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A Mini Pub inspired by Brian and Cyndi - craig cornish's Blog

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A Mini Pub inspired by Brian and Cyndi


Blog Posted:7/8/2017 3:12:00 PM

Brian's recent blog about song lyrics and Cyndi's recent poem "I'd Rather Write About", was my inspiration for this blog. Strange, I know, but sometimes thoughts in different places have common ground. Interesting in dissimilar ways. When I read Cyndi's poem it fired a memory about a similar multidimentional write by Antonio Carlos Jobim (best known for "The Girl from Ipanima" and the Bossa Nova craze) It is called "The Waters of March"---Who would think this could be a song, and a good one. I like Jane Monheit's version the best--check it out, but mostly, what are your thoughts on the lyrics/poem.  Thanks

The Waters of March lyrics 

 

 
A stick a stone
it's the end of the road,
 
it's the rest of the stump
it's a little alone
 
it's a sliver of glass,
it is life, it's the sun,
 
it is night ,it is death,
it's a trap, it's a gun.
 
the oak when it blooms,
a fox in the brush,
 
the knot in the wood,
the song of the thrush.
 
the wood of the wind,
a cliff, a fall,
 
a scratch, a lump,
it is nothing at all.
 
it's the wind blowing free.
it's the end of a slope.
 
it's a beam, it's a void,
it's a hunch, it's a hope.
 
and the riverbank talks.
of the water of march
 
it's the end of the strain,
it's the joy in your heart.
 
the foot, the ground,
the flesh, the bone,
 
the beat of the road,
a slingshot stone.
 
a fish, a flash,
a silvery glow,
 
a fight, a bet,
the range of the bow.
 
the bed of the well,
the end of the line,
 
the dismay in the face,
it's a loss, it's a find.
 
a spear, a spike,
a point, a nail,
 
a drip, a drop,
the end of the tale.
 
a truckload of bricks,
in the soft morning light,
 
the shot of a gun,
in the dead of the night.
 
a mile, a must,
a thrust, a bump.
 
it's a girl, it's a rhyme.
it's the cold, it's the mumps.
 
the plan of the house,
the body in bed,
 
the car that got stuck,
it's the mud, it's the mud.
 
a float, a drift,
a flight, a wing,
 
ahawk, a quail,
the promise of spring.
 
and the riverbanks talks.
of the waters of march.
 
it's the promise of life,
it's the joy in your heart,
 
a snake, a stick,
it is john, it is joe,
 
it's a thorn in your hand,
and a cut on your toe.
 
a point, a grain,
a bee, a bite,
 
a blink, a buzzard,
the sudden stroke of night.
 
a pin, a needle,
a sting, a pain,
 
a snail, a riddle,
a weep, a stain.
 
a pass in the mountains.
a horse, a mule,
 
in the distance the shelves.
rode three shadows of blue.
 
and the riverbank talks
of the promise of life
in your heart, in your heart
 
a stick, a stone,
the end of the load,
 
the rest of the stump,
a lonesome road.
 
