I have some weird feelings.
The feeling when you run away from home and you forgot your umbrella…
…But it hasn’t rained yet, so maybe you’ll be ok…
I’m too young to have learned to pack enough sweatshirts.
You want to have enough clothes packed.
Forever.
Don’t forget to bring a toothbrush.
I have to find some way to remember…
Smell some flowers you’ve never smelled.
They might be poisonous.
But that doesn’t matter these days.
Heaven is when you have a weird feeling.
Wearing an old t-shirt.
Reaching for-
The accident.
Waiting for my car to be repaired.
They said it would take awhile.
Maybe my car will be ok.
I never got a call from my insurance company though.
Maybe my car is alive out there.
But that’s the last I heard from the other side.
If I got hit by a car 2 years ago,
I would’ve called you.
And I would’ve ranted about how the driver was drunk
and I wasn’t even in the road,
and you’d make a joke about how he was aiming for me
to get my number from the insurance company.
And it would make me laugh hard enough
to forget my legs were broken.
If we ever made it to college,
you’d have been my emergency contact.
But 2 years ago,
I got hit by something worse than a car
and you didn’t pick up the phone,
so I had to deal with a broken spirit and no cure.
So, I’m grateful 2 years ago my contact was my mom,
but what do I do now?
Because I’m scared no one will answer my calls,
no matter who I write down.
In 1 week, it will have been 2 years since we fell apart,
and I always hoped I’d have a new contact by now.
And I do,
someone that made me wonder
why I ever wanted to call you in the first place.
Psalm 50:15
If you cannot help falling ill,
Maybe, best is blithe be and chill.
But if you be discreet
And decide to have it,
With prayers do send your claim bill.
It is your truth versus their stealth,
Who’d carp, contest your claim
And deny Refund Dame,
They, not in business of good health,
Would rather win for them good wealth.
________________________
Happenings |19.12.2024|humour, health
Poet’s note: Medical insurance is in news these days. First there was this hospital in Gujarat that performed operations never needed just to claim insurance money from government’s scheme for old people. Then, an insurance company CEO was killed in USA by a disgruntled policy holder denied the claim. Yet, public sympathy does not seem to be with the CEO who lost his life. Strange, but true. Medical insurance is very expensive, claim settlement iffy and dicey. And yet, not to have one is very risky. This ditty dwells on this dilemma.
So, a rich surfer kid with multiple degrees
whacks a rich CEO of a health insurance company
and suddenly he's the robin hood of the A.I generation
feeding the blood of the rich and greedy
to the uninsured and needy.(top that Greta Thunberg)
Folks this is simply another facet of
the redistribution of wealth
Part of the great reset that they had promised us.
Where the middle class pays the premiums of the poor
getting hammered once again.
While the elites and forever politicians
watch the widening division
from atop the insider trading hill
a thickening layer of sedimentation
Far above the unfruited flood plain
unblemished.
My husband has a perk with his insurance
They provide two thousand dollars worth of free stuff a year
We think vitamins are included, they are not
We think Kleenex are included.
We are also wrong.
My husband discovers they have their own store.
Everything in this store is fair game to be free.
I sit at a computer for a couple of hours spending it all.
Fifty-six boxes of goods arrives in the next week.
Where to store it?
I will have to figure it out.
This is our last year for this perk.
This insurance company is dropping Kansas residents next year.
Like he’d done for forty years he placed their breakfast on the table. But since the stroke his wife had little appetite for food anymore. He turned on the morning news while she sat and stared out the window. Later in the garden he picked tomatoes and she watched the sun fall below an orange horizon.
As darkness crept into the house, they undressed and prepared for bed. He whispered, “I love you.” To which she had no reply.
While searching for her the next morning, he saw the check from the life insurance company laying unopened on the table.
flowers born in spring
bloom brightest in summer days
wither in winter
[I got approved today for another procedure
In the old days, a procedure was a surgery,
Nowadays the insurance company approves
It’s something akin to commercial burglary!]
A surgery used to mean a long hospital stay
But a procedure, you’re in-and-out in a day,
They send you home with pain and a pill
The pain really sets in when you get the bill.
You get a form to fill out how well they did
Yes, as though you’d know, it’s all so stupid.
Take it from me, best to go in by ambulance
No waiting for hours to be seen…perchance
They rush you right into an emergency room,
Before your infected appendix goes ka-boom.
Feeling poorly, being grumpy is hardly a sin
Try to go with the flow, take it on the chin,
Keep in mind the doctors are doing their best
To keep your heart beating inside your chest.
Written May 27, 2022
There is a fake cripple named Mary.
She is scheming to bilk an insurance company.
Three saps live in the flat just below.
