In the quiet, darkened corners of the mind/
Where shadows stretch and twist, emotions bind/
Lies a land where peace is hard to find/
Admist the chaos, stress leaves us blind/
Psychosis weaves it's tale of fear and doubt/
Illusions bloom, and reasons fade out/
The world distorts, perceptions fall askew/
A fragile grip on reality breaks through/
Voices whisper secrets in the night/
Haunting dreams take away the light/
Innocent thoughts become monstrous and cruel/
And reason slips away, like water from a pool/
Stress, restless, tightens it's fierce embrace/
Driving heart and mind to frantic pace/
Seizures strike, like lightning in the storm/
A body's plead for peace, a soul's reform/
The breath catches, gasping, panic fills the air/
The struggle, gasping, drowning in despair/
Yet heartbeat steady, blood pressure remains/
A mystery that defies the body's claim/
Admist the tumult, seek the gentle touch/
Of understanding hearts that offer much/
For in the sharing, healing can begin/
And in the darkness, light will surely win/
So to my doctor, these words now impart/
May empathy and care guide their way/
To help find solace, and brighter days/
Insomnia:self induced
I had a rough night didn't sleep much at all
So i make my coffee strong sweet and tall
Got to wake up and get on with the day
Caffeine infused and sugar laced
Tonight I'll go to bed,not stay up so late,
And meet the dawn if i get there by eight
The afternoon crash comes to me before noon
So another pot of coffee I'll brew, maybe two!
Wow! I'm productive! I get everything done! Start feeling sleepy again ‘ound about one…no more coffee,or I'll never get to bed, so I drink some diet Pepsi instead!
Made it through work,cooked dinner for all…it's 6pm and I'm ready to fall…I'll just have some dessert for energy,black coffee’d go great so i make more for me.
And here i am,wide awake once again. Not sleepy at all and its 2am. I don't understand why i cannot sleep…i stay busy all day and i feel so beat…I finally lay down to try for a few winks…and wake up to the very same thing!
I had a rough night didn't sleep much at all…so i make my coffee, strong sweet and tall.
Totems are usually made of materials
Not constructed using real animals
But this totem was formed by living creatures
The fox was not at the top, weirdly enough
Being the lightest, you might have thought that
Because it would have made sense
But this fox is at the bottom
Holding up a bear, holding up a tiger
Spiritually they are connected
The fox, the bear, the tiger and the swan
Where was the swan? At the top
She was the only one who made sense
But this is a dream totem
A dream held in a sweat lodge
A peyote induced dream
That somehow makes sense
drug induced fog is a breeze
hopefully keeps pain away
I will take morphine if you please
It just might be the only way
Swaying pendulum of the hypnotist
Impossible for mind-body to resist
It transfixes our attention in a trance
Stillness then being our only chance
Fact that singularity contains duality
Self inflicted hypnosis blocking clarity
Is known only in stillness and silence
When ends with images our indulgence
There is no meditator in our meditation
Lifting of the veil mirrorless recognition
The clue offered every night we sleep
Dreams unreal where we laugh & weep
While awake ceasing ego identification
We exit all illusions in quiet meditation
Though memory imagery yet pursues
Vaporised presence bliss throb renews
Stillness innate within in each vibration
Cessation at point of polarity rotation
Be it in thought or breath or heartbeat
Hiding in open sight this truth repeats
We see this not being bound by a spell
Mesmerised by illusions where we dwell
To exit all we do is to go to the centre
Nonchalantly each life flavour savour
In stillness
26-August-2020
I'm more than halfway to the gates
or so the statistics fancy to say.
Seen a lot but want to see a whole lot more.
Haven't suffered or laughed enough
Need a few more scars and scuffs.
Need to grow up a little, but I'm trending down.
Need to hide pain efficiently and struggle on more gracefully.
Buttress the weaknesses-maintain the strengths.
Though I don't have enough mental mortar.
Need to toss these streaks of jealousy in the pit.
Need to pare down this gigantic bucket list.
Appease some goals-go for one last blitz.
But I'm running low on energy and time.
Where are those auxiliary tanks of life?
I need to pray more?
Have I done enough for family and friends?
I need to be humbler
Have I done enough for myself?
I've got to stop whining.
Be a bigger man-struggle on in stoic silence.
