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Best Funny Poems

Below are the all-time best Funny poems written by Poets on PoetrySoup. These top poems in list format are the best examples of funny poems written by PoetrySoup members


Premium Member A funny thing happened on the way to my hanging
A funny thing happened on the way to my hanging
Couldn't sleep the night before my head was banging
I was innocent of a crime that I...

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Categories: brother, funny,
Form: Rhyme



Hard Times
When hard times come they sit a spell,
Like kin folk come to stay
A-packin' troubles, pets an' kids
That always get ‘n your way.
It's drought an' flood,...

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© Jim Fish  Create an image from this poem.
Categories: cowboy-western, family, funny, life,
Form: Cowboy
Premium Member I Think Of You - An Alternative Universe - 6

From childhood it was a world of two...you and I...
I leaned lightly, leisurely against your heart and you let me in.

We were five I use...

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Categories: funny, best friend, cute love,
Form: Prose Poetry
Premium Member The Squirrel
~My Nutty Squirrel Poem~

Up in a tree, on a branch
Now you see me, now you don't!

Sneaky and fast, I'm adorable
Now, why would you hunt or...

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Categories: funny, adventure, animal, beautiful, blessing,
Form: Ballad
Premium Member I want your SEEDS
**"And his name was Jack"**

No one perceives what abides above the clouds. 
A giant, a harp, maybe golden eggs. 
I demand to see and feel...

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Categories: adventure, funny, old, rain,
Form: Free verse



Premium Member Real Men Wear Pink
I stand about five feet eight
I'll admit, I'm a tad overweight
Drive an old pick up truck
Not one to pass the buck
At the moment have a...

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Categories: character, funny, humor, perspective,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member Sweet Sugar Cookies and Peanut Butter Bars
"I dream of Candy!"

Sweet cakes and peanut butter squares 
A living diabetic's nightmare. --  My heart 
sings to the beat, Under the Neutron Star...

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Categories: addiction, candy, fantasy, funny,
Form: Alliteration
Premium Member GREEN- reborn
GREEN, GREEN, GREEN!!!

My name is Jade Shamrock Green.
I will not eat one single green bean.
When I get mad, I turn green.
I wear my favorite green...

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Categories: funny, holidaygreen,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member Just Desserts
I was at my favourite restaurant and I'd had a lovely meal,
if I finished all my food then a pudding was the deal
I’d relished every...

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Categories: food, funny, humorous, rude,
Form: Rhyme
Don't Bother Me
Don't bother me with conformity
don't bother me today-
with things I should (or shouldn't) do
or what I shouldn't say!

Don't bother me with conformity
my house is not...

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Categories: community, funny, how i
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member Dumb Questions
I was changing a tire and the neighbor walked by
Stood and looked a while, then he said Hi
Got a flat? he asked and this made...

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Categories: funny, me, wife, me,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member I Wish I Was An Octopus
I wish I was an octopus,
Way down in the depths of the sea,
With suckers so comical, face diabolical,
Kooky as kooky can be!

Hurray! Hurray! I’d be...

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Categories: animal, fun, funny, humorous,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member How Long
I've never kissed a pig with my eyes closed
Nor have I ever held a hand of time
However, there was once when I proposed
But that was...

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Categories: funny, love, sad,
Form: Sonnet
Premium Member ALWAYS MOTHERS DAY
I have borrowed  the first line of this piece from the"unknown scribe" , which I 
read many years ago.... The rest is for ALL...

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© Sean Kelly  Create an image from this poem.
Categories: funny, mother, thank you,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member BLACK and BLUE
BLACK and BLUE

Today I wonder, 
Wonder why?
You hit me in the eye, 
you made me cry.

My eyes are brown,
Now they're black and blue.
Is that what...

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© SKAT A   Create an image from this poem.
Categories: abuse, funny, husband, me,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member If I Were The One For Nicola
If only I could make my way to Paris
To search the boulevards and rainy rues
I'd look to find my lonely heart an heiress
An Irish lass...

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Categories: funny love,
Form: Sonnet
Coffee
COFFEE

Coffee is my medication,
Savoury warm embrace.
Supplies me with motivation
To get me through rough days.
Should I stumble, should I fall,
I’ll get a kick at ten.
Java is...

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Categories: funny,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member Americans Can't Spell
You Americans really can’t spell,
There, I’ve said it out loud - what the hell!
Though we all recognise,
And, yes, humour your tries,
Well, the fact is, you’ve...

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Categories: fun, funny, humor, humorous,
Form: Limerick
Premium Member The Turnip and the Cabbage
A Turnip and a Cabbage
    are walking down the street.
This may seem a might peculiar 
    as they hadn't...

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Categories: adventure, funny,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member To Hunt the Bugaboo
The morning was crisp and frosty
    as the Earth yearned for autumn's heat.
Darkness gave way to a fractured dawn
   ...

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Categories: funny, humor, humorous,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member Mimes at My Funeral
When my time is done and I am finally laid to rest
I don’t want to be recalled as one who lived life depressed

So as I...

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Categories: funeral, funny, humor, life,
Form: Couplet
A Tribute to a Major Appliance
Sub-titled: What’s in YOUR Fridge?

Please allow me to introduce myself:
My name is Ms. Fridge A. Daire
I stand tall among my lesser cohorts
and MOST of them...

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Categories: funny, humorous, relationship,
Form: Personification
A Bad Day at the Eye Doctor's- a true story
"It was 6 or 7 years ago
Or so I'd like to think
I traveled to my eye doctor..
(I should'a seen a "shrink"!!)

My dad and I we...

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© tom bell  Create an image from this poem.
Categories: funny, life, mystery, me,
Form: Burlesque
Premium Member Little Miss Spring
They say it's a time to slip in the mud, and begin anew.
Kick off the dust of yester ...
      and...

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Categories: funny, adventure, appreciation, beauty, crazy,
Form: Light Verse
Premium Member Doggy Style
The eighties set fashion on fire,
That’s why it’s the look I desire!
So I’ve nailed it, long-term,
With a hot poodle perm,
Just like Brian May, Cher and...

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Categories: beauty, dog, fun, funny,
Form: Limerick