I am a mouse, I am I am
I am a mouse, I am
The sort you would surely kill
If you found me in your house.
I am a rat, I am I am
I am a rat, I am
Your voice would suddenly go shrill
If you found me in your hat.
SOUP TROUPE (CM)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
peer group, Soup group
write verse, scribe troop
Admittedly, I am a big klutz;
tripping and falling, it drives me nuts.
With my "two left feet",
I am no athlete,
but I'm willing to dance - it takes guts!
There was an old maid in the square
Who tripped over her very long hair,
She grabbed a street lamp
Performed a pole dance
And everyone gave her a cheer.
An old man was approaching that square
And he tripped while descending the stairs
He did a cartwheel
Then tapped on his heels
Said Ginger, here’s your Fred Astaire!
STUMBLE AND RISE (Gravity and I)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A gala event, a minefield of hope and dread,
Winners announced, toward the stage were formally led.
My name was called; I tripped, planting my face on the floor,
Embarrassed was I, my ego damaged, my pride done for.
“Gravity and I are in a toxic relationship,” I said, my face turning red.
I tripped and stumbled over my big feet
While walking down a very crowded street.
With laughter I arose
Assumed a dancing pose
Then tripped the light fandango really neat.
HEADING FOR VENEZIA
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Young Syd, a squirrel with adventurous spirit most keen,
Bought 1925 roadster, a vintage touring machine.
With top down, tail flapping in the breeze,
The goddess of freedom he was sure to appease.
Popular was he, once featured in ‘Roadster Fanzine.’
Oh how Syd loved the roadster’s crushed velvet seats
Sinking in them as he raced down the city streets.
Waves to all the she-squirrels, feeling outta sight
Spends his dough dancing with them on Saturday nights.
Low on cash, Syd uses his roadster delivering food for UberEATS
That’s when he meets the she-squirrel named Aretha,
a singing diva who always orders lots of pepperoni pizza.
*Oh these city streets move way too slow, don’t you know.
Let’s go riding on the freeway! Drop the pedal, Syd. Go, go, go!
So they cruise onto better-than-ever street heading straight for Venezia.
Receiving a pie in the crown,
It just might occasion a frown.
But bear well in mind,
One always will find,
The target is never the clown.
In the cramped font room we’d sit and stare
At the telly on the blink needing care.
With a slap on its head,
While the cussing instead
Was more entertaining than the fair.
SNAIL MAIL
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Young Stu, with his shell brown and bold,
From the forest post office, he slowly strolled.
With letters packed on his back galore,
With slime as his tires, he slowly went to each door,
"Your snail mail's arrived!" he extolled.
“You fool! Haven’t you heard of email?” badger exclaimed
“Of all your slowness, you should be ashamed.
“With the click of a mouse
You no longer deliver from house to house.”
“But, but…I’ll lose my job,” Stu proclaimed.
“Oh, Stu, you’re so uninformed, so old school.
Your skill set you must totally retool!
Have you not heard of UPS or perhaps FedEx?
You can deliver packages and other objects!
“But snails don’t drive. You’re such a fool!”
“Besides, I’m looking forward to my postal pension
Not to mention days without strife and tension.
And all those Forever Stamps I’ve amassed
I’ll sell online or on my webcast.
Then with Musk I’ll travel to space, otherworldly dimensions.”
(“Loyalty Merit Badge”, 2010, original oil)
Religion of Dog
Religions come in all shapes and sizes
Some good, some not so much.
But what would a religion of dog be like?
Kind, devoted and loyal, willing to please
And to defend, and be happily conditioned.
These would be the attributes of its followers
But what of the essence of its theological tenants?
Love, eternal vigilance, situational awareness
And of course joy
In a long walk or good play of tug or frisbee.
A religion of dog after all would be grounded
With it’s main focus the here and now,
Maybe not a zen focus
Maybe even more Dionysian,
But certainly within this
The values of family and pack
Would be supreme,
And this after all is not much different
Than all the human religions.
The difference which would make all the difference
Would have more to do with the wag.
(9/8/25)
Flying past the hillsides,
flying pat the bays,
flying past the cabin
where I might just like to say.
Flying past the tall trees,
branches scrape my feet,
’tis the finest jetpack
you can buy with money.
Ain’t no toil,
in my jetpack royal,
my view is unspoiled
in my jetpack royal,
so high the blood boils
in my jetpack royal,
the schemes that I’ll foil
in my jetpack royal.
Flying through the cities,
over the suburbs,
flying past the park where
kids by swings wait their turn.
Flying over mountains,
past the birds of prey,
the eagles give strange looks
then dive out of my way!
Ain’t no toil,
in my jetpack royal,
my view is unspoiled
in my jetpack royal,
so high the blood boils
in my jetpack royal,
the schemes that I’ll foil
in my jetpack royal.
Oh, free flying,
so high and free,
I wish you had
a jetpack like me.
If I had cash
I’d buy you one,
we’d soar up high
and have too much fun!
Ain’t no toil,
in my jetpack royal,
my view is unspoiled
in my jetpack royal,
so high the blood boils
in my jetpack royal,
the schemes that I’ll foil
in my jetpack royal.
DARK SYMPHONIES
Tuned frogs and crickets,
Challenging my ear’s scorings:
Last night’s symphonies:-
My parents gave me love and hugs
and told me just say no to drugs.
Now, this is really just a guess,
but if I'm talking to drugs,
then I think I've said "Yes"!
There once was a robot with a fixed stare
That met a lion on the thoroughfare.
When faced with the real thing
Its poor heart went ‘ting’
As he repeated on a loop, ‘No. Scared.’
Specific Types of Humorous Poems
Read wonderful humorous poetry on the following sub-topics:
adults, birthday, christmas, death, friends, friendship, graduation, kids, life, love, middle school, rhyme, school, silly, teachers
and more.
Definition | What is Humorous in Poetry?
Poems Related to Humorous
amusing, comic, entertaining, facetious, funny, hilarious, joke, joking, laugh, laughing, ludicrous, merry, playful, pleasant, priceless, side splitting, witty, whimsical