Silly Humorous Poems

grandma’s socks 
were hollyhocks

her jumper
juniper

her skirt
was a wort
with a yellowness
but

some days she wore
a purpleness sort

squirm and squirm
and writhe and dance
as grandma’s undies
were nettle pants




...

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rhino and chimp in the knife and fork drawer
a baker baking bread on the ocean floor
jumble jumble
indoor shed
oh someone put the oak tree back to...

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You collect old bottle caps 
and belly button lint. 
I don't find you strange; 
I find you endearing. 

And maybe it's because 
we're both locked...

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fine trousers wore the goblin
pockets full of goblin hands

fine scarf wore the goblin
tucked into some goblin pants

fine brogues wore the goblin
laces full of goblin craft

fine...

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jam

it’s
sweeter than ham
stickier than a dam
spreadier than a ram
welcomier than spam
jarier than a can
jellier than a plan

though
not drivier than a van
not talkier than a man
not...

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The Zebra has a puzzling name,
Alphabet letters strangely cast,
It finishes off with the first,
After starting off with the last!

The Zebra is a cunning beast,
It blends...

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i'm in a muppet mood today ~
suffering from a persisting hangover
i woke up silly stuffed and wabbly
goofy looney and scatterbrained
with bulging eyes and a bad...

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A man from Connecticut found
His legs would not reach to the ground.
“I wish I was shorter,”
He told a reporter,
“To stop all this floating around.”
...

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a horse named
Lollipop
dug a hole

a mole
told Lollipop
to stop

but Lollipop
dug
dug
dug

so the mole
trotted with a
clipperty clop



...

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diddly dole
diddly dole
a goblin ate the custard
from the trifle bowl

diddly dole
diddly dole
another ate the jelly
and the trifle – stole!



...

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squake the guisely skwallard
there’s pudding in the fridge
but leave a siley pappledoth
for the midnight gobbleditch

let it eat a munchinfless
and skreel a throbbledue
hide and hope the...

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dessert door dessert door
opens to custard and cream
but jester broke in
with bells and a spoon
. . . and
off with his head!
said the queen

dessert door dessert...

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Yesterday I thought of going to the gym
for a minute considered going for a swim
then I remembered I had better things to do
convinced I could...

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he belched 
and belched

his giblets fraught

he burped 
a burp

his gizzards ought
to churn and turn
his entrails wrought

when up rose up
a belch and burp

then in both hands
his...

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An Irishman with a small willy
Was hoping for nookie with Milly
Said, "I'll still make you squirm
with my tiny lil worm"
But Milly said, "Don't be so...

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