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sun shower

Debbie Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi - LIFETIME Premium Member Debbie Guzzi - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled sun shower which was written by poet Debbie Guzzi. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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sun shower

sun shower:
her mud pies on the
picnic table

*contemporary haiku do not  require 5/7/5 just less than 17
even Soup says less than 17

** why this fits the topic probability - probable outcomes
*** the child could have been upset and ran inside so as not to get wet
which is actually more probable

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  1. Date: 12/13/2014 1:59:00 AM
    sunbaked Mississippi Mud Pie? ...Rajat

  1. Date: 10/17/2014 7:20:00 PM
    You're most analytical when it comes to haiku. I love the image that this one creates. I imagine a nice countryside where a little girl is making mud pies by a farm house... ahhh it's good to be back on the Soup! I've been gone too long...

  1. Date: 8/26/2014 6:43:00 PM
    excellent lesson thank you. also an excellent haiku. i see how you layered in between the line possibilities. like the mud pies that suggest a child is most likely involved. or a very old person who for some practical reasons should probably be in hospital.

  1. Date: 7/28/2014 7:50:00 AM
    A good haiku and a lesson. Now I'm looking a the haiku that I just finished writing, ummm???

  1. Date: 7/24/2014 2:21:00 PM
    hi Debs......I am happy to be back in The Soup and very pleased t o see you still giving it your all -as they say. Tanya sends love too....and we are currently on vacation from the dreadful school work....but i t doesnt last long enough really.... OK...hope to chat later .....kindest wishes...Syd

  1. Date: 7/23/2014 9:45:00 AM
    Aha!!I am favouring this exceptional haiku.Kash is back ..He visited my poetry few days ago.So glad.

  1. Date: 7/21/2014 5:17:00 PM
    Nice, Good luck, Debs.

  1. Date: 7/21/2014 3:12:00 PM
    I actually thought of a child coming from the wet outdoors to find her/his mother's baked treasuries in the kitchen, before I saw your comment below. Such a little gem of a haiku!

  1. Date: 7/21/2014 2:55:00 PM
    Interesting write by you Debi.Good luck in the contest.

  1. Date: 7/19/2014 10:51:00 PM
    Great poem Debbie.. I really appreciate your notes that make the work more enjoyable