Christmas Humorous Poems

'twas 'pon a Venice 24-hour layover, when two male members of our airline crew had quite the separate, yet different, adventure.

Flight attendant Number One, who...

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May your annual commemoration
of the winter solstice
with one of the Earth's poles
at its maximum tilt from the sun
be abundant with innumerable manifestations
of felicity friends good...

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Gonifs and gossips revisited

since originally being crafted
approximately half dozen
dirty deeds done dirt cheap years ago...

Abound and lurk
within every nook and cranny
analogous to some annoying pest
harmless...

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Give me a kiss under the mistletoe
as
Christmas comes but once a year
gathering friends and family near
and
if X is a kiss is kissmas a word
if it...

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Scots golfers do not 'golf'
as they say in the U.S.A.
invented in Scotland
it's as they ought
a sport the Scottish play
the first tennis player
known by name
(Louis X)
did...

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the silver birch
it likes to hide
so as you search 
at eventide
you find it there with many friends
playing poker through the night

the common oak 
a wise...

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What's going on with Mike and Molly

They built their house in boughs of holly

But when Christmas arrived 

And no holly survived 

We called it Mike...

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Snow is rain
with a playful
chill -- gaily
floating, gliding
bored with a ping
and a spill -- 

children, likewise
though fond of a dip and
a stroke, also love to...

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Poor Rudolph had a broken leg. It happened on the day
he was to lead the reindeer with Santa on his sleigh.
They say it was an...

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A unique Christmas time for Santa Claus,
fiftieth year of journey without pause.
     All gifts he stacks in the cart,
  ...

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I saw an object 
way-up high -- 
analysis, no UFO
no drone, told my
supervisor, no need
for the military red-phone.  

Again:

I saw a sled
way up-high --...

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Santa, Elf and Rudolph argued about - 
Whose charisma Christmas can’t do without. 
Santa bragged all human kind 
Loves him as a mastermind. 
Elfy turned...

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This December 17th, 2024...

alternately titled: a literary retrospective when holiday times living hand to mouth in Penn Valley fraught with slim pickings and yours truly...

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There is a moment every single year
Such a joyful one without a tear
The tree is up, the food purchased
Delivered present, friends embraced
With time taken out...

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In "A Christmas Carol" by Charles Dickens
there are four notable ghosts or apparitions;
and of that quartet of wondrous ghosts
the Ghost of Christmas Presents is the...

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