Waistband Poems | Examples

List of Member Poems

Rocks, man

Found a rock
Cool as hell
Pulls me under
A magic spell

Heft in hand
Delight sky-rockets
Brush it clean
Fill my pockets

Pocket rattle
Waistband weighted
Rock-nerd-mode
Activated

Quirky, dull
Or sparkling jewel
Can’t deny it
Rocks are cool

Premium Member Meadowlark -a New Husband and Wife

I've tasted her liquid,  from her heart; Meadowlark 
Warm red taste of lavender meringue;
I held her hand;
Meadowlark 
Embraced her waistband hips; 
Touched her lips;
Made a wish;
We kissed
Meadowlark 
Consummated betrothed wedding night so Endearing we're husband and wife;
In the light in the dark
 Meadowlark

11/21/25
Written by James Edward Lee Sr

Premium Member Breaking a Confidence

Christy did not know how she was going to fix the problem.
Her sister Carol, had confided in her.
Christy knew she could not let Carol return out of state with her abusive husband.
The abuser was glaring at her when Christy came into the living room.
“Where is Carol?” he demanded. He was impatient to get going.

On automatic pilot, Christy said “DAD!”
Her father was lying on the floor watching TV
DAD!
He looked at her this time.
“Steve has been beating Carol.”

Without a word the sisters’ father got up off the floor.
Walked to Steve, spun him, and walked him out the door.
He had a hold of his neck.
He put his other hand on his waistband and plunked him over the porch railing.
It was about a fourteen foot drop.
Without another word Dad returned to his place on the floor.


Waist Bead Lover

Hey I'm not obsessed, that's not evil..
your mind is just full of evil that you can't see 
beauty in handmade.. 

Don't criticize, just look at your woman's waist 
without a waistband that's a waste of waist..

Buy her "Waist Bead", Let her glow while you stare with sensation... 

Let the vim of the waist bead vanquish the spirit of dysfunction and make you a Gladiator in the house of Pontus.. 

Let you enter the arena and battle while holding your lance like Bacca..

Let the sound of the waist bead summon the spirit of satisfaction... 

Let you be bewitched by the waist bead and have a well module immune system

Premium Member The Chigger Dance

The thing about chiggers:
I’m glad they’re not bigger.
They’ll make you go dancing
Like A. A. Milne’s Tigger.

Avoid ‘em with vigor!
When they pull the trigger,
Get under your waistband,
You may need a jigger.

Of whiskey! Of whiskey!
You’ve gotta ask right,
'Cuz chiggers are red
And jiggers are white.

O, chigger! O, jigger!
They both like to bite.
The former’s a flea;
The latter’s a mite.

Premium Member I'M Having a Fart Attack

My cousin’s just earned his degree
He majored in fartology
Now he can impart
What foods make me fart
He’s obsessed by scatology


I confessed that beans give me wind
(It matters not if fresh or tinned)
And onions and sprouts
In any amounts
cause farting that I can’t  rescind


The wind I produce is quite drastic 
as medics say my colon’s spastic
my poor tummy swells
I release foul smells
I’m thankful my waistband ‘s  elastic

FICTIONAL POEM FOR FART-TASTIC CONTEST

Sponsored by Chantelle Anne Cooke

09/15/21


Premium Member Leftover Willpower

Leftover Willpower
David J Walker

I know
	I know
What I said last night 
After the last bite of 
Turkey and dressing and 
Cranberry sauce and 
Pumpkin pie	
That I
Would never eat again
At least, not this much
	So much
That it stretched my belly to
New dimensions forcing me to 
Unbutton the waistband of my
Khaki dress slacks
I know
	I know
How good it all was
 and yet how
Bad for me at the same time
And how I fell asleep in the
Recliner watching reruns of
“It’s a Wonderful Life”
And the morning after 
When I cannot think of putting
Any more food in my mouth
Somewhere in the back of my head
Hatches a plan for later
Sliders 
Maybe one 
Reheated roll with
Turkey and dressing and 
Cranberry sauce 
	Small Sliders
Maybe two
	Just two
No more
But surely not three
Would you think it profane to
Curse the names of every Pilgrim 
Who landed on Plymouth Rock?
The bane of my weakening 
Leftover willpower
IT’s ALL THEIR FAULT!

Billboard Sign

billboard sign
winks at me
eat here now

temptation
hungry bear
buffet line

plate piled high
ten pounds plus
waistband stretch

Premium Member Resolutions

Reality check... I’ve noticed the
Elastic waistband has
Started to get even tighter on my  wife's pants ....
Only I daren't suggest she gives up candy -
Lets just say if she doesn't get her daily ‘ fix’ she turns
Uglier than the incredible hulk!
Take it from me when she gets PMT
It’s like walking on eggshells, so yet again my
Only option is to say 
Nothing...
So my resolution is to survive her mood swings for another year!

Resolutions contest Judged 02/16/20

FICTION POEM FOR CONTEST

02/06/20

Billboard Sign

billboard sign
winks at me
eat here now

temptation
hungry bear
buffet line

plate piled high
ten pounds plus
waistband stretch

Premium Member At Home At Starbucks

elastic waistband
society norms dead
wearing pajamas at Starbucks
no one stares
or cares
that I brought my own blanket too
as it is sometimes cold in here
a big change from home where
I will go to nap in an hour

Ride Home From the Beach

05/09/2018
                
                a sea of salt sand
                populates swimsuit waistband
                the oceans wet itch

She Is Two Saints

She is Two Saints:
            

Your feet make you happy 
when they bring you to the garden
where you are merry.
You walk among red roses,
and take their scent in.

Your storied days and busy nights,
we'll have one together -
turn off the lights.
I know how to use my hand,
under your waistband.
We are in that rose garden
and together it is right.

I kiss you deeply,
you sigh from your nose.
I with my hand under your clothes.
You are more than one; you are two saints.
You come so hard you nearly faint.

Becomings

There are times when the body
is as numinous as words – Robert Hass

Others, however, when it declares forcefully
its sheer bodiness;
your stomach tightens the waistband
of jeans you bought just last month
in the style of a ‘boyfriend’ you don’t have,
and no jumper’s baggy enough.

Physicality forces outwards, running.
Hills are the quickest route to redemption.
You recall Gethsemane as muscles flame,
fuelled by guilty glycogen from last night’s binge.
The world contracts corporeally.
Each stride increases the laxative effect
of emotions you don’t pretend to understand.

And yet there’s no catharsis
and escape from the self is absurd.
It’s the process of translation,
ritual purging through corporeal philosophy,
pounding the Will with rhythmic strides.
Forget those cloud-dwelling thinkers,
living in dualist minds of ascetic detachment.
Ask any runner: there is no destination.
It’s the shift, the constant becoming.
We’re all just atoms and stardust.

South Side

With lifeless eyes he forms the south side 
hand sign
represent his neighborhood is all he know
No remorse for his actions banging on the 
other side
Dope in his pocket pistol in his waistband 
pulling aiming firing shots with his left 
hand
Hot steel spiralling out the barrel of the 
gun empty shells and bodies hitting the 
pavement
Elevating the crime rate he celebrates with 
his homies back on the south side
Lines of cocaine being snorted off the 
stomachs of sluts with bloodshot eyes 
they scream southside
North Siders come through gunning 
automatic weapons being fired screams 
of whores echo through the night unable 
to return fire south siders lay dying with 
lifeless eyes they form the south side 
hand sign
written by Keith Edward Baucum aka The 
Brown Philosopher aka The Green Poet
aka Red Seven

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