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Outpatient Procedure

[I got approved today for another procedure In the old days, a procedure was a surgery, Nowadays the insurance company approves It’s something akin to commercial burglary!] A surgery used to mean a long hospital stay But a procedure, you’re in-and-out in a day, They send you home with pain and a pill The pain really sets in when you get the bill. You get a form to fill out how well they did Yes, as though you’d know, it’s all so stupid. Take it from me, best to go in by ambulance No waiting for hours to be seen…perchance They rush you right into an emergency room, Before your infected appendix goes ka-boom. Feeling poorly, being grumpy is hardly a sin Try to go with the flow, take it on the chin, Keep in mind the doctors are doing their best To keep your heart beating inside your chest. Written May 27, 2022

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Caren Krutsinger

Date: 6/2/2022 4:13:00 AM

Oh man! "They rush you right into an emergency room, Before your infected appendix goes ka-boom." This is scary!

L Milton Hankins
Date: 6/2/2022 9:42:00 AM

I don't know how much you are acquainted with modern healthcare, but it's a nightmare. Before a doctor can perform my cataract surgery (a simple thing nowadays) he has to have approval from my cardiologist, a COVID test, and proof of vaccination, not to mention insurance clearance from the Veterans Administration. Whew!

Maurice Rigoler

Date: 5/28/2022 12:24:00 PM

My last surgical procedure was fixing a minor hernia ten years ago which I self diagnosed as a swollen prostate; happily it wasn't. As I age I resign myself to the fact that doctors and "procedures" will be part of my remaining years. Until then I do what I can to stay as healthy and problem-free as I can. / Maurice

Ilene Bauer

Date: 5/28/2022 11:45:00 AM

good luck with your procedure, milton! you've described modern medical issues quite brilliantly...

L Milton Hankins
Date: 5/28/2022 12:36:00 PM

Thanks, Ilene. Actually, I was trying to be a little tongue-in-cheek. And, there's much about the medical system that deserves it.

Robert Gorelick

Date: 5/28/2022 11:15:00 AM

Great sense of humor. By the way, I asked my doctor what I can do about low-blood pressure...He told me just to look at my bill once an hour. Cardiology has come a long way. Stay well Milt.

L Milton Hankins
Date: 5/28/2022 12:37:00 PM

Indeed, it has, Robert. Most of us suffer from high blood pressure. I don't know anything about low blood pressure, but of the two, I think I'd take it. Thanks, Robert, for your thoughtful comment.

Mark Koplin

Date: 5/28/2022 4:58:00 AM

Good luck bud!! My wife always gets the bill so I never see them. Ignorance can be bliss

L Milton Hankins
Date: 5/28/2022 10:15:00 AM

Indeed, it can be. Actually, I don't see them either. They go directly to the Veteran's Administration. I'm very fortunate that I have good medical care at minimal costs.

Mike Gentile

Date: 5/28/2022 4:39:00 AM

OMG, " The pain really sets in when you get the bill" is just perfect Milt! Hilarious and true! I wish I had thought of that! It'smy kind of humor! Great one, Happy Saturday!

L Milton Hankins
Date: 5/28/2022 10:15:00 AM

Thanks, Mike. Hope you're having a wonderful weekend.

Arthur Vaso

Date: 5/27/2022 8:54:00 PM

this is great, very similar to Canada, without the bill.

L Milton Hankins
Date: 5/27/2022 9:27:00 PM

Thanks, arthur. It would have been nicer here if there were no bill.

Bill Baker

Date: 5/27/2022 4:27:00 PM

Hope all goes well, my friend. I liked your poem and the thoughts you shared with us. Bill

L Milton Hankins
Date: 5/27/2022 5:05:00 PM

Thank you, Bill.

R J. Elless

Date: 5/27/2022 2:51:00 PM

Well said I like it.

L Milton Hankins
Date: 5/27/2022 3:00:00 PM

Thank you so very much, Howard. It's nice to hear from you, and I want you to know I appreciated your comment.

David Kavanagh

Date: 5/27/2022 2:18:00 PM

You should be fine Milton, but I would recommend you check for a bolt through your neck after surgery, they’ve been known to take shortcuts from time to time, all the best, cheers David

David Kavanagh
Date: 5/28/2022 12:44:00 AM

Or perhaps Hankinstein! Lol,

Jenna Logan
Date: 5/27/2022 4:18:00 PM

ha David. We'll have to start calling him Frankie.

L Milton Hankins
Date: 5/27/2022 2:23:00 PM

(chuckling) I'll be certain to do that, David. Thanks for the tip!

J. Summers

Date: 5/27/2022 1:18:00 PM

Good luck with your procedure. And remember to fill out your patient satisfactory form. They are counting on you. John

L Milton Hankins
Date: 5/27/2022 1:20:00 PM

Oh I do, John. I always get splendid care, and I always get the names of those who take care of me so well. I know it is important to them. Thanks for the read, the visit, and the comment.

Jenna Logan

Date: 5/27/2022 12:58:00 PM

Anyone cuts into me, I'll call it 'surgery.' You will undergo whatever procedures you need to keep kicking, Milt. We need and want your pen to keep us reading your wonderful poetry.

Jenna Logan
Date: 5/27/2022 4:17:00 PM

That's the best attitude, Milt. Trust in your doctor and God.

L Milton Hankins
Date: 5/27/2022 1:22:00 PM

Thanks, Jenna. They are getting all the approvals from my doctors for me to have my third carotid clean-out. My doc says he has a new procedure, so I guess that's what I'll get. The first one I had done was quite an ordeal, so I'm hoping this will go smoothly. He's a great doctor! I trust him implicitly.

Marco Chies

Date: 5/27/2022 12:40:00 PM

I was about 36 years old, my appendix was suppurating and I was practically dying when a (expensive) medical team saved me. I thanked them by paying every penny of that extortion. But I'm alive. I wish you all the luck in the world, Milton.

L Milton Hankins
Date: 5/27/2022 12:42:00 PM

Thanks, Marco. Most of my summer is being consumed with medical procedures, albeit necessary ones. I truly appreciate your well-wishes, my friend.

Tom Cunningham

Date: 5/27/2022 12:40:00 PM

Sadly it comes to us all hospitals doctors appointments etc. I laughed at my brother on his 40th when he said when you get to 40 bits start dropping off, the laugh was on me. Tom

L Milton Hankins
Date: 5/27/2022 12:44:00 PM

I love his way of putting it, Tom. If they don't drop off, they hurt! I think life is backwards--we should be born old and die young. In the coffin, they'd say of us, "He was a cute little thing!" (chuckling)

Sam Kauffman

Date: 5/27/2022 12:35:00 PM

Truth spoken to reality Milt. Hope yo are going to be alright. In my prayers.

Sam Kauffman
Date: 5/31/2022 10:30:00 AM

Know you remain in my thoughts and prayers. Will try to keep magnets away from you although pointing north seems to be a good metaphor for going in the right direction! Better than everything going south, I think! Blessings.

L Milton Hankins
Date: 5/27/2022 12:46:00 PM

The only one I'm worried about is the third foray into one of my carotid arteries. I have so many stents that when I get near a magnet I point north! (chuckling)