Get Your Premium Membership

Sapphic Stanza with a JUX - craig cornish's Blog

About craig cornish
(Show Details...)
Bloggers PhotoMy Biography is Coming Soon...

Sapphic Stanza with a JUX

Blog Posted:1/13/2019 12:36:00 PM

 

 

 

Hang with me here, it may be painful but then - the gain thingy. I'm gonna go to & fro here so stick around for a moment lest your eyes glaze too quickly but hit the road if you know you are hopeless at meter cuz you won't have a prayer with this. First, I'd like to introduce the winner of a Sapphic Stanza contest from 2013, you know her as the Queen of Seduction, so with no further ado, this is Eileen Manassion's correctly metered poem. (2 verses) This is a new contest!


Heavenly Splendor

 

Wounded, bleeding, dying in utter anguish
Downcast, burdened, constantly second guessing
Seraph’s heartbeat rhythmically wakens visions
Longing for heaven

Sunshine, laughter, beautiful running fountains
Nature, beaming, showing her outer garment
Children, lovers, cherubs and seraphs singing
Heavenly splendor

Eileen Manassian Ghali
(Eileen, bravo with not only the perfect meter - the easy part HAHA- but also a write worth its message - the most difficult aspect of this form, blending almost impossible meter with a worthy message.)

Now, one more Sapphic Stanza from a few years ago by someone. like Cher, who only need be announced by her first name, our Andrea; 1 verse

KOKOPELLI

Listen! There's a melody wafting sweetly

Tempting blossoms liltingly watch enchantment!

Kokopelli's bringing the beauty nearer ~

Magical flautist!      (Special stuff, see what can be done by two fine poets!)

Copyright ©  | Year Posted 2015

Definition

The Sapphic stanza, named after Sappho, is a poetic form spanning four lines. The form is three hendecasyllabic lines of trochee, trochee, dactyl, trochee, trochee and a concluding line of dactyl, trochee, known as the Adonic or adonean line. 

Example

The Sapphic stanza was imitated in English by Algernon Charles Swinburne in a poem he simply called Sapphics:

Saw the white implacable Aphrodite,
Saw the hair unbound and the feet unsandalled
Shine as fire of sunset on western waters;
Saw the reluctant. . .

Allen Ginsberg also experimented with the form:

Red cheeked boyfriends tenderly kiss me sweet mouthed

Under boulder coverlets winter springtime                                             hug me naked laughing & telling girl friends    (hug me starts line 3)

gossip til autumn

 

OKAY, trochee is nothing more than the opposite of iamb, the accented syllable is first so instead of xX it is Xx and dactyl is 3 syllables in a measure (beat) constructed of accented non non or Xxx. So, if I were to write Eileen's with the accented syllables in caps and un accented small
it would look like this.
 
WOUNDed, BLEEDing, DYing in UTter ANguish
DOWNcast, BURdened, CONstant ly SECond GUESsing
(same for line 3)
Line 4 though is Xxx Xx  LONGing for HEAven
 
I'm going to make this a little tougher though because if you look at this ancient Greek form it does have that Asian influence. So let's take that final line and make it sort of an AHA! Which Andrea actually does in hers - SEE!
Here's one I wrote as another example;
 
Harvest Moon
Harvest moon you welcome another season,
leaving dreams of summer to winter's wishes;
greens turn shades of orange and red and yellow ~
marshmallow campfires.
(See the twist, the jux, which adds a tad of fun)
Please Login to post a comment
Date: 1/16/2019 5:25:00 PM
Hmmm... interesting! Do you just want one stanza Craig, or are multiples acceptable?
Login to Reply
cornish Avatar
craig cornish
Date: 1/16/2019 6:45:00 PM
Nina, what is important if you know me is quality, which means the more you write the tougher it gets---one great write is better than two ordinary---but do not forget the JUX
Date: 1/13/2019 7:20:00 PM
Remember the Jux in the new versions
Login to Reply
Date: 1/13/2019 7:17:00 PM
deep and dreamy, whispering, calling softly falling teardrops, memories, sadly floating hearing mother murmuring from the garden talking to flowers
Login to Reply
cornish Avatar
craig cornish
Date: 1/14/2019 5:13:00 PM
Andrea, your example though I want new ones could work for a Jux for sure.
Dietrich Avatar
Andrea Dietrich
Date: 1/14/2019 3:01:00 PM
I see it here, Dear Heart. It is -really beautiful. thanks for finding it, Craig
Dietrich Avatar
Andrea Dietrich
Date: 1/14/2019 3:01:00 PM
and for including my poem on your blog.
Wiishkobe Ode Avatar
Dear Heart- Wiishkobe Ode
Date: 1/14/2019 9:25:00 AM
Yes, that's it, oh yes, I have always loved that poem you inspired me to pen, I recall now that you had left, I did once also, for almost a year, I had lost my muse , it ended up I was sick, then, I returned in the summer of 2012, with the poem, The Dream Lingers and here I am.
cornish Avatar
craig cornish
Date: 1/13/2019 7:18:00 PM
Please refer to the proper format on Dear Hearts history - it is an excellent example which won first in 2015 I think.
Date: 1/13/2019 7:09:00 PM
Dear Heart, Yes you did finish first in one of the contest and with a beautiful write, one of my favs. I will post it above--I don't have my old contests back that far but I found this through your lead
Login to Reply
Date: 1/13/2019 3:45:00 PM
Interesting, I think that I placed in that contest too, in first place to be specific, seeing as I have only written one of those in my entire life, I am confident in saying this. I will look for the title. Title is - springtime flowers
Login to Reply
cornish Avatar
craig cornish
Date: 1/13/2019 9:19:00 PM
Thank you, Constance, I had to go back3-5 years from memory because I had closed my account a couple years ago so all reference was gone. Yours was one of my favorites, perfectly done, from all 3 contests.

