You tied the noose that I hang from
I stare at the writing on the wall
I feel like all the words are written wrong
My feet can’t find the stall
I wish my thoughts would just be gone
I am the rope in which they tie
I can’t seem to shape the future of my life
Got me thinking am I the one who’s ready to die
I decided to roll the dice
Sick of living a lie
Why did I think twice
Now I’m begging for a reason why
My friends, I am at the end of my rope -
all because I'm an incredible dope.
I thought two girlfriends was better,
but, when I sent them a letter,
I put each one in the wrong envelope.
All alone deep inside
Feeling like I wanna cry
No one ever understands
Cuz they're always making plans
My worlds quickly falling apart
Vastly destroying my fragile heart
Vainly trying to hold it together
Teetering on the edge forever
Losing everything so close
Feeling like an unwelcomed ghost
No matter what I try
Everything either leaves or dies
Wishing I can get rid of my stress
Thinking this is all a test
Feeling I'm at the end of my rope
Extremely close to losing all hope
Wishing someone saves me someday
These words to god I pray
Life is such a delicate dance.
I never even had a chance.
Getting older, everyone is gone.
Alone, I feel so alone.
My friends left long ago.
The streets are so unforgiving.
I wish I knew another way of living.
Weapons don’t scare me, people do.
They use, abuse until they are done with you.
Wild and free, a classic beauty.
My flame’s so hot it burns me.
Running so hard, I drew the death card.
Trying to win a loosing fight.
I won’t last another night.
Hanging onto hope, at the end of my rope.
With no place to go, ode to Nicole.
Intrusive thoughts inside my head
Internal conflict while I lie in bed
Visions are getting blurry but louder
I'm getting weaker by the hour
My body feels like it’s decaying,
My hopes and dreams evaporating
Voices in my head start ringing
They sound just like the sirens singing
I know they’re deadly, lethal, fatal
I try to stray, but I’m not able
The singing slowly turns into screams
I feel a sharp pain inside my spleen
I know what I did to deserve this pain
And now I know I cannot change
The things I’ve done to incur this wrath
When I try to get up, I slowly collapse
Back to the bed in which I am laying
And my blurry vision keeps on fading
I feel like I’m at the end of my rope
There's nothing I can do nothing to help cope
And as my last words start to spray
I feel that rope begin to fray
This is what happens when I let the shadow within
Triumph over me with a horrendous win
Life I have known
While I have grown
Some memories grow hazy
But I have always embraced my crazy
Time I was to bold
I know this now that I am old
I try to keep my heart from growing cold.
Peace I always sought
Even the times I fought
My heart was free
So much I have yet to see
Hope
Sometimes at the end of my rope
Sometimes I had to take a knee
Collect myself and gather the strength to be
The man I call me
The man I hope to save
Before the grave
Life passes like a wave
I was who I wanted to be
In the mirror, not who I expected to see
But I accept it as me
Embracing Hope
Miracle Man
2/24/2023
I oft have days when It’s tough to cope,
and I search for a knot at the end of my rope.
That’s when I begin pushing the envelope,
and find myself on the slippery slope.
I found the answer and no longer mope,
the answer was Jesus, He gave me hope.
“When you say a situation or a person is hopeless,
you are slamming the door in the face of God.”.
Rev. Charles L. Allen
Some times it's
hard to love you
When you make me
Feel so bad
how could happy times
And promises
Turn out
To be so sad
When you hold me
In your arms
You make
Everything alright
Yet the neighbors
And me all know,Baby
Your
Somewhere else tonight
Chorus dripping with steel guitar
-----------------------:::::--------::::::::::::-----------------::
Truly I wish
You could be
Satisfied with me
Wanting nothing more
second verse of chorus
-------------+----------- ditto on steel ----------------+------------
True to me
I wish you could be
But you never have
Been able to before
Back to song
--------------
I miss you
When we're parted
Though your making
my heart bleed
I'll always have
the fondness but someday
I'll kick the need
And you know that I'd
be lying if I said
I wished you'd go
But I'm clinging
To the knot
at the end of my rope
And I thought that you should know
Close with chorus
--------------------
If so minded
Disappointment comes in shades of blue and gray
Delivered with a large dose of dashing hope,
My mind vacillates between sadness and dismay.
