Silly Poems

Henry bought a new hat
Placed it on his head
He thought he looked handsome
So wore his hat to bed
His wife said "It looks cheap
Take that silly thing off your head
And let us get some sleep"...Read More

As a person of lay,
I do watch in dismay.
All these government rubes,
look like fools on our tubes.

Playing these damn silly games,
as they try to bring shame,
on this President Trump
voted in by us "chumps".

No respect for the position,
wasting time, an inquisition.

So...Read More

aint no doubt bout it
aint no shuffling round
me and you together
gotta nice ring
gotta nice sound

aint got me second guessing
aint gotta worry bout silly things
do what you do
let me do my thing
and we'll get along just fine(ahh!)

aint no secret tween you...Read More

The Labor Party of Australia
May well attribute its constant failure
To a silly habit it's goot
Of shooting itself in the foot....Read More

John Brown was pretty fat for his height, 'cos
He snarfed every piece of choc'late in sight
   One night the candy was hid
   So you know what Johnny did?
He went out trick-or-treating like a kid...Read More

Ring, Ring doorbell
What a piercing sound
It is so unexpected
And can make one's heart pound
I get in quite a tizzy
Who can that caller be
I'm really feeling dizzy
As I peeped outside to see
If it is a friendly face
Or is it a dreadful...Read More

The Sitter

They rushed me in. 
I had no time to prepare. 
Talk they said. 
Entertain. 
We will not be... long, 
it was a song.

Fear.
My first response.
Prayer, 
should have been. 
In the end, 
adrenalin and panic
gave way to remembered 
moments with...Read More

An angel disgusted by its shabby wings 
protested angrily with loud whinings: 
“Lord, look at my wings, they’re old and weak; 
I’ll be lucky if they outlast the week. 
I desperately need a new pair to fly. 
Surely you have...Read More

being raised italian 
growing up green
not knowing what
a name meant
just agreeing
familia

so there was
my aunt Romaine
completely sane but 
having the ability to be
quite silly and even now
thoughts of her 

give me a smile and
usually a laugh after
years of happiness
never unlasting or
ever...Read More

Ballerina Blair.
With blonde golden hair.
Made a miss step.
But still full of pep.
Even though she tripped.
Even though she slipped.
She didn't care....Read More

Little John Crumb.
Sucking his thumb.
He got teased by his friends.
His thumb sucking ends.
Because it made him feel dumb....Read More

We’re going on a shopping spree, the wife and I this day,
The only question on my mind ‘how long I need to stay?’
‘Let’s go our separate ways and join up later on’
Is generally the theme, then in a flash she’s...Read More

This is the story of my life,
So filled with joys and strife;
This is the story of my days--
Through countless doorways!

This is the story of my dream--
And of my shimmering moonbeam.
This is my brief tale of woe--
The tale of sunsets all...Read More

Mother magpies defend their young
When it is the nesting season,
Then they are hard to move among.

When it is the nesting season,
Mother magpies are aggressive,
They cannot comprehend reason.

Mother magpies are aggressive,
Set primed and ready to attack,
They are certainly possessive.

Set primed and...Read More

Alex couldn't stop thinking about his mess
It was just so silly and depressed
But he could never forget the pork grease

That morning, Alex encountered a spill express
He had to calm himself with an arrest
Alex couldn't stop thinking about the mess

Later, Alex...Read More

Sell me a toy boat or a boy goat
Make that one boy goat, two toy boats
No: Two boy goats, one toy boat
Wait. Make it one boy goat named Roy Oates

Ha, ha: Back again with soy oats
Soy oats for boy goats,...Read More

For hamburgers hotdogs and french fried potatoes
add the sweet savory sauce a gift from tomatoes
Ketchup Ketchup pour it thick
for bland foods it does the trick

Scramble eggs just to plain
Ketchup adds that sweet tang
Steak a little too dry
that's when ketchup applies
Try...Read More

‘Hello Mister Thompson, please can you take a chair!’
‘This one?’ I asked. She said, ‘no that one over there!’
Now I’m sure I heard a scream, or was is just a shout?
Should I ask the receptionist what the commotion’s all about?

Oh,...Read More

Warm winds sing above green trees,
As crickets chirp in evening's breeze.
And you embrace this tranquil scene -
Dancing naked with sweet Jolene.
 
Playing all day with a crooked broom
whisking troubles from your room.
Leaving just a tranquil space
and a happy smile on...Read More

Don Key the Donkey
Was a silly ass
He had big donkey ears
And wore an eyeglass
Looking very dapper
And extremely smart
It was his day off from pulling his cart
He liked going out
And enjoyed a laugh
As I mentioned earlier
He was daft
He dressed up
And looked...Read More

Should a Sheik seek a shave
Who'd shave a Sheik,
Sheik shavers should surely
So Sheik shavers Sheiks seek.






Entry for
Twist my Tongue Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Nina Parmenter
17/1/2020. Placed 3rd.
...Read More

Sea Lions are funny creatures
I think they are mammals
They have flippers for feet
Not humps like lots of camels

Wouldn't it be funny
A funny sort of weird
If a walrus had a football
And a bunny had a beard

It gets even crazier
The more I...Read More

A bear and his best friend, mouse.
They both lived in a big blue house.
This girl is completely unstoppable.
She could do almost anything possible.
Three friends with the same name, just different spelling.
To make money for jawbreakers, rip-offs they were selling.
This man...Read More

I am typing this poem in a squat position
I cannot sit; the tampon feels strange down there.
Considering the -38 temperature condition
I’d rather stay home than go anywhere.

I want to go out; to the grocery
buy sanitary pads and something from the...Read More

Lucy lisps, Lucy lisps
Lucy's tongue is in a twist
Saucy Susie sang a song
Silly Susie sang it wrong
Slinky slimy slippery snakes
Hisses kisses to their mates
Stoats stay stoic on the sand
While Willy Wagtail forms a band
Bandicoots break into a simple song
Cos Saucy...Read More