My Past Blog Posts

 
Legend
Date Posted: 10/16/2019 9:37:00 AM
Something I Am Not Winners
Date Posted: 9/2/2019 3:53:00 PM
Contest Rules
Date Posted: 7/13/2019 7:12:00 AM
The Cancer Contest
Date Posted: 6/23/2019 4:32:00 PM
Contest Advice
Date Posted: 5/31/2019 1:30:00 PM
The New Contest EDITED
Date Posted: 4/23/2019 6:18:00 PM
Bougainvillia Praises
Date Posted: 4/20/2019 12:15:00 PM
Andrea & Jan
Date Posted: 4/14/2019 2:53:00 PM
Bougainvillea Contest
Date Posted: 3/17/2019 11:56:00 AM
Song Lyrics Contest
Date Posted: 2/17/2019 3:56:00 PM
Sapphic Contest Judged
Date Posted: 2/13/2019 9:43:00 AM
A Thousand Words
Date Posted: 2/1/2019 4:03:00 PM
Sapphic Perfection
Date Posted: 1/28/2019 11:54:00 AM
Sapphic Stanza Contest
Date Posted: 1/26/2019 5:22:00 PM
Tontoism and other thoughts
Date Posted: 1/23/2019 10:05:00 AM
Sapphic Stanza with a JUX
Date Posted: 1/13/2019 12:36:00 PM
Are You Blue
Date Posted: 1/11/2019 2:14:00 PM
Writing Quality Poetry
Date Posted: 1/7/2019 5:12:00 PM
Raindrop Contest Judged
Date Posted: 11/25/2018 4:31:00 PM
Just a Reminder Every Year
Date Posted: 11/13/2018 11:02:00 AM
Thomas Wolfe
Date Posted: 10/7/2018 11:38:00 PM
Truths
Date Posted: 8/16/2018 8:21:00 AM
Follow Up on the Poet Doctor's Blog
Date Posted: 7/14/2018 7:58:00 AM
Plagiarism
Date Posted: 6/30/2018 3:50:00 PM
Peeves
Date Posted: 6/29/2018 1:50:00 PM

