Poet Limericks - At least one stinker - Roy Jerden's Blog

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Poet Limericks - At least one stinker

Blog Posted:4/27/2013 12:26:00 PM
I had some fun writing about the poets here in the form of limericks.
I entered one of them in PD's bad poem contest.
Can you guess which one?

Get Your Red Hot Frank

There was a guy named Herrera 
Who wrote poetry in a caldera
More often than not
His poems were so hot
You had to rub on some aloe vera

French Tickler

There is a poet named Lamoureux 
Who can multi-task just like a pro
He tickled his wife
To an inch of her life
While he calmly composed a rondeau

Craigish Corn

There is a fine poet named Craig 
Whose rhymery never is vague
Though he may be Cornish
He is never forlornish
Cause he takes first prize at The Hague

(forced rhyme, but better than the plague)

Carry On, Carrie

She's the queen of poetical meter 
But you just have to know how to treat her
Unlike Carrie Nation
She'll take a libation
Then spew out some amazing vers libre

Tanned de Mams

There was a young poet named Mandy
Whose meter and rhyme was quite dandy
She consumed a zucchini
In her purple bikini
And got all the geezers quite randy

(just kidding!)

Give Me Moto Guzzi

She composes her verse in Jacuzzi
But her rhymery never is cutesy
In a poetry slam
Just yield and say ma'am
Or get flattened by sweet Debbie Guzzi

(just kidding!)

Moto Guzzi is an Italian motorcycle brand, in addition "moto" in Japanese means "more", which is what I want, more Guzzi.

Roux Bin Day

Sunday's my quiet bloomin' snooze day
And Monday's my all Cuban blues day
But the next day I go
To read a poet I know
I call it Good Boy Ruben Tuesday

Harry's A Pock O' Lips

The Four Horsemen come and it's scary
As they raze the towns and the prairie
Though all do abhor
The Horseman named War
There's one that I like that's named Harry

(just kidding Harry!)

Andrea, Lovely Meter Made

There is a sweet poet named Dietrich
Whose prosody sure is a neat trick
I swoon like a lamb at her
Iambic pentameter
And laugh at her indiscreet limerick

April 1, 2013

PD's Contests

For her contests, I always enjoy her 
Make her laugh, but never annoy her
If she gives you a nine
Like she did some of mine
It's the poem, not the Poet Destroyer

March 11, 2013

English Lit

There is a sweet poet named Johnson 
Who roasted my poem with a Ronson
If ever you spurn her
She'll turn on the burner
And toast you clear to Wisconsin

(just kidding, Joyce!)

Please Login to post a comment
Date: 4/28/2013 2:19:00 AM
I love JOyce's rhyming comment!!! And hey, we do not have to blog about our contest entries, do we, Roy? In any event, I found your blog on worst poems to be the most entertaining to date!
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Date: 4/28/2013 2:18:00 AM
so you say there is one for PD/that is bad? But which one could it be?/ I think I will curse/ if the one that is worst/ is the cute one you wrote about me!
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Date: 4/27/2013 4:36:00 PM
And now that the wrong has been righted... I'm sorry for being so slighted. ..A lim'rik from you.. And from Carrie too.. Has calmed me and keeps me delighted.
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Jerden Avatar
Roy Jerden
Date: 4/27/2013 4:39:00 PM
This is great! Hey! We could just do all our comments this way, no?
Date: 4/27/2013 2:54:00 PM
OH......ps....I think maybe two stinkers are the men limericks......Ruben, and Harry......but we forgive you as long as they are funny!!!!! (and yes........they all made the grade!)
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horsman Avatar
harry horsman
Date: 4/28/2013 4:49:00 AM
love you too Carrie
Date: 4/27/2013 2:51:00 PM
There is a sweet lady named Joyce/ Who scanned all the blogs of her choice/ She read Jerden's limericks/ But her name wasn't in it/ This poet is raising her voice!! LOL!!
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Date: 4/27/2013 2:15:00 PM
There was a young fellow called Jerden For whom writing wasn't a burden. He wrote limericks On heroes and hicks. But on me has never conferred one.
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Jerden Avatar
Roy Jerden
Date: 4/27/2013 3:32:00 PM
Ask and ye shall receive! Carrie took away half of the rhymes already! ;)

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