Kids Funny Poems

Calendar commences, conviviality,
kids kvetch knishes cold,
cantaloupe crappy,
kids constantly crunching cookies,
cake, candy.
Could kayaking, canoeing, camping
in Canada cure cantankerous
children's contention?
Can caddying at the country club
conquer kid's complaining?
chaos...

Read More

the silver birch
it likes to hide
so as you search 
at eventide
you find it there with many friends
playing poker through the night

the common oak 
a wise...

Read More

      ‘Here come some more of them
        Plenty of little kids too
 ...

Read More

Let’s not make a scene—
not in front of the metaphor-curious.
We owe them a semblance
of shared syllabic stability.

You take Tuesdays,
I’ll keep weekends and the enjambments.
Let’s split...

Read More

I saw her in a meadow high
Where red flowers touch the sky
Her eyes were mournful, so much inside
I looked within, skepticism died

(chorus)
I'm in love with...

Read More

A friend said, rather smugly,
you can't be "pretty ugly";
and where is the good,
and what is the likelihood
of one being "clearly misunderstood"?

An expression he's also dismissing
(or...

Read More

I’m drunk, but you’re beautiful,
a line I used to rehearse.
The Dreamers’ artistic longing felt noble,
but it came with a curse.
I bought the ticket when I...

Read More

There once was a girl from the south
Who had a hard time with her mouth
Boy with same issue said, (S)"poon!"
She said, "Not poon! We...

Read More

When parents tell their offspring 
the definition of a fling
they also include
the story that may sound crude
about the birds and the bees
and Tarzan from the...

Read More

'Twas the night before Christmas at my house
when I heard a noise I knew wasn't a mouse.
And as the kids dreamed fast asleep in bed,
through...

Read More

Jelly roll

Watch em fall
Sadness of a lost season 
No time to reach out and touch a life or a song

Jelly roll
Theres so much a child...

Read More

Barbie, Atari, He-man 
Batman, She-Ra, Ronald Reagan
Lower student loans, and landline phones
The Dark Crystal and around 5.2 billion people 
Andre the Giant’s Honeycomb commercial 
Rainbow...

Read More

Gothic Pets

Must of conjured up three demon cats from the depths of hell
What Halloween mischief does their presence foretell
Cat-lions roar, mincemeat!
Kids scared off with no...

Read More

Barnabas Dracula Kitty

Barnabas darts deep in my closet each dawn
I go feed him at sunset but poof he’s gone
On Halloween night
I spot Barny in flight
His...

Read More

Naughty Children

Naughty children pick their nose's
And smear their clothes
Playful and mischievous
They belong to Jesus

Naughty kids are fast kids
They catch butterflies
With big smiles they show you
How...

Read More