Best Humorous Poems

At the footbridge Sue was meeting her beau
(He was married to a woman called Flo)
Sue soon found out his deception
She dismembered his ********
For his love...

Read more of this work...

Wouldn't you rather~

Wouldn't you rather be dead?
Maybe shoot yourself in the head?
Over my dead heart, I'd never want to be a zombie like you.
The sight...

Read more of this work...

Poor Peter Pumpkin had a very itty bitty head.
So the farmer made him stay inside the garden bed.

The farmer said that he was going to...

Read more of this work...

Introducing: Nate & Linda

The smile on my lips
is forced and coerced
I pretend to pay attention
give the best possible advice
everyone praises me
I'm so kind, polite and...

Read more of this work...

Don't bother me with conformity
don't bother me today-
with things I should (or shouldn't) do
or what I shouldn't say!

Don't bother me with conformity
my house is not...

Read more of this work...

t         e         t      ...

Read more of this work...

I want conversations 
with writers and poets
The wise the wacky 
the dark and the stoic 
I need to drink your words
I fear my disease is...

Read more of this work...

I was at my favorite restaurant and I'd had a lovely meal,
if I finished all my food then a pudding was the deal
I’d relished every...

Read more of this work...

Ted’s libido has now gone astray
He refused a quick roll in the hay
So what could be the cause -   
It’s the male menopause...

Read more of this work...

You probably don't think much of me
save for the season of spring
when your lawn litters itself
with giant over-buttered popcorn

(birds that think they can sing,
supersonic sneezes?
those...

Read more of this work...

My turds float like choc’late marshamallows
Just lurking about in the shallows
I guess that my butt
Is truly kaput
So doctor suggests bitter aloes

I questioned such treatment regime
Doc...

Read more of this work...

Oh cripes I’ve gotta tell yer of a horror ride I had,
	That beat any bronc or bull I’ve rode, and I must say I’m glad,
	I’ll...

Read more of this work...

JAN HAS A FAN


Jan Has no Tan

I once saw a gal called Jan
So sexy she made me ran
Straight to the vicar
Said marry us quicker
Whilst she...

Read more of this work...

Envious Ivy was her name
I’d buy something new – she’d put me to shame
My designer coat in a shade of emerald green
Ivy bought an identical...

Read more of this work...

Hot date
Can’t wait

We're at
My flat

Cute eyes
Nice thighs

Admit
She’s fit

So sweet
Must eat

We dine
Sublime

First Kiss
Sheer bliss

Soft peck
On neck

Tongue's twirl
Toes curl

First base
Hearts race

Undressed
Bare breast

Blimey
She’s ‘HE’

No joy
Ladyboy

Fussy
Pussy

Night ends
As friends

Written by...

Read more of this work...