Rhyme Funny Poems

( A Funny Christmas Poem )

Twas the night before Christmas, santa was throwing a hissy
Mrs. Claus was laughing at him, and calling him a sissy
He...

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Let’s play hide and go peek said the horse.
It was a great suggestion I agreed of course.
Because I did not know that he had said...

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Elephant dumplings in my soup.
They are tasty and delicious.
Warm and fleshy to boot!
Come on, don’t crowd.  

Elephant dumplings  get them here and now!
They...

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Is my room in such disarray 
That I'm not even seeing straight?
Are those dust bunnies wearing candy wrappers as hats?
Their building an army, I'm under...

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We’re drowning our diners in sugar, it seems -
our food is obesity packaged as dreams!
We really don’t mind about that, sir,
it’s only some kids getting...

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We once had a miniature poodle
Quincy Adams his registered name
We were quite proud of our small pet
As part of the family he became

While walking Quincy...

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Fashion is not my passion
Simplicity is the way for me
One color shirt and a pair of jeans
That's good enough you see
My money's low but spirits high
Although...

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We wore bottle green sweaters
that shrunk to fit snugly
so blossoming bodies
looked suitably ugly,

trapezium skirts
quite devoid of all fun,
though they’d look rather good 
on my Nan,...

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( Disarray )

I dont like inviting guest, cause my house is such a clutter
I just bought 3 endangered cats, and my life is in the...

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Dust in the Attic

The tree, 
I have to take it down. 
It is heavy and I am tired,
before I start. 
That is not going to...

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( Bobby Buried The Body )

Bobby buried the body, I watched this wretched sight
He took his shovel and started to dig, at 6:30 tonight
I tried...

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( Goosebumps )   ( Delilah Ventura ) << Sponsor

There`s 3 kinds of goosebumps, each is a tale
I will tell of how you get...

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A bee and a wasp came by today.
From the land of faeries truly fey.
They zoomed around my autumn flowers.
Bee stayed a bit, wasp stayed for...

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Old Saint Nick was mean on Christmas eve
his reindeers were tired and quite deceived
he wanted to get home so the gifts were heaved
 reindeers now...

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( My Puppy Ate The Christmas Tree )

My puppy ate the Christmas tree, the wildest sight I ever seen
She enjoyed fruit and vegetables, anything that...

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Tim is tall. Handsome.
Works in an office.
Like all of the others
he looks kind of polished.
They say small talk is dead.
So I ask for a date.
The...

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I used to be fragrant, 
my body a playground,
a fountain of more. 
Now I am older -
slack-throated, gape-jawed.
I’m sorry I snore. 

I used to be...

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Fatty Rascal burst into tears

When someone said he had “big ears”

For big ears indeed Fatty had

He got them from his mom and dad

 

His ears...

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The devil did hack God’s computer
And gave it a nasty virus
Now when he tries to upload the sun
All that pops up is, Miley Cyrus
 
God...

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Late night tipsy chats 
So few and far between
Off the charts teasing stats
Then being left here on scene


I was bored just having a bit of...

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