Rhyme Funny Poems

If you had a little glitz
You and I could do the splits,
In front of the Hotel Ritz
Did you just call me a ditz?

Come here and...

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Carol is a crocodile with big long pointy teeth,
She likes to hide in lakes under the surface, just beneath.
She doesn’t want to bite your legs...

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Hairy Nora reads the Torah from daybreak until dusk.
She’s got four different colored legs, but not a single tusk.
There’s a birdie sitting on her back...

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Cookie can cook recipes from a book,
She can rustle up meals in a flash.
She wears a chef’s hat even though she’s a cat
And she works...

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“Alf it’s dinner time” cried mum as she finished off the cooking.
“Where is that naughty boy?” She grumbled, “I’d better go a-looking”
She looked across the...

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The Cotswolds are a bunch of hills in rural England's heart
They're green and rolling, full of sheep that frolic, bleat and fart.
People come from far...

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I. AM. POET!
He proclaimed
With great exclamation
As he proceeded to explain
To the rooms great expectations
That he had found a rhyme for orange
...

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Being home by the fire will ease the strain
from being out in this cold miserable rain
the crackling sparks will shed some pain
making me feel I’m...

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Mayo the rabbit has a very strange habit,
but he isn’t a monk or a nun.
He spreads out on ham, lettuce, cheese, bacon, spam
that’s been sliced...

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Carlos the chameleon likes to wave at passersby,
But none of them wave back at him which makes poor Carlos cry.
He stands there by his house...

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The day the asteroid came down the dinosaurs were playing,
With toys and bats and balls and things, some dancing jigs and swaying.
Young Betty Brontosaurus was...

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I didn't get much schooling so I can't read or write.
Many people don't understand my situation and plight.
I thought I was buying sugar but I...

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I forget to remember that I don't like you anymore
I keep trying to dislike everything about you I adore
Deleting every funny emoji that you sent...

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Happy Snappy Ladybug me.
I am as cheerful as you think I ought to be.
I fly brief ways from flower to flower.
Some are tasty, others are...

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Come learn the sad lesson of World War Three.
We fought it against a bizarre enemy
Of our own creation, unwitting and free,
Not guessing they’d dream up...

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I invited a dragon to dinner
(That was almost the wrong thing to do!)
Have you ever seen what a dragon
can do to a bowl of beef...

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My name is Ethel Mary 
And I have to tell you this
I hate it when Aunt Geri
gives a purple garlic kiss!
I hate it when my...

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I missed a blind corner one grim stormy night,
On a dark forest road, with no phone.
The crash was severe, but what gave me more fright
Was...

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Uncomfortable confronting 
your continuous consumption to which you're accustomed, 
the crunch, the chew, it's all you do, 
most munch at lunch while you the whole...

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Purple people eaters pursuing purple peas,
Paraphernalia progressing toward a purple please,
Amethyst bedding, purple clothes, and platform shoes,
Purple violets promoting purple woodland hues,

Purple is out there...

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