Facetious Poems

Sensations

"And my thoughts are all sensations"
And my sensations are all my thoughts.
The sun controls the moon,
and the moon controls me.

She said she was a she/they/we,
and we just laughed. Not
her we, just us.

And my thoughts are all sensations,
we'll only ever be as smart as your sun.

But the sun controls the moon,
and the moon controls we. 
You've heard this before, haven't you?

And my sensations are all my thoughts,
arbitrary thoughts, facetious thoughts,
as we see my body walking into the ocean,
but we're only on dry sand, dry land,
with a pen in our hand

writing down the same words,
over and over again -
Categories: facetious, 12th grade, beauty, dream,
Form: Free verse

Premium MemberLeo The Lion

I'm Leo the Lion, I am, I am
From the mystical world of Astrology
I'm generous, strong and warmhearted
That's if you believe in symbology

Not making this up, check it out
Masculine, positive and extroverted
If I listen too carefully, my head will swell
Which should definitely be averted

My wife suggested widening the doorways
Or I might severely injure my brain
Methinks my honey's being a bit facetious
But I love her a bunch just the same

I'm Leo the Lion, I am, I am
Just a fun loving guy who enjoys life
They also say I'm very broad-minded
Love broads but don't tell my wife
Categories: facetious, children, mom,
Form: Cinquain


theze facetious movez


            mostly
       az mine feets
            tramp
             hop
             skip
            jump
     from the town’z
            bully

            both
       mine dukes
           theirn medius unpainted phalanges
             Up
 


*Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary
 “Facetious” joking or jesting often
  inappropriately
Categories: facetious, anti bullying,
Form: Dramatic Verse

Premium MemberTitillating Trait

My trump suit against lifelong tragic tone 
Lodged leisurely inside my funny bone. 

By dismal doom I decline to abide -
I crack it up to a facetious side. 

In each pickle, regardless size and shape, 
There is a laughing matter in a jape. 

When unwelcome hiccups simmer and spout, 
I’d pick and poke something to smirk about. 

For every spiteful slap and whopping whip
There’s an amusing snicker of a quip. 

Farcical figures of speech I’d pour on - 
Absurd, irony or oxymoron. 

When on the dark my mindset dares to dwell, 
Biting sarcasm and sharp satire mix well. 

Last not least parody’s comical spin 
Converts my frown into a happy grin. 

Don’t sweat to second my funny bone, folks - 
I chuckle and chortle at my own jokes. 

Speaking of which the punch line in the pun - 
And so I lived to die for - having fun! 

April 23, 2023

Sponsor: Angela Tune 
Contest: Character Traits
Categories: facetious, humorous,
Form: Rhyme

Premium MemberThe Weaker Sex

The Weaker Sex

Blemishes appear
when innocence dissipates;
although considered
facetious and offensive,
the weaker sex bear the scars.
Categories: facetious, abuse, discrimination, woman, women,
Form: Tanka


Empty

Everyone wears the faces of a thousand facets of themselves
turning phrases to gestures to jokes
A different side for every face they see
Presenting themselves as a gift for the worthy only
Lately I can only see facetious smiles of fake cordiality
It's a cold breeze over colder waters
It's an abstract pain that only hurts when I'm surrounded and lonely
A sunburn whose fires simmer until prodded to life
Despite efforts and smiles and comments I am irrelevant 
So here I remain
Empty
Categories: facetious, life, pain, social, solitude,
Form: Free verse

Her First Name Is Precious

Her first name is Precious: 
A saleswoman not anxious
To flee from shop not spacious
For another with items more luscious!

That’s, perhaps, why she is Precious:
Twenty years but ever gracious,
Even when praises had got fictitious
And flashed smiles goddamned facetious...
A youth but hasn’t been vicious 
Over her feeding, poorly nutritious

Some influence names have on their bearer
Simply find one and try getting nearer.
Categories: facetious, appreciation, beauty, character, humanity,
Form: Rhyme

Premium MemberTick Tock

I saw
The candle burning
Casting shadows
Over solemn faces

Tick tock
Goes the clock

People are born to die

I'm just afraid
Because I'm no longer afraid

Dreams of gold
Embossed statues
And everlasting joy
Crumbled to nothing

Look at how tired these faces are
With one dead the rest are soon to follow

Like dominoes we all begin to fall

We're just liquid
Before a colander

Faces fade in facetious fatigue
I'm out of my depth and in the wrong league
Tear down the signs and banners
And what do you have

A generational depression
Dealing with the end of all times

You saw what I saw when you saw it

Tick tock
Goes the clock
Categories: facetious, death, depression, how i
Form: Free verse

Premium MemberDo Or Not Do, There Is No Try


Yoda, Master of the Jedi Knights.
From the movie, “Star Wars”

Winners:DO
Losers : TRY

Trying is boring and so tedious,
Like list making, oh, my, how facetious!
Don’t buffalo your friends with the word, try.
Nor splash them with the false reasons, why!