I need to pray for others more-and mean it
Morphine induced dream
In a sedated scene
Killer clowns are on the loose
And mixing with the zombies
Out for blood and out for flesh
I heard blood curdling screams
From victims of this horror show
That are virgin and teens
All prey to the nightmares
All trying to flee
The circus of horror
Of their dreamscape belief
Trapped inside their conscious minds
Filled with psychotic memories
Induced by drugs and medicine
To deal with hyper activity
To keep them all seemingly normal
In a messed up society
It's very close to Halloween and the real hilarity
Is that this real world is more scary and gory than we could ever truly believe
Let's all sit and hope that another dose of morphine soon kicks in
And takes us too another world a whole lot better than this
Or will it take us back to the world of horror in between
The this nightmare reality or of the twisted place of our dreams.
Image courtesy of Pinterest
Mr. Vodka went to go see Ms. Fireball, to take her to the Crown Royal for some fun. They got all Jacked up, so the left there and went to Margarita ville so he could show her his Malibu Rum.They walked down the Scotch on the Rocks, to have Sex on the Beach, he took out his Tulamordew and they began to screw. She became like a "Hot Apple Pie", with her Silky Panties and Slippery Nipples,with a gleam in his eye he gave her the Slow Gin. Her Fuzzy Navel was at it's peak. With a Tennessee Fire he thrust one last time, and when his Seagrams spewed in haste like a Hurricane she gave him a Snake Bite. She rode his Barcardi till she let loose and finally gave him her Grey Goose. They gazed at the Black Velvet and Sky Vodka stars with the Moonshine above them, and a little Southern Comfort in their hearts. Nine months later there became a little Tequila Rose and a little Jim Beam.
the sun seems stiff today
the brightness has not the same effect
all in life seems glum
the energy in me is all but naught
all i wanna do is lounge and loaf
procrastination is a hidden gem of an island
i hear the music now as i put on the dusty lei for the day
i guess this is how loneliness feels when it takes its toll
i lost faith in faith, and now i am just pauper and a misanthrope
my idea of fun is counting the dust particles in the air
my idea of leisure is sitting in a cobwebbed corner to think of her
oh how she represented fun times and impromptu escapes
oh how she symbolized precious memories and sincere, purified joy
now she is gone and looking at me from a special place in the sky
there are many broken fragments of fragmented fragments with teardrops on them....
....all in the name of you....
Apart we stand and together we crumble.
She's hiding in the bathroom letting her world unravel.
Did three bumps wiped her nose; began to stumble.
Living her life between the sudden slams of the gavel.
She makes herself believe fatalities can't happen,
While she's gripping the toilet seat gasping.
For water to hydrate the rolls; she's ashen.
Unable to justify the messed up way she's been acting.
Her friends turn their backs on her addictions.
She's running all day to pick up a new bag.
Calling someone else to buy their latest prescription.
Wasting her money left and right on some bulls**t swag.
To the point where she disgusts herself living in the past.
Where did that little girl go from four years back.
Rocking back and forth on the tile her eyes are glass.
Fighting off the oncoming asthma attacks.
As her pupils begin to dilate she wishes for the best.
The darkness closes in as tears fill her cup.
The shakes take over now it's time to lay to rest.
Her last words will always be 'It was never enough.'
gentle drone
rain drums sleepily
on my metal roof
Literary bridge to nowhere
Without compass, pen as guide
Through rambling discourse
O'er every jagged meter
Free, rhythymless strides
Unconsciously retreading again
Stumbling every step
Into vapid, lyrical retreat.
Do you see me?
Do you even hear a single word I say?
Is the universe you are in the same as mine?
Did you see the tears I shed as I looked at you?
Or did the chemicals change your reality?
I wish that you could tell me
Yours eyes are closed and unmoving
Twitching and shifting
Yet unable to open
Unable to see me watching you
I think that you may know that I am there
Yet, I wonder what you are dreaming about
What thoughts are running through your mind?
When you awake will you tell me?
Will you even remember what they were?
I will wait until you are ready
Watching you until you awaken
Until your eyes open and you smile again
When I hear you say hello
Only then will I know that everything is alright
Drug Induced love
You said you loved me when we first met,
As you snorted the line freshly chopped on the table
Powder still on your nose, eyes watering…
You kissed me and said "glad your mine"
You said you would always be there
As you rolled the joint, ends over flowing with weed
Smoke escaping your lungs
Forgetting what you were supposed to remember
You said I was the one…
As you took the magical little pill covered in hearts
Eyes rolling, feelings of ecstasy
You kissed me and said "glad your mine"
First I thought you were crazy
Then I thought you were just high
Now I realize... I am your god!
Your love induced by the drugs.
I am your one, you’re only....
Your dealer.......
I’m common sense and drug induced
Laid out on a sepulcher
Begging for more
More lights and more darkness
More health and more sickness
More death and less life
More soul and less body
So weak, strong-willed
The kill, I’m ill
The window sill
The fill, the spill
So nil, so nil
The kill, I’m ill
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