Bawdy Limericks II Judged
Blog Posted:7/6/2014 2:48:00 PM
The results are posted. I just wanted to make a few comments on the judging.
Poems with a bad syllable count were eliminated. I used the Syllable Counter to check and then double-checked manually if it showed the count off. It did make a couple of errors.
Poems with imperfect rhyme were eliminated. There were several.
Non-limericks or chained limericks were eliminated. There were two.
All remaining poems started in first place and were then demoted one or more places by the following criteria:
One minor spelling or grammatical error no penalty, otherwise one place per instance.
Explicit wording: One place per instance
No date on poem. One place.
Centering, bolding or italics used: One place (next time I will include double spacing as well).
Humor: Only mildly funny- One place. Not funny - Two places.
Meter: Imperfect meter - One place. Really choppy - Two places.
There was one chained limerick that was good and naughty, but that I had to eliminate due to the rules. I'll honor it here below.
I could do the body all day
Perform in a sexual way
The bump and the grind
Massaging the mind
And making it seem like a play
I took one look at her wonder
Deciding just how I would plunder
That beautiful ground
That grew on her mound
And that's when I slid from up under
I'd start with my fingers and tongue
The way I did when I was young
A hey diddle here
A play fiddle there
And over the moon we were flung
It was hard when I finished the job
I went from the shaft to the knob
But the fluid was slick
And I got such a kick
That I helped her wipe up the glob
For the "Bawdy Limericks II" contest by Roy Jerden.