Long Defecation Poems

You've heard that self-unfulfilling prophecy?
"I love humanity--
it's just people I can't stand."

I love healthy humanity--
it's just uppity and/or snooty people I can't stand

I love cooperative humanity--
it's just overly-competitive individuals I can't stand.

Not so distant from,
I...

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Damian was on the tele-video 
conference with various Prestigious 
Proper people of distinction. The US
Vice president was on Skype along
With Secretary of State. He spoke 
With Russia's top diplomat, Valeiry
Sergei Shonikov, South African president 
Holu...

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Twice told toilet tale – a cheeky execrable gross fable

which poetic product best be affixed 
with hashtag STINKY label.

As a young whippersnapper
and one precocious lad to boot,
I discovered common combustible materials
found in the bathroom.

At opportune...

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Watching upcoming toilet bowl lvii highlight of February 12th, 2023

Above title attests 
how mine mundane mein kampf
insync as a veritable clogged drain oh:
flush with adventure overflowing excrement
er... rather excitement.

Apt aforementioned accurate personal description
believe me not,...

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Watching upcoming toilet bowl lvi highlight of February 13th, 2022

Above title attests how mine mundane mein kampf
insync as a veritable clogged drain oh:
flush with adventure overflowing excrement
er... rather excitement.

Apt aforementioned accurate personal description
believe me not,...

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Prolonged offal bout courtesy constipation... turgid song redux,
a worse hellish fate than perdition really sucks

As of early morning
today - September 8th, 2022,
I could not but barely move
mine whole body felt
analogous to sluggish mollusk
frequent constipation found...

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Date  June 2024
A large group  picketed outside 
Of the toilet paper factory. 
People held picket
Signs marching in a circular line.
The Group chanted: 
Revolters deserve better bottom
Paper on this caper!  The group
Became bigger...

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Stimulus check(up), visited mine local gastro-intestinal economy

Around high noon
today March 19th, 2021
fecal impaction I did plaintively croon
until effect courtesy amitiza, which
prescription medication
(in short a laxative)
served as amazing grace saving boon.

Once activated - impossible mission
to suppress...

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Mine Nightmare With Social Anxiety,...
Now Mostly Purged

Decades removed when body electric
felt tortured reverberated, and quaked
with MegaDeath repercussions tattooing, 
piercing, foisting, ensnaring, drubbing
 
drum beat indelibly 'pon psyche NON 
MEMORABLE years gone bye felled 
psyche with...

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Everyone nose, I haint no otolaryngologist

Nonetheless this bard arse feels gratitude
courtesy Laurence V. Cramer, D.O.
without cerumen eye zing
May 17th, 2022 'ere
and thank dog guardian angels,
who find me continually blessed
regarding audiological sense to hear,
whereby faculty sound...

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Helplessness invades
into my life and into my world
Chaos; Disorder

Helplessness invades
trying to imprison you in a box of no choices
	:A box made of tinted glass
	buried under the old, dry earth
	without any openings but the small split...

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Defecation clogged toilet bowl...
courtesy prescription laxative AMITIZA

and found (me) zee papa pooped out,
thus embarrassing communiqué I post,
a reasonably rhyming poetic shout
to air grievances
concerning outsize bowel movement
hoping (fat/slim chance)
Mike Rowe happens tubby about,
though shadow of doubt
he...

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Hurriedly enroute to her royal majesty
porcelain goddess throne
whereupon earlier today
March 28th, 2022,
after incomplete defecation
sitting pretty on pissoir,
I jiggled and wiggled posterior

(analogous to performing
the bum bared hustle)
until gasping for breath
though unable to shake loose
dangling dingleberry yours...

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I studied cosmology for 4 years before I realized there was no mention of make-
up or hair styling.

I saw the movir "Superfly", and didn't understand why they never even showed a 
zipper!

I wanted Lasix surgery-...

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I seethe with livid rage within the bowels of my being
when sitting upon the porcelain goddess ample defecation doth cling
immediately triggering an internal self hatred 
   charge of body electric to signal an...

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Prolonged offal bout courtesy constipation... redux
a worse hellish fate than perdition

At least forty eight hour time span
lapsed whereby big boy wanted to cry
explaining how yours truly 
felt he would die
an undertaking malaise
found me experiencing physical...

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Defecation clogged toilet bowl courtesy metamucil..
and found (me) zee papa pooped out

Anal eyes zing thee
nightly dump for yesterday
July 8th, 2020 - whereby
plunger helped obstruction give way
I nearly lost me life and limb oy vey

oh my...

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Detailing delicate defecation debacle

Otherwise wordily titled: pooped out
after pouring bucketfuls of water into 
place of ablutions
all the while skipping to my loo
umpteen times courtesy bathtub faucet
turned toward hot temperature
so toilet would finally,
magnificently, and royally flush.

As...

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I awaited the hour of Your presence to come.
I spent my energy in patient silence waiting for Your voice.
I fell lost for thought and direction.
My mind flooded aimlessly into the endless corridors.
I sunk down into...

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Yet upon another reflexive routine dash
skipping to Waterloo, I got emboldened
with idea praising basic vital functions
aware requisite elimination of liquid
and/or solid waste any obstruction
disallowing body to expel toxins would

prove fatal, thus gratitude toward
regular unpicturized, unhindered,...

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otherwise wordily titled: pooped out
after pouring bucketfuls of water into 
place of ablutions
all the while skipping to my loo
umpteen times courtesy bathtub faucet
turned toward hot temperature
so toilet would finally,
magnificently, and royally flush.

As ofttimes occurred in...

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And so they sat, this learned three
in full pursuit of liberty,
the turkey, eagle and the dove
looked down upon them from above.

The declaration almost writ
they rubbed their chins a little bit;
looked heavenward, and there espied 
their...

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After all of the hard hits

And you hitting the fake witch

And calling the sweet schoolteachers name

You feel the fires of  hell  and have the

Smell of urination and defecation

And you're tired from a beating

And...

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less than twenty four hours after dashing off a poem 
   explaining why i wanted to die
found me experiencing physical duress vis a vis, 
   a bowel movement wherein waste unable...

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Let's think this over as if there's anything to say
Push me to the level that makes you feel superior
God forbid you realize how low you really are

Let's be careful, don't want to offend your delicate...

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