Tape Measure Poems - Poems about Tape Measure

...My cousin-in-law’s grandma was at a party. She says, “Me and my husband had sex almost every day.” I think some of us fell out of our chairs. So she goes on, “Almost on Monday, almost on Tuesday…” ......Read the rest...

...My friend Sharon is the same as me as we have decided to let it all hang free. No more corsets or underwire because we feel we are still on fire. Without recourse to peer pressure or need to ......Read the rest...

...It’d been a long day at work So he sat in the sun Enjoying the beer he’d earned The day finally done Closing his eyes he relaxed When a persistent peep Interrupted his dreaming And he starte......Read the rest...

... That day, I was on my scale, thought I was fat? Till I realized, i was holding two, five pound cats! Scales are deadly, for women, it is proven true. Use ......Read the rest...

...Santa’s workshop was full of singers of every kind of voice. The loudest one that sounded like gravel was my cousin Joyce. She was wrapping and humming, and they all sang along. We are in the best......Read the rest...

...They examined me with tape measures in their eyes as I entered superimposing famous female faces over my own in their minds like pictures printed on clear plastic sheets placing one atop another o......Read the rest...

...I’m sorry I’ve no homework, But it’s really not my fault, I tried hard all last week to do it, But got such a jolt! Sat down to do my homework, It was history that day, The theme was myths and ......Read the rest...

...ENTHUSIASTIC AMATEUR I am lying here trapped and need some assistance, And all because of my husband’s persistence. “You don’t have to buy any bookshelves,” he said. “I’ll pu......Read the rest...

...A Scot had once been quite handsomely built Now with corona did not fit his kilt Ate all he could find With more on his mind Became rotund and his manhood did wilt Isolation made th......Read the rest...

...They say that the average US member is 160mm long, don't rush for the tape measure - it might be wrong; I'm not sure if that applies to the innuit as well, just because they're a bit short, you ne......Read the rest...

...New England's late May sun was long up, and yet her laundry began to unfold and clip onto the droopy clothesline, while yet to warm into 8 AM. She wore a light spring jacket and need not think......Read the rest...

...Distant babble, a shout, an egg beater, What does the clock say? More noise, a dream dancing just beyond memory’s reach, Where are my glasses? 6:45, no, 8:54 I found them on the sill. Down one,......Read the rest...

...To find my hidden treasure No need for a tape measure “X” does not mark the right spot Treasure hunters get one shot Unravel my hidden code, and watch my treasure unfold The key is words you......Read the rest...

..."Too young!" were the words that everyone said, while working so hard to get a degree. First time on our own, and fresh newlyweds, seeking employment, yet happy were we! In a strange ne......Read the rest...

...tape measure in hand soft spoken,"Can't believe it".... dust upon treadmill Inspired by the contest about addictions not an entry.... Since my back problems and t......Read the rest...