Dick Poems

A Composing Dick

I think, AI can fool the surface eye,
the sun of everyday common day -- 
the night of charming only twinkle glitter 
night -- 
      But, what it can’t fool~ is, complex
soul spectrum; what it can’t step away
from is, its own deceitful presence – 
the blight of laziness -- felonious poetic

A Literal Dick Measuring Contest

I laid down my long schlong 
On a table full of kong dongs
The judges had short tongs 
To flip the dongs flop
the men and women on song 
You wouldn't guess who won?
God, Tom, John, Cock?
No, you are so wrong 
It was not my long schlong 
Or Johns God  throbbing Cock 
It was  Moscow

Dick Longly

He lived in a small village
Dick Longly was his name
He was known for miles around
An extra long willy his claim to fame

The men folk thought him a legend
Considered him unbelievably blessed
The women wanted to get to know him
Put that legend to the test!!

Dick was known by many a name
One “The Three legged man”
“Dick the Donkey

Broke Dick

.

             landloper
         cigarette twista

            wine lippa

             (hic'cup)


     

Who Dares Rouse Leviathan

Who dares rouse Leviathan,
the Giant beneath the heaving deeps?
This world now teams with Ahabs
whose heaping anger never sleeps.
Each one wants to hook its jaw
and each to press its tongue;
to try its rich and fragrant oil
and see it bound and beached and dumb.

Poor soul captains on fragile ships
vainly sharpening the barbless spear.
The Whale scoffs beneath the

Toothache

Violate everything.
Upset all order.
re-stack the cards,
deal me to a world
where my id rules,
rid me of what cares
about right, wrong 
or you.

Or it's gonna kill me.

I'm Ahab.  
Says Stub,
"he's got what some folks ashore call   *
a conscience; it's a kind of Tic-Dolly-row 
they say--worse nor a toothache."

Way worse than a toothache.
Covers tangled,
pillows scrunched,

Tom Dick and Harry Dog

Tom Dick and Harry were brought fishing by Grandpa Pete.
he argued they would starve at home, with nothing to eat.
they’ll get into the fish and gobble them up said aunt Mary.
prediction totally spot on, knowing Tom, Dick and Harry.

Dick the Coward

I’ve written about “Dick The Bully”
“Dick The Ignorant” also
This poem is about “Dick The Coward”
Who is one of the lowest of low

“Dick The Coward” you are gutless
You follow and persecute in a pack
You ride on the coat tails of other bullies
Then cowardly and viciously attack

Afraid to voice your vile comments
Unless the other Dicks are there
You

I Am Hal I Mean Dick

Hal is a catfisher.
He has had lots of dates this month.
He cannot believe how fast women are these days.
They practically tear your pants off.

He poses as Dick, a bachelor.
Says he is an artist and a composer.
Today’s lunch date is late.
She shows up and he is startled.

It is his wife.
She had used a different photo.
Said her

Why Dick and Jane Can'T Write

Dick and Jane go to college
     to learn how to read and to write

   'Cos they didn't in high school
     where they studied, on You-Tube, the rights

   of violent protestors, sexual predators, 'n gender-bathroom rules
      ~ not to

Philip K Dick 2-3-74

At sea
Fish of gold gleams 
Old memories return 
Beam of sunset’s pink light sent from
Valis

Dick and His Cat

Dick and his cat
 I was in the deep depth of youth
sitting in a library struggling through
Dick Whittington and his cat.
Looked the fable up on Wikipedia
and was disappointed,
Dick and his cat were different 
from my recollection
I had the cat and Dick walking 
to London 
In my fantasy world, the story was
much richer, so I will

Tricky Dick - Not Nixon, Lol

Sophisticated, debonair, dashin'
Epitome of ultra-cool passion
 They called him Tricky Dick
 Thought himself mighty slick
Slipped on her runway ~ came to... spent, ashen

A Suitable Replacement

Whom I had decided to pick 
For the office was Dick,
Until I learnt that he’d been sick,
Unable to even his lips lick  
And on drugs to not seem a stick…


And I had to settle for Nick.
Now sure that it was no trick 
Like wonderful jobs, in reality ‘slick’,
Yet aware that Approved Nick 
Had been

Dick the Ignorant

DICK, you think yourself fearless 
Protected by your screen
Shaming and blaming ,being hurtful
So brave and bold when unseen

Now DICK ,its obvious you don’t refrain
From spewing out uneducated remarks
Maybe that’s all you know
And ignorance is embedded in your brain

Your behaviour presents in a few ways
Via comments , poems and one liners
Abundant with insults and sarcasm 
Lacking

• Short Dick Poems
• Famous Dick Poems
• Best Dick Poems
• Read Dick Poems
• Long Dick Poems
• Dick Quotes