a sliver of glass,
a life, the sun,
 
a night, a death,
the end of the run
 
and the riverbank talks
of the waters of march
 
it's the end of all strain
it's the joy in your heart
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Date: 7/10/2017 3:19:00 PM
Ha, Written by John Magee when he was 17 (1939)-These I have loathed/asthmatic engines;stations/tea in the parlor,coughing congregations;coal scuttles and coal and clammy hands and businessmen and military bands/tomatoes;hypocrites and smelly places;ill-conceived emotion;vulgar faces;orderly picnics;pavement written scandal;cups without a handle;aspiring pianists;pajamas;cobwebs and my brothers blatant face;unripe bananas and ripe ones;wet hands I can't wipe;stocks and shares and millionaires ....(and much more, but you get the idea--some fun)
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cornish Avatar
craig cornish
Date: 7/10/2017 6:23:00 PM
Yes Brian, he is one ironically like Rupert Brooke (perhaps the most handsome poet ever) that died very young, Brooke at 28 and Magee at 19, like other artist we wonder what they would have shared had they survived.
Strand Avatar
Brian Strand
Date: 7/10/2017 4:42:00 PM
This Magee offering 'things I have loathed' might also make for an amusing contest as well Craig
Strand Avatar
Brian Strand
Date: 7/10/2017 4:18:00 PM
Craig ,what a legacy this young man left,due in the main to just one poem.Have sent off for a copy of his poems so that I can read' Ha' in its fulness.Thank for this pointer.
Date: 7/10/2017 9:23:00 AM
Brian, thank you but way too kind with your praise. Cyndi and Chris and yourself have shared much more substantive analysis than I. I'm far from a analytical writer like Chris and Cyndi and others. I'm a junk yard dog with street smarts with still much to learn, always much to learn, within and without the ropes. It is a great deal of fun to learn from both; those who know "the right way" and those who just "shoot from the hip". Interesting that after a time most gravitate toward the "right way", when I believe it's best to hang out in your own space while giving "the right way" due consideration.
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Date: 7/10/2017 12:39:00 AM
A name for this form perhaps , 'an eclectic collage of words'
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cornish Avatar
craig cornish
Date: 7/10/2017 2:54:00 PM
Well said
Date: 7/9/2017 4:47:00 PM
I have previously written poetry entitled 'streams of consciousness' Perhaps these'streams' ,poetic format is worthy of a copycat .I'll let Antonio's masterpiece gestate within and see what happens .The most inspiring blog we've had for quite a while Craig.Thanks (and for intro to the music which I was unfaniliar,)Its why PS is the best poetic workshop on the web.
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cornish Avatar
craig cornish
Date: 7/10/2017 3:02:00 PM
Well done Brian, I must give it a go myself----no pressure, the next day or two or perhaps a contest --Hmmm--your poem is very well done.
Strand Avatar
Brian Strand
Date: 7/10/2017 1:34:00 PM
Have just posted my first attempt using this eclectic collage words style 'Dream Streams'
Date: 7/9/2017 4:40:00 PM
Craig, me being me ,I was intrigued also by the technical form Antonio uses for this stream of consciousness poetry.I copied it ,pasted it and analysed it into a four parts, with 5 quatrains,then a refrain,then 8 quatrains and a refrain,4 quatrains and a refrain,ending with 2 and a refrain.When seen/read this way it is defintely poetry imho.(well it would win one of my premieres!)
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Date: 7/9/2017 4:34:00 PM
Craig, Antonio's lyrics continue to intrigue me,until I discovered (viaWiki) some more facts about it.When he translated in English he left out some original bits,and inserted others to fit the change of Hemisphere.He also told the music composer he collaborated with that the content was a 'stream of consciousness' of images.This all fits so well with both the title images of a river I. torrent,and the detrius therein.
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Date: 7/9/2017 8:54:00 AM
It's amazing and says something, not only about this write but any that were either put to music later or melodies that words were later added to. We can never listen to either again separately without mentally putting them together. For instance, after hearing the song, now when you read these words it's nearly impossible not to hear the melody and actually read the words to that pace. It has spoiled some melodies for me in the past like "The Stars and Stripes Forever"--but I suppose we should be kind to our web footed friends anyway--yuk yuk
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Brian Strand
Date: 7/9/2017 4:18:00 PM
Thanks Craig I found Jane's version.The music fits the title.
Date: 7/9/2017 3:22:00 AM
Yes Craig the poetry complements the music,(could not find the Monheit but liked the Susannah McCorkle ) I read the Jobim original is a tribute to Brazil's rainiest month and the ' list ' style emulates the imagery of water fall flowing thereof .The music. and words together certainly complements that image
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cornish Avatar
craig cornish
Date: 7/9/2017 9:05:00 AM
Brian, if you search Jane Monheit/the waters of march---it will/should come up for you---also the waters of march/the company, is an excellent version--others tend not to stick to the English lyrics
cornish Avatar
craig cornish
Date: 7/9/2017 8:38:00 AM
Also, as I alluded to Cyndi, March in Brazil is the beginning of their "winter", where we in the Northern hemisphere think of it as Spring. I believe you also once discussed the challenge of poetry (or lyrics) being translated and still working in the new language as most of Jobim's songs were written in Portuguese first.
cornish Avatar
craig cornish
Date: 7/9/2017 8:32:00 AM
LOL---think of trying to remember all these words while singing the song to a challenging melody as well--not simple. Thanks for your input Brian
Date: 7/8/2017 10:45:00 PM
While it is a lovely song, and written in list form, still... the rhyme is couplet. Hmm.... i don't know what to think about that, LOL I'll look at it again in the morning if i have time. Love and hugs, Catie :)
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Lindsey  Avatar
Catie Lindsey
Date: 7/9/2017 9:15:00 AM
yes, as most of it is end rhyme. But it does give ME a better idea on how to write lyrics. Thanks. Love and hugs, Catie :)
cornish Avatar
craig cornish
Date: 7/9/2017 8:19:00 AM
Good pick up Catie and I think it is needed because they are put to music. Also, I think that a list like this to a melody needs it to congeal the separate parts. Perhaps even in poem form some subtle internal rhyme might help do the same.
Date: 7/8/2017 9:47:00 PM
:) Hey you. Lovely blog. I really enjoyed this song. And the funny thing is, you and I may be sharing similar thoughts about "lists" and poetry. I'm currently working on one for submission title "Proof of Life." (In the early stages, right now). I love the metaphoric approach to the song above.. especially "the riverbank talks of he waters of March." Change, perseverance, getting through tough times, the 'for all things there is a season' feel of it. Glad to have read it and will need to hear it later. Huuuugs!
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cornish Avatar
craig cornish
Date: 7/9/2017 8:25:00 AM
He had to work to translate this from Portuguese to English and March has different seasonal implications in Brazil yet the metaphor of seasons to life is well done here.
Date: 7/8/2017 4:18:00 PM
Craig one of the by products to this lyric/music discussion where one complements the other is in the creation thereof.Which comes first lyric or music? and to what extent the one inspires the other?
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cornish Avatar
craig cornish
Date: 7/9/2017 8:28:00 AM
Not sure here which came first but Jobim whether he wrote the words or the melody always wrote with a song in mind but in this case I would think the words would have to come first, but who knows.
Date: 7/8/2017 4:15:00 PM
Craig I will try to find Jane's version on youtube to have a listen.For me these lyrics shown in your blog are an open poetry form in their own right,and also no doubt complementary to the music.
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