My Recent Poems

Date PostedPoemTitleFormCategories
10/12/2019 Witch's Brew Rhymeevil,sin,
10/8/2019 Where Evil Creeps Quatorzainscary,
10/6/2019 Burn Brightest Sonnetautumn,
9/25/2019 My Favorite Junkyard Free verselife,
9/19/2019 Words Rhymesong,
9/9/2019 Where Bumbles Bounce Sonnetnature,
9/4/2019 Twenty Years of Spaces Filled Free versepets,
8/28/2019 An Ode to the Force Free verseinspirational,
8/25/2019 Muhammad Ali Clerihewfunny,
8/22/2019 On the Beach Free versebeach,
8/13/2019 Alone Free verselife,
8/6/2019 Continuum Free verselife,
8/5/2019 Tomb of Ancient Bloom Monorhymereligious,
8/3/2019 Something I Am Not Blank verselove,
7/30/2019 Silent Stares Free verselife,
7/25/2019 lost and found Free verselife,
7/18/2019 A Dream Free versedream,
7/14/2019 The Leaf Free versenature,
7/10/2019 Jalopies Free verselife,
7/6/2019 A Moment Free verselove,
7/4/2019 Until One Day Abecedarianlove,
6/30/2019 The Hatch Shell Free versecelebration,
6/28/2019 Five Minutes More Free versetime,
6/11/2019 Synesthesia Free versesenses,
6/9/2019 Event Horizon Free verselife,
6/9/2019 Life's Shores Free verselife,
6/6/2019 Ezra Crown of Sonnetslife,
5/25/2019 The Topic of Cancer Free versecancer,
5/19/2019 Night Shoes Iambic Pentameternight,
5/15/2019 Crannies Free versememory,
5/5/2019 invasive Free verselife,
4/30/2019 Period Free verselanguage,
4/27/2019 Until the Dust Settles Free verseanxiety,
4/24/2019 Lost Smiles Quatorzainlife,
4/15/2019 Haiku 13 Haikufunny,
4/9/2019 Fickle Flight Sonnetlife,
3/31/2019 Olfactory Humor Rhymehumorous,
3/18/2019 Bougainvillea Free verselove hurts,
3/7/2019 The Tooth Fairy's Confession Rhymefunny,
2/22/2019 I'm Always Right Here Lyriceulogy,
2/19/2019 The Face of Love Free verselove,
2/10/2019 Golden Rules Free verselife,
1/31/2019 The Siren's Song Villanellelife,
1/29/2019 The Dreamer Rhymelife,
1/27/2019 The Bounty's Fate Sonnetlife,
1/23/2019 Stay Sonnetlife,
1/22/2019 Outback Souls Quatraineulogy,
1/19/2019 The Dawning Sun Villanellespring,
1/16/2019 The Elders Free verselife,
1/1/2019 forgottens remembered Free versememory,
12/24/2018 Culinary Sonnet Sonnetfood,
12/22/2018 Grown up Lullaby RhymeLullaby,
12/20/2018 simple gifts Free versememory,
12/18/2018 The Forgotten Marionette Free verselife,
12/17/2018 Our Journey Free verselove,
12/11/2018 life is about Free verselife,
12/7/2018 Lickin Sugar Free versechildhood,
12/7/2018 The Barbs of Life Sonnetlife,
12/6/2018 Ten Again Free versechildhood,
11/20/2018 No Place Like Home Rhymelife,
11/19/2018 Johnson's Field Free verse8th grade,
11/18/2018 Paradise Free versefire,
11/13/2018 Raindrop Dreams Free versedream,
10/30/2018 Halloween Night Free versehalloween,
10/27/2018 Bridal Veil Falls Free versenature,
10/2/2018 The Marina Free verseboat,
9/13/2018 The Last Hurrah Free versedeath,
9/4/2018 Repurposed Evolution Free verselife,
8/25/2018 E Klaman Bottles Free verseart,beauty,
8/17/2018 Born a Smile Sonnetlife,
8/14/2018 Sour Grapes Sonnetinspiration,
8/10/2018 Synathroesmic Cat Coupletpets,
8/8/2018 Gone 'Til Dawn Free verselife,
8/5/2018 A Fragile Wish Sonnetlove,
6/30/2018 Back Home on the Farm Free versefarm,
6/14/2018 Poetry is Born Free verselife,
6/8/2018 The Night Free versenight,
6/5/2018 Smiles Free verseloss,
6/4/2018 Pie Eyed Rhymefantasy,
5/22/2018 The Grist Mill Free verselife,
5/17/2018 Sophistication Free verselife,
5/16/2018 The Perpetual Pessimist Free verselife,
5/16/2018 The Bard of Avon Sonnetwriting,
4/23/2018 So Many Worlds at Work Free versespring,
4/16/2018 Twenty Years of Spaces Filled Quatorzainloss,pets,
4/8/2018 Daydream Sonnetlove,
3/30/2018 Await The Breeze Sonnetlife,
3/29/2018 Au Revoir Sonnetlove,war,
3/13/2018 In Silence I Stand Villanelleheartbroken,
3/10/2018 Fiddleheads on the River Walls Italian Sonnetlife,
1/27/2018 Strings Free verselife,
1/23/2018 Coming of Age Rhymefunny,
1/20/2018 Birthday Girl Sonnetbirthday,
1/17/2018 Lost Love Sonnetlife,
1/10/2018 Just A Few Clerihews Clerihewfun,
1/7/2018 The Leprechaun's Gift Rhymelife,
1/6/2018 The Otters Play Sonnetlife,
1/4/2018 New England Conversation Rhymelife,
1/1/2018 Naked Apprehension Free versechristmas,
1/1/2018 Buttons and Keys Coupletlife,

My Photos


Fav Poems

Fav Poets

PoetCountry 
Heather Ober Canada Flag Canada Read
Frederic Parker United States Flag United States Read
Rhoda Tripp United States Flag United States Read
Phillip Garcia United States Flag United States Read