Mary's plan is something they don't know.
The three are willing to vouch in her behalf.
How they cook breakfast for her is a laugh.
Each one of these guys is an absolute jerk.
They hang posters for a hypnotist where they work.
Are you wondering what the conclusion will be?
Get the video, and have a look-see.
Based on the 1949 Columbia Pictures short subject "Hokus Pokus" starring the Three Stooges.
I’m an insurance Auto damage appraiser....So yesterday I had to inspect a car for an older gentleman and called him to setup the appointment. I told him I needed to inspect his car for the insurance company and I would be there around noon time. He said I’m fixin to go on my weekly trip to Dallas and I’m getting ready to leave. I said oh wow, I’ve always wanted to go there and asked if he was flying or will he be driving the car with him....there was about 5 seconds of nobody talking so I broke the awkward silence and said, gotta love them Cowboys! More silence. I was beginning to think oh boy Robbie. You’ve done it again. He probably meant Dallas Georgia which is two hours away and not Dallas Texas a few thousand miles away. He finally said I’m gonna leave the car in the driveway for you to inspect but I won’t be there because I have to go to DIALYSIS. I’m sure he was thinking...what kind of Brokeback Mountain fool is this talking about loving cowboys and flying. ??????????????????????? ??
I bought a house that nobody else wanted.
I got it dirt cheap because it was haunted.
It was once owned by a murderess and nobody could trust her.
Things got so bad in that house that I called the Ghostbusters.
But those four women came running out of that house as fast as they could.
I thought that hiring those women was a great idea but it didn't do any good.
Everybody who lived in that house ended up in a bad shape.
The last straw came when the ghost cornered me and I was raped.
I burned down that house for the insurance because things were so creepy and odd.
But the insurance company found out and now I've been sentenced to prison for fraud.
Where I live, a bunch of idiots work at the DMV.
They proved that by giving a drivers license to me.
When I drive, I constantly drive in the wrong lane.
Some people call me stupid, others call me insane.
If you're on the same road while I'm driving,
you won't have much of a chance of surviving.
I've wrecked so many cars that my insurance company no longer pays.
If you ever see me driving in your neighborhood, you really should pray.
If you're out walking while I'm driving, you sure will need to get out of my way.
Because if you don't, your next of kin will be informed that you've passed away.
I drive extremely bad during the night and even worse in the rain.
When I die, my body will be donated to science but they won't accept my brain.
When people see me coming, they lose bladder control and pee.
The gospel truth is that even drunk drivers drive better than me.
My personal physician
says I’m the picture of perfect health
Then he hands me the pharmaceutic scripts
Dr. Miyagi
makes me wonder sometimes,
if he’s a paid health insurance company shill
Seeing how there’s fifty bottles of medicine
on my monthly HMO bill
Metformin
Deseryl
Glyburide
Lisinopril
Every day the bottles say,
I gotta take fifty pills
But the side effects will give you deadly cold chills
Nausea,
diarrhea
Constipation,
insomnia
Me keeping well
is profitable to somebody I can tell
Just pop open the caps,
and watch your thoughts congeal
Bactrim
Gabapentin
Amneal
Indomethacin
Taking fifty pills is waking zombie time
My staying well feels like being sentenced
to a life imprisonment crime
Always feeling sick just to stay healthy,
going to sleep is the only time I feel good
So, I bequeath this advice in my will:
if you wanna die painfully slow, then take fifty pills
Will the person driving behind me kindly back off please?
You are driving way too close, and it’s not putting me at ease.
For every ten miles per hour of traveling speed,
there is one car length of distance that you need.
That is a fundamental rule when you are on the go.
The state’s division of motor vehicles wants everyone to know.
What will happen if I suddenly have to put on my brakes?
You could find yourself in my back seat, for goodness sakes!
Besides, I pay enough in premiums to my insurance company.
Involvement in an accident is not a good way to meet me.
a glimpse into life
insurance company light
the more the merrier
Taking a course of being a secretary
Typewriter on the table is ready
My hands are aching to hit the letters
Speed depends on the movements of my fingers
A basic instrument of communication
You have to familiarize with the hands-on
Busy hands needs to type as many words
It’s like having a competition with swords
Manual way of making documents for you and for me
You have to be sure to type the words and letters correctly
Bond papers, liquid erasers, and a heavy type writer
The complete set to accomplish the mission as typist
Typewriters will be remembered as the years go by
Modern computers will not beat its quality even if I buy
April 25, 2013
For Craig's Contest "The Typewriter"
Note:
I worked as a secretary in an insurance company before and I used typewriter for making documents, letters, etc. and missed using it for a long time... (^_^)
Related Poems