Yes, it is unfortunately en Vogue if truth be told.
We cannot with our truth be bold!
Hiding like frightened ants from obvious reality.
Life does not work,with zero integrity!

Your word, is your most valuable asset.
If you don’t have it, my friend, you are naught.
And with no money, can it be bought.
Let us keep our word,so highly sought!

                      6/24/2021
Categories: facetious, courage, inspiration,
Form: I do not know?

Premium MemberIndestructible


The ambiance of beautiful love,
cannot be erased by trash talk.
Tis the feast and forte of a peasants' walk.


Were you actually there that spring night?
Whence cometh your facetious insight?


To put to death, a lover's joyous quest? 
Joyful depths of her reality, she hath shared 
with thee!


Where soft secrets were shared, of these your 
mind is bare!
Thus remove your dagger from her bleeding heart, 
so tender, divinely rare!


And from her honest thoughts, expect no more.
Outcast, thou be from her intimate soul, forevermore!

           12/13/2020
Categories: facetious, betrayal,
Form: Couplet

Diy Have You Any Tools I Need 2 Fix

Someone reached out
and asked me

Have you any tool's ?

A question to which i replied 

Are you trying to be funny
or facetious

Why apart from me the greatest
tool of them all

So much so it's become my nickname

As i am both a spanner and a nut
and the box 

People dig out to use when
in need of release and temporary
fix to plug a shticky connotation

A sort or sense of D.I.Y for those
who can't help themselves

That some feel sorry and pitty
for but deep down i appreciate

As without it or take it away
from me what else would i have
to live for

This is me this is my life but
granted it's not a life for everyone
myself included

But i haven't come across a tool 
in my many box of tricks to fix
or repair the few littke nuts i 
still have left

Guess something's like bridge's
we're never meant to be fixed 
or crossed

Otherwise there would be
1 tool for everything and
only 1 box formed in the
shape of a coffin
Categories: facetious, slam,
Form: Free verse

Home

he ancestral house seemed smaller, today seen with eye glasses
The pathway seemed shorter, the mangoes grow loftier
It was once open field across the hill
Mushrooming subdivisions had blossomed
The little flower orchard had vanished

But anyhow we felt it would still be remembered
Harrowingly different, but pretty much the same

There was an unfamiliar children’s “bahay-bahayan”
On that path that we arranged
In front of that sagging waiting shed that stands
Beside the curve, where the old Mango tree grew

Surprisingly, forty years folded one summer day
And hurriedly become a springtime of our memory
of many growing trees, of many festivities
a spot where I wept one night after my mother died
and spent longer, in starry-starry nights holding newborn offspring
Yes....it is all there, in that small ancestral home

Facetious, but I'm glad they kept the wooden parrot
It has the same green eyes
That big black statue of St. Roque, along a stony pathway that we laid
still sits behind the curve, where the old mango tree grew
Categories: facetious, allusion, beautiful, color,
Form: Enclosed Rhyme

Premium MemberLeo the Lion

I'm Leo the Lion, I am, I am
From the mystical world of the Astrology
I'm generous, strong and warmhearted
That's if you believe in symbology

Not making this up, check it out
Masculine, positive and extroverted
If I listen too carefully, my head will swell
Which should definitely be averted

My wife suggested widening the doorways
Or I might severely injure my brain
Methinks my honey's being a bit facetious
But I love her a bunch just the same

I'm Leo the Lion, I am, I am
Just a fun-loving guy who enjoys my life
They also say I'm very broad-minded
Love broads but don't tell my wife!
Categories: facetious, fun,
Form: Quatrain

Premium MemberPerpetual Melting of Snow- -

facetious, about
rock in every snowball
melting of the snows

little, coconut
as I remember, snowballs
perpetual snow

1/13/20
Written words by James Edward Lee Sr. 2020©
Categories: facetious, analogy, miracle, snow, visionary,
Form: Haiku

Oh Alice

Oh Alice how I envy you and you're wonderland chasing little white rabbits, one Cheshire cat and his facetious wide toothed grin, the songs of flowers on a golden afternoon and lets not forget poetic caterpillars with poems of crocodiles as he illustrates every bit with cloudy opium plooms even falling down your rabbit hole was such a wonder to see oh how I envy you Alice even when you're running from the red queen I've fallen down a rabbit hole and there's no wonder here for me and now here I am it's dark and cold I'm all alone my worst fears have come to be
Categories: facetious, dream, emotions, fantasy, imagination,
Form: I do not know?

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