Funny Rhyme Poems

One morning on my route at work,
I drove my truck with mail to serve;
The back was full, where parcels lurk,
As clients wait right by the...

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I think it's time to do an update
Of The Seven Deadly Sins
Most people do not know them all
Sit down and let's begin
I'm not really religious
But,...

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I'm no good in a kitchen but, I can cook stuff all the same
Around here, say "the recipe" and most folks know my name
It hasn't...

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Happy Part 2

Bring a smile 
Bring a laugh
These miserable feelings just won’t last
Grateful of the support now and in the past

Elated and thrilled when you...

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
But he didn't fall deliberately, he was pushed.
He was smahed to pieces when he landed...

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Everybody laughs at my wife because she smokes a corn cob pipe.
She doesn't like it when I complain, she doesn't want me to gripe.
She smokes...

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60 cents coffee machine

I Put $2.00 in
I Got $1.70 change
I thought that was a bit strange
But there was no cup
90 cents it cost me
For a...

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You suffer daily at your office job.
All day long your restless legs bob and bob,
wiggling, quivering--- up, down, left, right.
This antsiness keeps you awake at...

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My wife is even worse than Aunt Bee when she makes pickles.
She gave some to some celebrities and that's what killed Don Rickles.
When people eat...

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I'd like to say it was just a dream but it was real.
The cops arrested me for passing counterfeit bills.
My bank gave me twenty one...

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When my wife found my pot, she thought it was tea.
And her employer fired her after he made her pee.
My dad caught me when I...

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It's no wonder why my parents are despised.
They bought me a car that's been vandalized.
It has the word TURD written on both sides.
When girls see...

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She was faster than a rattlesnake
She could split a log in two
She was better than any hand
I think I ever knew

She was famous all throughout...

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Is there an algorithm in poetry

An informal definition could be 
"a set of rules that precisely defines a sequence of operations"
A program is only an...

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Inspired by Mick Talbot’s message to all participants in his haiku contest.



Mick’s maybe a stickler for the contest rule
He’s only helping so you don’t look...

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There is just NOT enough time
     Barely have the time to rhyme
Alarm sounds off and starts the race
   ...

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Duck under cover
Duck in a pond 
Duck with plum sauce 
Duck yum, yum 
 
Duck flying in the sky 
Duck with bad landing 
Splash you...

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This is it
The perfect pick
But where in the world do I flick it

Thought I had 
This habit kicked
Here is proof I didn't

Maybe if 
I wear...

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Too many obstacles in my way
to get anything done today.

I over slept
called in sick.
Boss got ticked.
Oh well, he'll get
over it.

My head feels like
it's been hit
with...

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How hilarious is being born
with a highly sensitive nature;
this is unmanly and very rare
for someone seldom forlorn. 

If transformation took place on a public stage,
I...

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