Swank Poems

THE FAMOUS ACORN HEIST OF 2023

THE FAMOUS ACORN HEIST OF ‘23
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There once was a squirrel named Hank,
 Who rode on a Harley, quite swank.
     To the food bank he quickly sped,
     With a heist planned in his head,
For acorns, he thought he could prank.

He zoomed past the trees with a whoop and cheer.
His goggles and scarf made it most clear.
    He burst through the door with a grin.
    “Just a snack for my ride, no break in.
Not to worry. I won’t harm you. Have no fear.”

Ahh, but the food bank staff were quite astute
They were wise to his ridiculous, nutty pursuit.
     The joke was on our furry friend,
     For the food bank, they send,
Hank home with a bag of healthy fruit!

Mysterious Cyan

Written: December 16, 2023
                 _____________________________________

I sneak glance at veiled blue.
as swank stars start  to shine,
Sleeping, I sensed your love.
as warmth weaves through the heart,
Feeling the night above

I sneak glance at veiled blue.
through days that caught the moon,
with the whim that soon grasps
those who were backing me,
lasting the same long clasp

I sneak glance at veiled blue.
then climb the heights of sky.
zest the bright stars that shine.
Through the twilight impulse.
glimpse that my soul is thine.

I sneak glance at veiled blue.
Oh, divine timeless throne.
Your love has embraced us.
through my path shone a blaze.
freed and borne with life fuss.

Wallart Tinted Fresco

I’m building a wall
Ochre color, tan and tall
I hired an artist to paint a mural
Graffiti subtleties that will unfurl
White-washed and Chicano like me
I fell hard for him, exposing clarity
I knew there was no chance in hell
He’d choose a brown, White-washed Chicana for a spell
So, I’ll just play the victim and twist truth around
And make myself feel safe and sound
With my awesome poetry that I have in a bank
After twenty years of writing, I should be swank
There are plenty of Chicano painters in stock
I'll pay 'em with personal poems I keep under lock
I hear Cheech paints, Keanu Reeves too
He’s Hawaiian but he’ll surely do 

5/29/23

Big Puma Gammez

From the Editers Page... Dear Whoretense
                           What are We Gonna Do
                                    Bought to by
                       Ghemps Magic Tonic for Men


My pen pal of several months
Wishes to marry me.
He seemly thinks
He has found his
Certain someone
Some presumly speaking
Is me.

How do I tell him, I have
several others, who adore
my aquaitance and company.
Though we have shared numerous
Exchanges and dates,( the luxury spas
Of $@$@$-$@$@!) I find only interest
in being elusive of his wanting me. He
told me he was both flutist and bassoonist.
I thought he was a liar to have me impressed,
I found in addition he is both maestro and
conducted to a very well known Song House.
My others find my being with him, both
Invasive and concerning!
Dear Whoretence, what am I gonna do?
 
Sincerely,
Madam Guesser
Sultry Evasive Woman

Her Date Was Suave

Her date was suave; his place was swank
                          ~ blind drunk back then, now draws a blank

Gaffa and Swiggle Groove and Bounce

We went to Date-on Ohio
164 miles away to
Do the gig.
Swank and Swiggle
Has successfully convented
Our manager to stopover
 Linzzies Supper club
To hear the orchestra
Swede got drunk and
Wanted to mingle. He
Caught up wiff sum slink
she was tryna put him on
For the evening when
Gaffa started preaching
Bout us being wiff so many
women. Jealous, I mean jealous.
How he talking when he got
Twelve knuckleheads and
4 rx wives. I stayed in
The limo and watched the tele
Day up in linzzrys and come
Outside looking for cash to
Pay the suppa bill, me and the
Chafferier acted like we sleep.
I phoned it in, and then those
Fools come out wiff six woman.
And that hippocrite Gaffa wiff
Two of em!
Honey mambo sauce dripping off a his beard. 
Talking n about it being Christmas all over the world. That why I wrote
"Christa's All over the World"
That's why!

Sparrow

I’m a familiar bird with little shape,
Cute and brown with a lot of pep
There is nothing about me to swank 
I’m simple just how you think
Neither have graceful plumes, 
Nor blessed with mellifluous booms
But I’m the most sociable one
A symbol of joy and protection
I’m an icon of hard work 
And believe in team work
May be insignificant by stature,
Withstand every climate nature
Bathe in sand and water alike,
Sing in groups is what I like
Despite thrown into Red Book alerts, 
I serve my best to save you from pests. 
I am your little sparrow. 

