Humor Poems | Examples of Humor Poetry

David the Dendrite (it means Tree-Dweller) how the people loved this eccentric fellow for three years he lived in a tree yes he was the saint of Thessaloniki (real title is written in the Greek alphabet but oh no you can't use 'special characters')...

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Far be it from me to lecture others on best methods for success -- myself no paradigm. In my defense, though, many of us are hardest on ourselves, less critical and gracefully lenient when it comes to others -- But with self, constantly aware of every pimple, even those well hidden – I often wonder why so many of us bother to even own mirrors? (reflections so subjective) Too...

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Her pregnancy was like an open book quite readable with just a cursory look. She wore a gown that trailed in white and grinned a guiltless smile as bright. And why not, white was only a tradition, her virginity a sold out first edition. ...

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So too much is enough, do I think? Though I never get too much of pink, in an outdoors type of loo where there is too much of poo, well, too much is enough of THAT stink!...

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Bed how I love thee Let me count the ways …. Always ready when I am sleepy And in need to rest my weary bones You keep me warm and cosy Are the best company when l feel alone You comfort me when I am unwell Help me to mend and heal Are there when I need to escape the world, When life's...

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Q: How does film actress Meryl get censored on Jimmy Kimmel? A: With a Streep bleep. Q: What are Russian citizens doing to show approval for President Vladimir? A: They're rootin' for Putin. Q: What flower is named for a missing legendary aviation pioneer? A: The Amelia Camelia. Q: What would the French knight do when he started flirting with Guinevere? A:...

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A pet gargoyle. Has carved out eyes. Follows you around. Haunted. Jumps around throughout time and space. Yet doesn’t seem to move at all. Heavy wings. Waits for the right time. If you pat his head? He growls. But you think it’s a hallucination. There’s nothing better than a pet gargoyle. He sure is haunted. He usually keeps his...

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My boring dentist named Phil attacked my teeth with his drill Didn’t need Novocaine to ease any pain went numb on seeing his bill...

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Sudsy sudsy little squirrely tooted in the tub woopie woopie bubbly bubbly he is so so cuddly Little peanut happy as can be, Tee Hee! fluky fluky one little bubble went up his little nosey thats why he did a little sneeze weezy, ...

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At one time tobacco was king Today it’s cannabis and hemp Seems they are Moe, Curly and Larry While tobacco is stuck being Shemp ...

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Thank you for calling Your Destruction. If you’re calling to bring forth your personal hell, press 1. If you’re calling for emotional devastation, press 2. If you’re calling to enact physical harm, press 3. …Thank you. Your Destruction is now offering a summer sale. If you are interested, please fill out the survey on Your Destruction website. …Please hold…please hold…please hold…please...

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vessel captivates warm waxing finesse waning more color less stress glowing going with flowing lugubrious globular! vibrant pink guava incandescent liquid groove~ pahoehoe lava ...

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Flackmoth wishes science could eliminate the foul gas certain edibles create, notably cabbage and baked beans and when released cause vivid scenes of embarrassment to the offending ilk who do their best to conceal their guilt – at packed church suppers especially when neighborly conviviality and best behavior proximity often suffer most, and a stampede for fresh air becomes everyone’s need and the...

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My morning coffee is a stimulant, it motivates my regularity in an instant. And some mornings if my feet I dare to drag my underwear substitutes for a doggie bag. ...

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A five-year old precocious daughter asked her daddy where rabbits lived. To impress her, he straightway said: “In the ground in borrows, love.” The little girl looked puzzled. “Are you sure,” she said, “or is this just another adult fabrication like Santa Clause or the birth stork?” Dumbfounded by her response and eager to recover from his embarrassment,...

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