‘Tis time to put on a happy face for a better day
Fighting the strong urge to sit around and mope,
Disappointment comes in shades of blue and gray.
For me, disappointment is a perfect way to decay,
It is always important to find a solution, to cope
My mind vacillates between sadness and dismay.
It helps finding something amusing to enjoy, to play
Or, engaging in an activity that enlarges my scope,
Disappointment comes in shades of blue and gray.
Even then, on the edges of my mind, I cannot allay
Feelings that, somehow, I’m at the end of my rope,
My mind vacillates between sadness and dismay.
When disappointment strikes, I wish I could be gay
I suppose the censors will allow me this apt trope,
Disappointment comes in shades of blue and gray
My mind vacillates between sadness and dismay.
Written April 7, 2022
An Old Warrior
This old man, sward in hand, takes a stand
against the Provincial, the Municipal man.
The power hungry, with all the appropriate tools,
who treats us, his constituents, his voters as fools.
Our voices are stilled, silenced by political oratory
as they convince us of the sincerity of their story.
They operate, under the radar, with impunity
whether they are innocent or they be guilty.
This old man, sward in hand, takes a stand
against the Provincial, the Municipal man.
I think that I have reached the end of my rope
as I battle with the powers that be, without hope.
Three years, ten years without satisfaction,
not the courtesy of a response, nor reaction.
Ignore, and eventually I will simply go away.
This is the game they both choose to play.
The powers that be will always get their way.
For us old warriors, not much left, but to pray
B. J. “A ” 2
April 25th, 2021
Holding on to a sliver of hope
That the day will bring good fortune
Though I fear I'm at the end of my rope
And the fall below is grand.
Eye to eye with a final thread,
Splintering into sinews.
I've wasted my time to stay ahead
and dealt my own lost hand.
I’m trapped in this nightmare,
A never ending dream of violence.
Is it because you don’t care,
That I constantly receive silence?
I’ve looked to hope,
I’ve looked to fate.
At the end of my rope,
I feel your benevolent hate.
Your silent voice not sating,
Just tell me what you have to say.
So I’m left here waiting,
But I’m slowly wasting away.
In you, I’m trying to believe.
Do you intentionally deceive?
Mixed messages constantly shown,
Nothing straightly told.
I’m left staring at my phone,
Longing for a hand to hold.
I’ve got to get it straight,
My head is on backwards, dear.
I’m always a step too late,
Always bringing up the rear.
You said you wouldn’t give up,
You said you would grow with me.
The bombardment of hate disrupts,
A time spent masking what I can see.
We told each other that we’d try,
We told each other we would grow.
You’ve left a rotting mind to die,
I see now what your actions show.
But you, promised!
I study my scowl in the back of a spoon
As the Rumbletide ripples in a cup of Joe*
The lap desk that holds it is vibrating, too…
The window is shattered, my boots bumbletied
The knife pricks my neck, right there in the ‘V’
And the fellow who holds the knife is me.
__________________
* coffee
(Just a note – this is fiction!)
February 15, 2019
Submitted for: Reflect That Emotion Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Nina Parmenter
Spiraling out of control
Need to find something
To keep me from falling
Further into the abyss
Overwhelming sadness
As well as fear
Has taken over
Wreaking havoc
Searching for tranquility
Looking for peace
Where is my lifeline
I’m at the end of my rope
Better tie a knot
Hang on for dear life
I see the sunshine in the distance
Just out of my reach
I extend my hand toward it
Hoping something will help me
Find my way back
From the darkness
That has become my reality
I will not give up hope
I will find my way back
Just focus on the light
And stop looking down
I'm at the end of my rope ironic cause my death was by the ends of a rope hung out with some friends lol get it hung out with my friends hanging by a rope depression, anxiety, ecstasy, and a girl named Sam are the only friends that I know I'm laughing and crying cause honestly I'm at my end and I know your mediocre x bestfriend aka the greatest slope that I know. (Ring, ring, ring) "The person you are trying to reach could not make it to the phone you can call back or leave a message shortly after the beep...beep, I'M SORRY SAM"
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