sprawls the fields attends ),
was she the blessing of the Gods or else?...

His allegorical, but lonely feeling,
instilled inside, without defect,
while speechless phantoms crossed sky's ceiling,
the downpour soaked, warmth to reject,
(ersatz their wedlock's knolling, fast dispels).

Her uppish, elegant of stance, adjacent,
within arm's reach, kind of abstruse,
albeit abstained, of secular indulgence,
(his head acquired a tilt obtuse),
invited him through faultless, charming lies.

A brass trumpet dispersed its jazzy spieling,
he, thoughtless, leaned on some red booth,
adored her raised one hand's refined appealing,
(- that altruistic, smiling tooth!),
and gazing to the stars but vacant eyes!...

© 11-16-2013, All Rights Reserved
Hellenic Quintain!
(Iambic Quintain following 5.5, 4, 5.5, 4, 5 feet on each stanza. 
The rhyme scheme follows this pattern: ABABC DEDEC, FGFGH, IJIJH ... and so on.)

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  1. Date: 10/1/2014 3:33:00 PM
    Congrats Giorgio on your awesome win in the contest!This is an exceptional writing and i am glad to be reading this again.. All your poems are like finest creations of poetry. You know as you write, you seem to move with such easy assurance,, so gracious and words flowing beautifully!!!

  1. Date: 9/29/2014 10:25:00 PM
    Congratulations, as I have said before to other poets, I am sure I would break my brain trying to write a poem with a form as complex as this. Your dedication and love for your art is admirable. Your win should surprise no one.

    A. V. Avatar Giorgio A. V.
    Date: 10/1/2014 5:30:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thank you, Maurice.
  1. Date: 9/29/2014 2:52:00 PM
    Congratulations on your amazing winning poem Giorgio.

  1. Date: 9/29/2014 2:31:00 PM
    You take on the most difficult meters with such ease, or so it seems. Stunning as always!

    A. V. Avatar Giorgio A. V.
    Date: 10/1/2014 5:31:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thank you, Carrie.
  1. Date: 12/18/2013 3:01:00 AM
    Awesome work, Giorgio!!!

  1. Date: 12/15/2013 3:05:00 PM
    It's a very methodical poem and to me writing this would be an achievement of sorts in poetry. Not an easy composition. Your words amaze me! and you inspire... I'm learning, Giorgio!

  1. Date: 12/15/2013 2:35:00 PM
    - Proficient - as you are able to do work with very good results. - Not many .... but you are one of the few, Giorgio !!!! - oxox // Anne-Lise :)

  1. Date: 12/15/2013 2:27:00 PM
    I am favouring this gem .You have an excellent unique talent and never ending vocabulary.My poems are so simple compared to yours.Amazing!!

  1. Date: 12/15/2013 1:18:00 PM
    I'm impressed! G

  1. Date: 12/15/2013 7:14:00 AM
    an absolutely stunning poem here - if only you had written it for a contest of mine!! your vocabulary is so extensive and so creative, I need to read your poems with a dictionary on my lap! a 7 from me, and surely a 1st place for this...