I am a Bird - Personification Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Tania Kitchin 
Date: 27/07/2020
placed : 3rd.

Yaw Did It

May Day is "Lei Day" in Waikiki
But this year girls are looking sneaky
They're all wearing masks
And carrying flasks
But their swank is still rather cheeky

Tomorrow Never Comes

I have decided something and I want you to know.
My life will change from tomorrow!

I will stop having sugar.
I won’t look at chips and cake and burgers.

I won’t even rise up late.
Gymming, swimming, running would be my date.

Its high time, I need digital detox.
Books all around would make me rock.

Meditation and Yoga: my new swank,
Would surely refuel my think tank.

Yes, I can foresee,
Tomorrow would surely see a better me!

But tomorrow never comes, Is a proven fact! 
My dear heart, this is no pact!

The Sales Pitch

Obvious
Flamboyant hair, brazen strut, swank suit
Elusive spiel, furtive smile, sly eyes
Dubious

4/06/20

For 'Let the Pens Flow - Antonym' contest
Sponsor: Jenish Somadas

The syllable count was confirmed on howmanysyllables.com

Contractance

Tuxedo night
Get the limo
Guess
Tell 
Me Lady
I am in the car
Stepping out
We gonna dance the
Night away

Wretched Behavior beat Tuxedo Big Breed
At the rap and roll Jamba land
Strange reedmember got swank dacka
The disc ah dant, man Daggar, like
Sabatoging people's dreams. Folk think darts ah
Cool thang. Watch the mischeivous b. Scandelous
Griffa dude, he self serving behind the back
Tricker,vman ain't nobody getting married round here.
Fliss dough witta, she ain't got know man. bills
kneads paying den , day when hymn her man.
She fuss wiff hymn den, she have know man.
Day shytt ain't gonna jive in here.
That shytt ain't gonna jive in here.
Up in here wiff day bankday shytt.
Day shytt ain't gonna jive in here!

They wished me to ask her
To invite all the independent
Organization.
To form a parent company
That regonizes
An Undisputed Independent
Championship
That makes each members
Company number one contender
To the overall tecgnized trophy

Damsel

Epaulets of schmaltzy eyes set to be so loose
Given a glass of rosewater, its perfect booze!
This cattish damsel in the planetary alignment of swank
Regularly chichi, sometimes bltchy
Never mind, always kind, two-up for a Blanc.
A scene isn’t required in this oratorio of vigorous clap,
Attend our burlesque all graceful, with a strap,
Ready for a striptease of the intellect
In the house of opaque ornaments and frill
No defence, for I've come to kneel
Before the throne thrown a bone
And over it like a dog I bog-in
Committing - a sin after sin.
Where to stop, when to cop?
Though if it is dead when all is said
In the endless abyss of frenzy and tears
I command the battle of no fears
Until the end of Act 1
Stay put, it’s not done!
You’ve moved, you’ve improved
It’s time! It’s time!

Oh I'M Cursed So

Oh!  How he sauntered like a lord with his flaunt
The bluster and strut so nonchalant
The swank and sway blew me away
And swept me under the table like child's play!

My!  His handsome style
His arrogant modesty was no denial
He beamed as he jilted so tauntingly
Every female around was flibberty-jibberty

Cursed!  As he grabbed my eye balls out of their sockets
My heart in my throat-my stomach an empty pocket
While his prance in tight pants made me dance
Wishing for one real bona fide chance

So!  Afraid of the outcome of dealing with this situation
Argh!  "Get em up scout!" I'm cutting out
My courage is fading to total damnation
By this spellbound swagger sensational "knockout"!!

Expressions of Swank

Oldies but goodies still turn my crank
Perry, Deano, Nat and of course Frank
Civilized crooners
Before the “baby boomers”
They were it, a pure expression of swank

Anger a Crime 3

A delicate, gentle, subtle line
Between love and anger mine
Is capable of making me bovine.
Though, we human, better than kine
Keep Anger without any deadline;
Swank like proud, angry feline
To clutch and hurt anyone divine.
Are we not better than equine
Of Swift? Or different by hairline
From Yahoos of Jonathan’s line?
Leave anger, be a Guideline.
Be happy and brightly shine
Over the mast or sea at nine.
Sea: big, vast  – though – brine, 
No use for us, can’t replace vine.
Hence leave anger and whine
Like a free butterfly divine.

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