Funny Poems That'll Make Your Day & Make You Laugh

(in)equalities fat ugly thin beautiful beautiful good ugly evil strength power knowledge = power persuasion > force wealth success avarice = evil impoverished lazy expensive quality travel miles experience years educated wise ignorant stupid law justice law = order revenge justice wedding marriage food = love love >> hate kindness > religion religion - love = cult statement - evidence = opinion love...

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grandma’s socks were hollyhocks her jumper juniper her skirt was a wort with a yellowness but some days she wore a purpleness sort squirm and squirm and writhe and dance as grandma’s undies were nettle pants ...

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SPRING FORWARD --> slipping & sliding ---> sneezING away ------))!!! looming wet yellow haze : *SEVERE* outages : FUTURECAST HiBeRnAtIoN Day! ; all ?|^devouring^|? (PM—AM) / gargantuan STORMS ; breaking singing stinging\\\\springing toward////springing stinging shaking a THREAT !!!!-------------wildfiring forward----------market MELTdown springing advisory (duly logged)--(Exit apocalypse) )~~~WIND forward accelerating your toward(ing) - smoldering : its SERIOUS (3 out of 4) *\/*~*\/*~*\/*~*\/*~*\/*~*\/*~*\/*~*\/*~*\/*~*\/*~*\/*~*\/* RESPOND :...

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rhino and chimp in the knife and fork drawer a baker baking bread on the ocean floor jumble jumble indoor shed oh someone put the oak tree back to bed daffodil and tulip in a coffee machine big clown shoes on a beauty queen jumble jumble paper seat oh someone poured the gravy on their auntie’s feet gingerbread biscuit men launched into space next door’s house...

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Herodotus thought that the sun, When blown from its course, summer's done. That wasn't quite true, Was maybe coo-coo, But thinking about it is fun....

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The mission was simple; To save the whole planet From white clouds Lies the troopers The wind howled As they fell down A headfirst dive At the speed of sound Death is a friend of the Earth They thought, as they fell across the sky I am the savior of the Earth But I know not how or why Today they made a sacrifice That little drop of...

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Walked in through those gates, the legends foretold/ valley of death? Try a circus of old/ The baddest dude charged, Timber! Came the call/ He fell like a Jenga tower, five stories tall/ A gang rolled up, thinking strength in their mix/ Twenty-five sprawled out, my karate did the tricks/ One guy swung a mop, I said, nice try my dude/ Bruce...

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I bought me a horse from a feller named Clyde, said, "She’s gentle and sweet, just a joy for to ride." Well, "Maybe" she was, and maybe she weren't-- the first thing she did was dump me in dirt. I saddled up hopeful, boots shiny and proud, "Maybe" just yawned and sat down on the ground. I pulled, and I pushed,...

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"Time... Always here but never here." By Poet Time my funny friend, I cannot see you or feel you. Yet time you are always with me, from morning until night. The clocks tick off, the many minutes and hours. The calendar takes off the 365 days, 52 weeks and the 12 months. Time where do you live, out in space or in the clocks? My...

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I saw her in a meadow high Where red flowers touch the sky Her eyes were mournful, so much inside I looked within, skepticism died (chorus) I'm in love with a big blue cow And a big blue cow loves me She don't have a job, but she survives Without that college degree She don't take drugs, and she don't drink We agree about politics,...

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I announce a decree, overactive bladder, pee frequently. I must haste to and fro, because I just really have to go. Gangway, vacate the loo, or I'm going to splash all over you! I wear industrial size diapers that are pricey, I'm a human waterfall, how dicey. Aging isn't easy, I know this poem is cheesy, but I still can do a little dance, as I've nicknamed...

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Scavenging squirrels search for acorns, scratching old stumps from trees. Scampering up my sugar maple, they steal my bird feeder seeds. Sleepy salamanders wake from their slumber to sleep on slippery stones, Then search for a spider lunch in a sticks and stones home Pigeons flock together to peacefully perch on an old brick church. Puddles are...

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THE BEAUTIFUL FLOWER VERSACE STANZA 1 How lovely it sounds, To hear of a Beautiful Flower which profound. Wanting to be with it, for years abound. Going far beyond, To see this Beautiful Flower which Profound STANZA 2 It takes years to reach. It soil in it vase was rich. It colors were pink and peach. You were told that The Beautiful Flower was made by...

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I sat with the mark, sharp and bright, Curved at the tip, a flash of light. "Why the flare?" I asked, "What’s the need, For such a wild, untamed stampede?" With a shudder, it shook, then did confide, "I bring the twist, the rising tide!" "Are you not lonely," I pondered aloud, "In sentences lost in a sea of the crowd?" It...

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You laughed too hard in 1996/ Thought I'd trip and stay down for kicks/ But I climbed back up, twice the size/ Now I shred, watch the sparks fly/ My drummer joked, said guitars are lame/ Left him roadside, questioning fame/ Why does a guitar need a case, he asked/ To contain its stringed up past/ Steel strings bend, the pick obeys/ My...

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